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skip fox

skip fox's Journal
skip fox's Journal
March 3, 2021

Whore of the Cultural Wars! . . . Please come CAPTION Tucker Carlson!!!!

Tucker ("I'm worried I left my flame-thrower on at home" ) Carlson is saying: "And now these leftest so-called child protectors say they are worried about negative representations of minority groups in a series of children's books instead of really worrying about child molesters who can't think of anything but children to molest, and harm, and keep down in the basement, and things to do with them. . . . It's so disgusting I can barely think about it, and I don't think about it when I can help it, when it's not keeping me up nights, or polluting my dreams, or slapping me in the face midday when I least expect it, or playing inb the background almost all the time, and getting louder and louder and louder. . . . I'm telling you here and now: these people are twisted!"


(All CAPTIONs at DU are satire in the spirit of SNL and Jonathan Swift.)
February 28, 2021

You're lucky that Moses isn't here. . . . Please come CAPTION Trump's CPAC worshiper!!!

Trump's CPAC worshiper is saying: "Dear Mr. President, I bought your stakes, I went to your university, I sent tens of thousands to build the wall, and now I only have one request: With your magic wand, please, turn me into a frog so my creditors can't find me."
February 25, 2021

Another trip to the time machine. . . . Please come CAPTION ex-Preidented Trump next Sunday at CPAC!

ex-President ("I wrote my tax returns in invisible ink" ) Trump is saying: "Now the fake news is asking me if I'm trying to take over the Republican Party. . . . I am no more trying to take over the Republican Party than trying to take over my living room. . . . Hell, I OWN my living room!!!!"
February 21, 2021

Please come CAPTION ex-PresiDented Trump!!!

Donald (Mulligan-Man) Trump is thinking: "I'm going to floor them at CPAC next Sunday! First, I'll detail all the claims of election fraud, just lay them straight out there pont-by-point. When they hear all of this, they and the entire American people will demand the election results indicate I won and they will collectively demand I immediately re-assume the presidency. And I'll finish by telling them we will show all the evidence for the claims in a few weeks time. No more than three, although I'll be busy presidenting by then, so . . . Hmmm. . . . This is going to work!"
February 18, 2021

"The Pope should make him a saint right now, today!" . . . Please come CAPTION Sean Hannity!

Sean ("Mendacities make me feel right at home" ) Hannity is saying: "What's outrageous, Mr President, and I know you'll agree with me, is that no other cable or national news outlet is running tribute shows to Rush and his great legacy! . . . . Not one!!! . . . They are proving themselves, once again, to be not simply unAmerican, but anti-American!. . . . Surprise, surprise."
February 15, 2021

Trump left a letter in the Resolute Desk for President Biden. . . . Please CAPTION!!!

President Joe Biden is saying "Here's what he wrote, and I quote you:

'Old Sleepy-Eye,

I hope you choke on it, loser.

I'll be back.

Your Better,

President Donald J(ust your wait) Trump

P.s. You're just keeping my seat warm.'"
February 13, 2021

Out to lunch. . . . Please come CAPTION Kevin McCarthy!!!

Kevin ("You're only as good as your turd" ) McCarthy is thinking: "So for saying 'Who the fuck do you think you're talking to?' I had to to take two days off, fly down here to Mar-a-Logo, pick up a $756 dollar lunch tab, scrub down four servant rest-rooms, and fight off two horny sumo wrestlers buck naked in the showers while he watched. . . . Thank God I got off easy!"
February 10, 2021

On the blight side of history. . . . Please come CAPTION ex-PresiDented Trump!!!

ex-PresiDented Trump is saying: "And now I can't even get Kim to answer the phone."
February 7, 2021

"The horror! . . . The horror!" . . . Please come CAPTION Fox's Howard Klurtz!!!

Howard ("Fox won't let me wear my straight-jacket on air" ) Kurtz is saying:"And if you want to see how radically unfair the media can be just look at The Washington Post. . . . By this time four years ago, they had already a fact checker keeping track of President Trump's so called 'misleading claims,' but apparently Joe Biden gets a pass. . . . They haven't even called him a liar once yet. . . . . Whereas disparaging Trump for supposed inaccuracies became a minor industry. . . . By this time in his presidency the Post claimed to have found over 100 such 'lies' in his speeches and both official and off-hand remarks, but by all accounts they haven't even started looking for Biden's lies and prevarications. . . . How's that for bias?"


Above CAPTION is satire based on his conversations with guests 2.7.21.
February 2, 2021

Profiles in Perfidy, XLIV. . . . Please come CAPTION ex-PresiDented Trump!!!

ex-PresiDented Trump is texting: "Great. Getting back to normal. Aides have set up banquet. Guess I'm early. At least I'm back on Twitter. They're letting me type anything in, but for some reason it doesn't seem to be going through. And then, I wonder why no one else is showing up. And why only one place setting. Odd."

Profile Information

Member since: 2002
Number of posts: 19,344

About skip fox

I am retired, now a professor emeritus at University of Louisiana at Lafayette, where I taught in the English department for 37 years. I've written 4 chapbooks and 5 full-sized books (all listed as poetry though many include other genres as well), including _Sheer Indefinite: Selected Poems, 1991-2012 (Univ. of New Orleans Press, 2012). I've also written a 500+ page bibliography of three contemporary poets: Robert Creeley, Ed Dorn, and Robert Duncan. I am writing now, both fiction and poetry, more now than ever. My first vote for President of the United States was for Dick Gregory in 1968 (Bowling Green, Ohio). Favorite quote: "It's easy to be an idealist if you don't have to mind the evidence, but no one said it was supposed to be easy" (Richard LaPauvre).

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