1. A girl once asked me to keep my dorm door unlocked so that she could wake me up in the morning. The next morning she crawled into bed with me, and I couldn't understand why she would come over if she was so tired.

I stayed perfectly still so that she would be able to sleep.

2. A girl once asked to use my shower, and left the door wide open as an invitation. So I thought I'd be a funny guy and throw ice cubes at her.

3. This girl and I were alone in my apartment, and we'd just finished watching a movie. She'd had her head resting on my lap the entire time. Afterwards we were spooning on the couch, she cuddled up against me, kissed me on the cheek, and looked up at me expectantly. I stared at her for a few moments and then said, "So... what do you want to do?" After a while I ended up taking her home.

4. In high school, a girl asked me for a ride home from a football game one time, to which I agreed. She asked if I wanted to come in and see her room (I forget why this seemed like a normal thing), and that it wouldn't bother her parents because they weren't home.

So, I went in and had a tour of her house, then left. I was pretty pissed off when I figured it out a while later.

5. She ordered an ice-cream cone, 'accidentally' smeared it on her cheek, and asked me to get it off. I grabbed the last napkin and wiped it off. Persistent as ever, she 'accidentally' smears ice-cream on her other cheek and politely informs me that I can get it off with my mouth, given our napkin deficit. I just said, "Nah, I hate strawberry", and used my dry elbows to get it off.

In hindsight, I should have used my shirt.

More: http://www.tickld.com/x/jaw/21-oblivious-men-that-are-now-single-for-a-reason