Laelth
Laelth's JournalFor Immediate Release--Magat Boat Captain Fails to Go Down with Ship
ANHC (Antifa Navy High Command)
PORTLAND—09.06.20
A Magat Boat Captain whose vessel was sunk by the Antifa Submarine Fleet in the historic Battle of Lake Travis explains his refusal to accept a life-vest due to his desire to go down with his ship.
https://twitter.com/Terrence_STR/status/1302420793020870656
#Dumbkirk
-Laelth
For Immediate Release--ANTIFA NAVY HIGH COMMAND
PORTLAND—09.06.20
Following our historic victory at the Battle of Lake Travis, the Antifa Navy High Command extends its appreciation and respect to the brave citizen-warriors who participated in the battle and apologizes to the hungry poor whose food banks generously donated all the soup expended in the campaign. Your sacrifice shall not be in vain!
Preliminary casualty lists are being assembled, but we won’t know the full extent of the carnage until the Magats file all of their insurance claims. Magats, obviously, believe in “personal responsibility.” That’s why they are itching to have their insurance companies pick up the tab for their own, reckless stupidity.
More information forthcoming as it becomes available.
-Laelth
The Battle of Lake Travis--a correction (I am in trouble.)
Having posted, earlier today, a theory regarding our overwhelming victory in the Battle of Lake Travis, I was recently contacted by the top brass of the Antifa Navy and “strongly advised” to issue an immediate retraction and correction of my previous announcement on this forum.
I speculated that Seal Team Antifa was responsible for our decimation of the Magat Armada by use of carefully-planted canned-soup mines in the Armada‘s path. I was worng. It was, after all, the Antifa submarine fleet that deserves sole credit for our victory in this historic battle.
Here’s the photographic evidence:
https://twitter.com/wydmindfeersart/status/1302397245648596993
#Dumbkirk
-Laelth
Un-American (new from the Lincoln Project)
https://twitter.com/lilgoldperson/status/1302394410093641729-Laelth
The Battle of Lake Travis--an alternate theory
While it is generally believed that the Antifa submarine fleet is principally responsible for our overwhelming victory in the Battle of Lake Travis, in which the Magat Armada was decimated, new evidence has come to light suggesting that Seal Team Antifa planted canned-soup mines along the Armada’s expected trajectory causing significant damage (and, mercifully, no loss of life). Just utter humiliation.
https://twitter.com/thor_benson/status/1302347154535706624
Scroll down in the Tweet thread to get the Seal Team Antifa theory. Evidently, navy beans work best.
#Dumbkirk
-Laelth
The straw that broke the camel's back.
This is it.
We have often speculated about what it might take to sever Donald Trump from his irrationally-devoted base. Was he right, we wondered, when he said he could shoot someone on 5th Avenue and not lose a single voter? Was he right when he proved he could brag about grabbing women by their genitals and not lose his base? Was he right to assume that lying to the American people—over 20,000 times and counting—wouldn’t cause him to lose his loyal base of support?
For nearly four years it has appeared to us that Trump couldn’t lose his base no matter what he said or did. I think that changed today.
I would be willing to bet that 80% or more of Trump’s supporters (especially the Proud Bois, the Bugaloo Boys, and his vigilante wannabe warriors) are either ex-military, themselves, or closely related to one or more persons who served in the armed forces. What you CAN NOT do to those people is piss on the graves of their honored dead. THAT crosses the line.
Trump was on the right track with these folks when he was defending the statues of their honored dead (their exceptionalist history), but the recently released Atlantic article, unless denied and debunked, paints Trump into a corner that will significantly damage his standing with his militant, white, poorly-educated, and highly-patriotic base.
You can’t call our war heroes losers. You can’t ask why they bothered to fight if there was nothing in it for them. You can’t call them suckers and refuse to honor their sacrifice just because you don’t want to get your hair wet. You especially have no right to hold such beliefs if you are a five-time draft-dodger.
Trump just crossed the line with many of his most devoted supporters, and I imagine that Trump’s support will dwindle SIGNIFICANTLY as a result.
-Laelth
Drink more red wine and green tea.
Get more sun and more Vitamin D. This is super-important. Here’s why:
https://elemental.medium.com/a-supercomputer-analyzed-covid-19-and-an-interesting-new-theory-has-emerged-31cb8eba9d63
Understand the underlying problem. With COVID-19 the problem is bradykinin. The excessive presence of this protein in the body explains nearly all COVID-19 symptoms.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bradykinin
This is a medical breakthrough (discovered only recently) courtesy of American scientists at our federal Oak Ridge laboratories.
-Laelth
My Biden-Harris song. It feels good to listen to this one occasionally.
Enjoy! 
I have “high hopes.”
-Laelth
Lincoln Project Special Report - August 31, 2020
This is a long and specific analysis of the current state of the election from the perspective of The Lincoln Project. It’s well worth watching.
-Laelth
Profile Information
Gender: MaleHometown: Wills Point, TX
Home country: USA
Member since: Sat Oct 16, 2004, 02:36 PM
Number of posts: 32,017
