What to do, what to do...

So I got released from work after two hours and told I will be paid for tomorrow but don't bother showing up.

Which means I am starting my vacation two days early!
Problem is, I don't leave on my cruise until Sunday. I have nothing left to do. Shopping- done. Bills- paid.
I'm going to be bouncing off these walls for the next 3 days.

I am an electrician...

and this is EXACTLY what we think about the other trades.

NSFW!

It's my birthday today...

And so far, only my mom has called me.
Nobody loves me, I guess. I'm 48, a little pudgy, short, and so handsome that women must think I'm attached and out of reach.

(sigh)

Maybe they're planning a surprise party?
At least my boss gave me half the day off with pay. I think I'll take a little nappy-poo.

Urban legend? What do turtle doves and French hens have to do with Christmas? Here's what...

From 1558 to 1829, English Roman Catholics were not permitted to practice their faith openly. Someone during that era wrote this carol as a catechism song for young Catholics. Each verse has a secret meaning known only to the members of the Church.

The partridge in a pear tree refers to Jesus Christ

Two turtle doves were the Old and New Testament

Three french hens refers to faith, hope and love

Four calling birds are the gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John

Five golden rings refers to the Torah, or Law. The first five books of the Old Testament

Six geese a laying recalls the six days of creation

Seven swans a swimming represent the sevenfold gifts of the Holy Spirit-- Prophesy, Serving, Teaching, Exhortation, Contribution, Leadership and Mercy

The eight maids a milking were the eight beatitudes

Nine ladies dancing were the nine fruits of the Holy Spirit-- love, peace, joy, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control

Ten lords a leaping are the ten Commandments

Eleven pipers pipng stood for the eleven faithful Disciples

Twelve drummers drumming symbolizes the twelve points of belief in the Apostles' Creed




And so friends, that is your history, or trivia, lesson for the day. It was shared with me and I found it interesting and enlightening to know how a strange song became a Christmas Carol and now I share it with you.

Merry Twelve Days of Christmas Everyone.

A PSA about celebrating during the season...

I would like to share an experience with you all about drinking and driving.
I'm sure some of you have had brushes with the law after leaving a social gathering during this time of year. Last night I was out with friends at a bar and had a coupla three of four too many Crown Royals and beer. Knowing full well that I might be slightly over the limit, I decided to take a bus home.
Sure enough we came up to a roadblock but since it was a bus we were waived right through. Well, I arrived home without incident, which was a real surprise because I have never driven a bus before and I'm not exactly sure where I got it.

If you know or hear about anybody missing a bus, please PM me so I can arrange its return.


Thanks in advance and Merry Christmas everyone!

Funny Stuff...Sal Monella. Twas the Night Before Christmas...

I hate when the wind shifts...

I live near a dairy farm and an orchard and when the wind changes I get to smell this big pile of cow shit between the two properties. It seems the dairy farmer is upset that the fruit farmer is stealing all his shit to use as fertilizer. They fight a lot, I guess. All I know is that pile of shit sure stinks up the place when the wind shifts.

BUTTERBALL IS RECALLING TURKEYS...

According to reports from around the country, the Butterball Turkey farm is recalling all turkeys dated after November 12, 2013 because some idiot forgot to butter the balls.

Yes folks, it's my one Thanksgiving Day joke, and it's a groaner, I know.
Just one of the many services I provide to my friends here at DU. I'm here all week.

Bills vs. Dolphins... Anybody know the point spread?

I'm going to the game tomorrow.

A capella

Africa by TOTO