cyclonefence
cyclonefence's JournalAn earworm
I have inflicted on myself this morning, which I share in the hope of ridding myself of it:
They named the baby Voldemort.
You're welcome.
I probably have breast cancer (again)
About a week ago, I noticed a bloody discharge from my nipple on the breast where I'd had cancer in 2012. Ironically, I was just "aged out" of my annual oncologist's office visit. My pcp sent me for a diagnostic mammogram and ultrasound, and for the first time ever in my experience, the radiologist came out immediately and wanted to make sure I had an appointment to see a breast surgeon. My last mammogram was last February and was clear, and now I apparently have a largish mass. I've had a hell of a time scheduling first the ultrasound--ended up going to another facility--and now getting an appointment with the breast surgeon. The wonderful surgeon who gave me my lumpectomy last time has moved out of state, so I'm starting over.
I am not worried about the cancer. If I'm reading the NIH statistics correctly, there's a 93% survival after five years rate, and I weathered surgery, chemo and radiation just fine last time. My concern now is antsiness, waiting for the process to start. I tried to call for an appointment on Friday, but the lines were so busy I had to leave my number, to be called back "on the next business day," which it has recently occurred to me is Tuesday, not Monday. I'm going nuts with the uncertainty and waiting. I want to sleep until Tuesday.
My other concern, a much more important one, is for my husband. He is so worried about me. He carries the real burden of my treatment, when it comes, and I don't know what to do to help him feel better. My job is easy, once the process starts: I do what they tell me to. It's out of my hands, and I'm not afraid. But no one tells him what to do, and I know he is afraid. We have been married 49 years, and this will be my third cancer (the second was kidney), so the poor man has had to go through this twice before. For various reasons (mostly unwanted advice from nutcase cousins) we agree not to tell anyone in the family until we have to--i.e. if I lose my hair--but I'm going to tell him I want him to talk to his friends about it, if he wants to. I don't care about people knowing I have cancer; it's just that I don't want to be put into the position again of having to be kind to crazy people while I feel weak.
If anyone has suggestions, I'd love to hear them. Otherwise, I just need a place to vent.
Update on my Navage experience
Some weeks ago, I posted about my newly-acquired Navage device, which had been suggested by my ENT as a last resort before more sinus surgery. I was having trouble making it work properly, getting gallons of salt water into my mouth. Several kind folks responded with suggestions, all of them encouraging me to keep at it. I really was on the verge of returning it for a refund.
Well, I did stick with it, and eventually it worked! It washed a gratifying amount of gunk from my sinuses into the reservoir. But the next time, I had the same problem with water going into my mouth. But then it worked again! I finally noticed that it made a difference--although it shouldn't--which side of the nose piece went into which nostril. If I put the sucking part of the nose piece into my right nostril, I get flooded; if I put it into the left nostril, it works like a charm.
I don't know if this will help anyone else having trouble learning to use this device, but it's worth a try before you give up. As I say, it shouldn't make a difference, but apparently my nasal anatomy is such that I have to use it this way, and maybe someone else does, too.
Mostly, I want to thank those of you who encouraged me. Use of this device has made an immense difference. I know I have infection because of the color and thickness of the mucus I expel, but I don't feel ill and have not had to go back on antibiotics since I started using the Navage. It seems that as long as I can keep my sinuses cleared out, the infection can't take hold. These weeks are the longest I've been this summer without having to go to the doctor or use antibiotics/prednisone, and I am delighted.
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Member since: Mon Dec 5, 2016, 05:05 PMNumber of posts: 4,483
