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Response to SQUEE (Reply #45)

Sun Mar 17, 2019, 09:14 PM

56. I'm sorry. Someone has to be vile, I am finding out where I lie, finding out how to be horrible

I'm watching my personal beliefs and personal philosophical values get turned into ad hominem attacks and conspiracy theories by the other party, by white nationalists, by this administration for a while and so this has been boiling up inside of me. It exploded.

I went too far, but it's clear I have to be that vile, horrible person. Not all of us can be nice and sweet, I am willing to be that person who screams in ears. And yet I find I am lashing out at people who would probably be my allies, and it's not necessarily political, I actually made a grown man cry out in the 'real world' just the other day, mind you they harassed one of my coworkers. And here I am, I feel like their suffering and dying is depersonalized and just put out in the world for display, like they didn't matter.

And I'm coming from a special place in another way though, I've semi-adopted a young Somali woman, and every time I hear or see news about this, I think about her. And that's not even mentioning the fact that I almost married a Muslim woman a long time ago, she still holds a very special place in my heart, and then to see them called invaders when they are of the two of the sweetest and strongest women in my life. It's made it worse, to see this gaslighting and psychological manipulation of my political and philosophical beliefs, now they go after people I love? No.

You do what you have to do, I'll do what I have to do. But it starts here, the pushback against this poison, this virus starts today. I will have to temper how I act, and redirect it. Because I am finding out I am getting a lot done...

Just one of the things I am doing is working on a project somewhere else, there wasn't a thing on white nationalist terrorism until today, I've added hundreds of pages and including code words and sundown towns, it's being called an "incident" according to the administrators, hopefully it will remain. I think it's a better and smarter use of my time than being angry at fellow DUers.

I want to be horrible, but I need to be horrible at the right people. And that wasn't you.

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ck4829 Mar 2019 OP
nitpicker Mar 2019 #1
ck4829 Mar 2019 #3
Iggo Mar 2019 #2
ck4829 Mar 2019 #4
localroger Mar 2019 #35
Hekate Mar 2019 #41
Mariana Mar 2019 #42
Blue_true Mar 2019 #53
Post removed Mar 2019 #5
ck4829 Mar 2019 #6
pintobean Mar 2019 #7
ck4829 Mar 2019 #10
nitpicker Mar 2019 #8
LuvNewcastle Mar 2019 #9
SammyWinstonJack Mar 2019 #11
Raster Mar 2019 #12
CTAtheist Mar 2019 #13
ck4829 Mar 2019 #14
CTAtheist Mar 2019 #15
ck4829 Mar 2019 #16
CTAtheist Mar 2019 #17
ck4829 Mar 2019 #20
CTAtheist Mar 2019 #21
ck4829 Mar 2019 #23
CTAtheist Mar 2019 #27
ck4829 Mar 2019 #29
Rainbow Droid Mar 2019 #33
ck4829 Mar 2019 #34
UpInArms Mar 2019 #25
Dave Starsky Mar 2019 #36
SQUEE Mar 2019 #37
ck4829 Mar 2019 #38
SQUEE Mar 2019 #45
LineLineLineLineLineLineNew Reply I'm sorry. Someone has to be vile, I am finding out where I lie, finding out how to be horrible
ck4829 Mar 2019 #56
cwydro Mar 2019 #40
ck4829 Mar 2019 #39
Chin music Mar 2019 #18
exboyfil Mar 2019 #19
ck4829 Mar 2019 #22
redstatebluegirl Mar 2019 #24
malaise Mar 2019 #26
dewsgirl Mar 2019 #28
stonecutter357 Mar 2019 #30
Tipperary Mar 2019 #31
ck4829 Mar 2019 #32
flotsam Mar 2019 #43
Turin_C3PO Mar 2019 #44
backscatter712 Mar 2019 #46
dumbcat Mar 2019 #47
canetoad Mar 2019 #48
Cold War Spook Mar 2019 #49
Initech Mar 2019 #50
PoindexterOglethorpe Mar 2019 #51
treestar Mar 2019 #52
ADX Mar 2019 #54
bitterross Mar 2019 #55
Arazi Mar 2019 #57
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