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In reply to the discussion: I want to know how you get permission to touch someone. [View all]milestogo
(16,829 posts)132. When in doubt, don't touch.
You can always ask. If you are just meeting someone or haven't spent much time talking to them, its usually not going to be welcomed.
If you are getting to know someone romantically, definitely ask. It will be appreciated. And then you will get a reading on where things stand.
An accidental touch on the back or the shoulder is usually not going to be a big deal. I am a female and last week my male co-worker put his hand on my back in a friendly, non-sexual way. I wasn't upset or offended, and I pretty much got the idea that he did it without remembering that I was his co-worker and not his little sister. Not a problem. And if he runs for office a few years from now I won't come forward. Even if he's a Republican.
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i hugged my sister too hard once, she got a bruise and called the cops on me...
samnsara
Mar 2019
#1
Hey I told you I felt bad about how I used to think ... it was a long time ago ...
mr_lebowski
Mar 2019
#118
You don't have to ask me. You can sidle up to me at the bar, plant a peck on my cheek
mr_lebowski
Mar 2019
#30
Suppose I said yes, it wouldn't much matter ... esp. if I was at a downtown SF bar, which I've been
mr_lebowski
Mar 2019
#69
Joe Biden definitely needs to up his sensitivity level towards this subject, no question ...
mr_lebowski
Mar 2019
#123
"I'd rather live in a world where a the default attitude of a spontaneous touch is considered a form
WhiskeyGrinder
Mar 2019
#24
When someone "spontaneously touches" numerous people over and over, it's not spontaneously touching
SFnomad
Mar 2019
#82
"I'd rather live in a world where a the default attitude of a spontaneous touch is considered....
LAS14
Apr 2019
#142
Yours is the only reply that I think honestly answered the original poster's question.
arthurgoodwin
Mar 2019
#73
Some people - and I'm one of them - prefer not to be embraced or touched
The Velveteen Ocelot
Mar 2019
#11
I have met Al Franken previously and wouldn't be *offended* if he put his arm around me.
The Velveteen Ocelot
Mar 2019
#119
Try an experiment. Come up ftom behind a female coworker at the water cooler, put your hands on.
CentralMass
Mar 2019
#16
But you do understand there are STILL a LOT of men who say they are "confused"
TexasBushwhacker
Mar 2019
#63
That might be because you have a certain attitude about someone touching you ...
mr_lebowski
Mar 2019
#92
Or "Groundhog Day." The same conversation over and over and over. It isn't hard for most
Squinch
Mar 2019
#101
Each person has a right to their own boundaries. That seems so obvious to me that
lilactime
Mar 2019
#27
Here's a good idea. Don't touch a woman unless she is a close family member or invites
Autumn
Mar 2019
#29
I guess you could hand the person a form with boxes next to different types of kissing ond touching.
Cold War Spook
Mar 2019
#35
Yes. That is a perfectly measured response to the fact that a woman expressed an objection
Squinch
Mar 2019
#104
These threads have taught me that there are some truly creepy guys on this board.
Tipperary
Mar 2019
#102
Oh my God! How will you survive all the confusion!!! A woman DOESN'T want a stranger to
Squinch
Mar 2019
#107