General Discussion
In reply to the discussion: OK, DUers- I need advice, and this is not a political post [View all]VOX
(22,976 posts)I do not mean to sound heartless or cruel. I admire you, trying to do the right thing for those close to you. And I do not mean to speak down to you, eitherfar from it.
There have been numerous excellent suggestions upthread regarding treatment programs, etc. Drugs or alcohol, it makes no difference the problem is serious addiction.
There is one major caution that addiction-treatment professionals will tell family members, as harsh as it is: You cannot help the addicts themselves. You cannot involve yourself in their problems arising from their addiction(s); if you do, you become enmeshed in their entire drama and it can take you down. Of course, point them towards help, but if theyre unwilling to seek treatment, you cannot push them. In fact, as theyre adults, you have to be willing to let them go, and they will either rise or fall based on their own efforts. You cannot do it for them, or even attempt to do so.
Again, I know this all may sound cold-hearted, but its a standard point in Al-Anon and other groups. You cannot intervene or take on their manifold problems stemming from addiction. All you can do is point the way and let them go.
All best to you