General Discussion

DFW

(56,693 posts)

79. Everyone will view this question through their own life's lens.

Sun Oct 13, 2024, 04:00 PM

Oct 13

My wife and I had two daughters, and waited until we were 30 to do it, so we could have some decent time to ourselves, and not regret the time-out for child-raising. My wife shouldered most of the burden, since my job requires constant travel. Even so, I took more time out than most working dads can (nature of my job), and we're pretty happy with how our two daughters turned out. They, in turn, now also have two children each (ZPG), and all four of them are quite special. The oldest is six, and all four are at least bi-lingual, partially tri-lingual.

But you HAVE to want it. If you don't, then don't. Don't let anyone or any community pressure you into wanting something you don't want. I hope there is a special playce in hell for those who would deny an abortion to a woman or girl who is the victim of rape or incest. Whoever says, " God wanted that" is the cruelest kind of liar. Probably even the rapist didn't specifically want that. So don't force the victim to change the rest of her life because of it. The should be the right of nobody.

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I never wanted kids [View all] XanaDUer2 Oct 13 OP

Very sound reasoning Mossfern Oct 13 #1

I saw employees w kids struggling XanaDUer2 Oct 13 #2

So you saw some families too poor to have children? It was "Not worth it"? That your decision for the Wonder Why Oct 13 #17

If someone wants kids, they're free to make XanaDUer2 Oct 13 #27

Time to walk the walk.... raising2moredems Oct 13 #110

This message was self-deleted by its author Mosby Oct 13 #11

Yes it is, and its killing the planet Evolve Dammit Oct 13 #12

This message was self-deleted by its author Mosby Oct 13 #23

Arable land per head of population canetoad Oct 13 #77

Arable land Cirsium Oct 13 #91

Yeah, you ARE wrong. Sky Jewels Oct 13 #84

Her comment was actually that she supported 3 of her 4 children's decision not to have children Jmb 4 Harris-Walz Oct 13 #16

Thank you Mossfern Oct 13 #61

It was perfectly clear. I had no trouble understanding it. niyad Oct 13 #104

It absolutely is. Jirel Oct 13 #21

This message was self-deleted by its author Mosby Oct 13 #24

Aw, you can't even argue the point. Jirel Oct 13 #35

I agree biophile Oct 13 #40

This message was self-deleted by its author Mosby Oct 13 #89

You are allowed your opinion biophile Oct 13 #39

It is not that Cirsium Oct 13 #54

I see the truth in that biophile Oct 13 #74

Thanks n/t Cirsium Oct 13 #83

"We are living in a time when a highly destructive economic system dominates everything." OldBaldy1701E Oct 13 #80

Thank you for your post. Collimator Oct 13 #86

We are indeed overpopulated Envirogal Oct 13 #103

Thanks Cirsium Oct 14 #114

you sound like a bot 4catsmom Oct 13 #82

This message was self-deleted by its author Mosby Oct 13 #90

Most of the damage Cirsium Oct 13 #37

True biophile Oct 13 #41

Population is what leads to all you mentioned. Envirogal Oct 14 #115

Excellent points Cirsium Oct 14 #120

You cannot point to any social problem bluescribbler Oct 13 #46

Women's rights Cirsium Oct 13 #85

I am NOT tellilng my kids not to have children Mossfern Oct 13 #58

Just a terrible response krkaufman Oct 13 #72

Of course the planet is overpopulated. Sky Jewels Oct 13 #81

I just think things are getting too dangerous and ugly. kerry-is-my-prez Oct 13 #48

I've never for even one moment moreland01 Oct 13 #87

I never wanted children either. FalloutShelter Oct 13 #3

I was also the one not intested in holding the baby XanaDUer2 Oct 13 #5

Same FalloutShelter Oct 13 #6

The smell of baby powder XanaDUer2 Oct 13 #8

My sisters and my mom understood I_UndergroundPanther Oct 13 #67

And that's your right XanaDUer2 Oct 13 #68

You are so right! Mossfern Oct 13 #7

So glad your mothering experience has FalloutShelter Oct 13 #20

I can relate! birdographer Oct 13 #15

Same here. Somebody shows up with a baby, the best I can do Ocelot II Oct 13 #34

Show up with a baby I_UndergroundPanther Oct 13 #70

I have had to quietly leave the room in those circumstances. Demobrat Oct 13 #75

Somebody has to care for the animals! moreland01 Oct 13 #88

Yep - I was the same. "Do not ask me to hold the baby" was what I'd think. kerry-is-my-prez Oct 13 #51

Were you able to pursue your artitic goals? electric_blue68 Oct 13 #94

Yes, I have.... FalloutShelter Oct 13 #98

YW👍 Wow, that's great! ... electric_blue68 Oct 14 #116

I love babies. Just never wanted any of my own. Iris Oct 13 #111

I always wanted kids & to be an artist womanofthehills Oct 14 #113

Every woman has the right to make her own decisions. Diamond_Dog Oct 13 #4

A VERY SPECIAL kind of POS. calimary Oct 13 #18

Can't blame you one bit. I had none (purposefully) for the same reasons! n/t CousinIT Oct 13 #9

It's grossly sexist that Vance and Republicans think Quiet Em Oct 13 #10

It's your freedom to decide - the government shouldn't have any control over our reproductive systems...NONE. Told iluvtennis Oct 13 #13

Absolutely XanaDUer2 Oct 13 #28

I have to ask KT2000 Oct 13 #14

Because he wants to have cheap and uneducated manpower for corporations manpower. Take away good Jmb 4 Harris-Walz Oct 13 #22

I wonder if he saw the new series on the Menendez brothers... birdographer Oct 13 #19

I'm a childless dog lady 😂 Jmb 4 Harris-Walz Oct 13 #29

These superstorms and raging fires XanaDUer2 Oct 13 #33

Just for clarity misanthrope Oct 13 #105

Churches have convinced some women that TBF Oct 13 #25

I never wanted kids either. In fact, I most vehemently Demobrat Oct 13 #26

I like your name Demobrat! nt Jmb 4 Harris-Walz Oct 13 #30

Id be given babydolls as a very young child XanaDUer2 Oct 13 #36

I was given a babydoll once. Demobrat Oct 13 #49

Lolol! XanaDUer2 Oct 13 #50

Are you my daughter? Mossfern Oct 13 #65

I'm the oldest of four. The first time I remember Demobrat Oct 13 #66

Different daughter Mossfern Oct 13 #69

Agree. Jirel Oct 13 #31

I don't think you should knock motherhood as being uninteresting. LisaM Oct 13 #95

nothing more interesting to do? that's just ugly NoRethugFriends Oct 13 #107

What woman votes for vermin like him and Trump? piddyprints Oct 13 #32

Like I said, coworkers XanaDUer2 Oct 13 #38

I love kids but having my own was never a priority. Siwsan Oct 13 #42

I knew I could not handle working XanaDUer2 Oct 13 #43

Married 54 years this week. Two daughters who I des ribe as the best thing.... EarnestPutz Oct 13 #44

Kids are annoying I_UndergroundPanther Oct 13 #45

Looking at active 55-plus condos XanaDUer2 Oct 13 #47

I can't stand the screeching either. Demobrat Oct 13 #56

Wow. Such anti children sentiment in this stream. NoRethugFriends Oct 13 #52

I agree. It seems like some of the people who didn't have children have a sense of moral superiority about it. llmart Oct 13 #60

Don't feel morally superior I_UndergroundPanther Oct 22 #122

Just being honest I_UndergroundPanther Oct 22 #121

here's a really good discussion with a woman who got off the maga train barbtries Oct 13 #53

Ty nt XanaDUer2 Oct 13 #55

We never had 'em, never wanted them. 634-5789 Oct 13 #57

Lol XanaDUer2 Oct 13 #59

I never thought I was responsible enough to have kids. And I was right. Iggo Oct 13 #62

Sorry. Ended up long post, but I needed to get it off my chest. Please forgive me. slightlv Oct 13 #63

Ty for sharing XanaDUer2 Oct 13 #64

I have a sister like your daughter. Demobrat Oct 13 #78

Love your last sentence! (LOL) slightlv Oct 13 #97

I think I_UndergroundPanther Oct 22 #123

I tend to agree to at least a genetic predisposition. slightlv Oct 22 #124

the pressure for people to have kids very much contributes to abuse Skittles Oct 13 #71

I'm my 20s XanaDUer2 Oct 13 #73

Me too. He was wrong. I didn't. Demobrat Oct 13 #76

Everyone will view this question through their own life's lens. DFW Oct 13 #79

When I was around 4 yrs 7ish wks old; I knew... electric_blue68 Oct 13 #92

Circa 72 XanaDUer2 Oct 13 #93

My sis wasn't screaming. Maaaybe a brief look, really not sure...but, ugh, the smell! electric_blue68 Oct 13 #96

What woman votes for Trump? One who hates people of color more than she loves herself. SunSeeker Oct 13 #99

Me neither for about the same reasons. I also lack tolerance of people slow to sinkingfeeling Oct 13 #100

I'm not the only one in my family without children. no_hypocrisy Oct 13 #101

Same. Have them if you want, but it was never a high priority to me. D23MIURG23 Oct 13 #102

The same here, both for the population and wage slave reasons, but also niyad Oct 13 #106

Hear, hear. peppertree Oct 13 #108

I dont know Figarosmom Oct 13 #109

Didn't even have choice in the matter. Xolodno Oct 13 #112

Religious fanatics who seem to be so insecure of their own agency they need a cult figure with a "Bible" msfiddlestix Oct 14 #117

Strong supporter of women's rights to have or not have children! Clouds Passing Oct 14 #118

OMG DU is full of childless catladies! jfz9580m Oct 14 #119