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R B Garr

(16,920 posts)
51. You've pretty much made the cops case for them by illustrating the decisions they face themselves
Fri Apr 26, 2013, 03:18 PM
Apr 2013

Your posts on this thread are very insightful, and I see why, as you are a survivor and a counselor and very knowledgeable. But it seems police forces are trying to extricate themselves from the decision-making processes you are describing here and going instead with the very basic and well-documented dynamics of domestic violence. I'm no expert by any means, but I think we all know some of the basics about DV: it always escalates and is usually based in alcohol/substance abuse and/or long-term life patterns of abuse often based in childhood.

It seems like the police are not willing to keep responding to the same dynamics involving the same individuals without upping the ante on them, if you will. By giving the situation a couple responses and then seeing the same situation arise for a third time, I guess they are deeming the problem so entrenched that police response is not the answer at that point. The police need to escalate it themselves by bringing in other resources of their own, such as court procedures. In the long run, this woman will be better served by dealing with the root issues that kept her there in the first place for such violence than in keeping herself in a situation where she is being stabbed in the neck.

This is ridiculous Drale Apr 2013 #1
It doesn't sound like they were together, except in abuso-jerk's mind. politicat Apr 2013 #4
Did she press charges? FarCenter Apr 2013 #7
Easy questions for us to ask Kelvin Mace Apr 2013 #9
How true. Lady Freedom Returns Apr 2013 #73
Very few men know what it is like to be genuinely Kelvin Mace Apr 2013 #75
And that is one of the things that worry me about this law. Lady Freedom Returns Apr 2013 #78
I guess that's what the first two strikes were for kudzu22 Apr 2013 #2
And even before she called police the first time, R B Garr Apr 2013 #5
There are always signs. lapislzi Apr 2013 #10
This message was self-deleted by its author CreekDog Apr 2013 #56
What I was commenting on was the police response and their policy R B Garr Apr 2013 #70
blame the victim of domestic violence on the person getting hit/punched/killed CreekDog Apr 2013 #34
K&R Solly Mack Apr 2013 #3
Saddened and dismayed by the responses on this thread. lapislzi Apr 2013 #6
You speak soothly Kelvin Mace Apr 2013 #8
I would suspect... MoonchildCA Apr 2013 #45
In addition to "Think...." I'd add "Listen. Empathize." Gormy Cuss Apr 2013 #49
One of the things I always say to people: lapislzi Apr 2013 #52
If the police are at the same place.... NCTraveler Apr 2013 #11
Go where? Kelvin Mace Apr 2013 #12
I fully agree with this part. NCTraveler Apr 2013 #16
what you're saying is if the perp gets in trouble, his victims need to be evicted CreekDog Apr 2013 #35
I never said such a thing. NCTraveler Apr 2013 #37
so you're saying you don't want to kick them out but want them evicted CreekDog Apr 2013 #39
I think you are confused. NCTraveler Apr 2013 #41
this is your position, quoted verbatim, it sounds like you don't want to take responsibility for it: CreekDog Apr 2013 #44
Once again, you are confused. NCTraveler Apr 2013 #47
I am going to step to the defense of NCTraveler. lapislzi Apr 2013 #50
You defend someone who took a position you call amoral? Dumb. CreekDog Apr 2013 #59
Wut? lapislzi Apr 2013 #64
You're bending over backwards to defend someone who is calling for these people to be evicted CreekDog Apr 2013 #71
DV is a community issue lapislzi Apr 2013 #74
You're missing one subtle but critical point. KamaAina Apr 2013 #72
Oh, I get it. lapislzi Apr 2013 #77
go where? she doesn't care, not one bit. well, she cares about the landlord and neighbors CreekDog Apr 2013 #69
Yeah, let's just make the children forced to witness said violence homeless. strategery blunder Apr 2013 #14
I am not talking about the children in the home. NCTraveler Apr 2013 #18
The threat of eviction deters victims from seeking help. strategery blunder Apr 2013 #19
I do grasp what you are saying. NCTraveler Apr 2013 #24
It's generally going to be the abuser who is breaking the terms of the lease... strategery blunder Apr 2013 #29
Think about what you just said. lapislzi Apr 2013 #15
Incorrect. NCTraveler Apr 2013 #17
The biggest effect is on the victim lapislzi Apr 2013 #20
I like everything that you have posted here. NCTraveler Apr 2013 #30
Points taken, all. lapislzi Apr 2013 #33
these laws are an abomination noiretextatique Apr 2013 #22
The first amendment has nothing to do with her renting a piece of private land. NCTraveler Apr 2013 #25
Redress of grievances. lapislzi Apr 2013 #27
Ummm, "...and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances." TheMadMonk Apr 2013 #38
You hear domestic violence and your top worry is $$$ and private property CreekDog Apr 2013 #61
Once again, you are not understanding. NCTraveler Apr 2013 #65
WTF? here's the 1st amendment issue...from the article that you did not read noiretextatique Apr 2013 #79
Read it and understand it. NCTraveler Apr 2013 #80
Oooh, that looks like fun. Can I put the boot to the defenceless too? TheMadMonk Apr 2013 #21
I know your question is rhetorical, but there are possible answers. lapislzi Apr 2013 #23
Why shouldn't it be? Cops don't require that corpse lodge a complaint. TheMadMonk Apr 2013 #32
No argument, but sometimes that's the way it goes down. lapislzi Apr 2013 #36
Ignoring the rest of you post, this is spot on. NCTraveler Apr 2013 #26
I'm sure they are. lapislzi Apr 2013 #28
You've pretty much made the cops case for them by illustrating the decisions they face themselves R B Garr Apr 2013 #51
Now if only we had a safety net. lapislzi Apr 2013 #53
I am and have been talking about the way that things are today. NCTraveler Apr 2013 #57
You're giving me an idea =) lapislzi Apr 2013 #60
It is a very good idea. And one I believe many legislators would get behind in many states. NCTraveler Apr 2013 #62
^^^why I love DU^^^ lapislzi Apr 2013 #67
You make a good point about a safety net and this seems like an extreme case R B Garr Apr 2013 #68
So the ofspring of such a woman should be deemed lost... TheMadMonk Apr 2013 #54
I don't feel it should be that way. NCTraveler Apr 2013 #55
How about just the violent tenant? KamaAina Apr 2013 #40
The people on the lease are evicted. All parties. NCTraveler Apr 2013 #42
Yes, but that doesn't make it right. KamaAina Apr 2013 #43
No. It is not right. NCTraveler Apr 2013 #46
You say it's not right but you argue for it here CreekDog Apr 2013 #63
You continue to be dishonest about my position. NCTraveler Apr 2013 #66
Of course it isn't right. lapislzi Apr 2013 #58
because nothing solves a person's problems quite like evicting them 0rganism Apr 2013 #13
I have read all the comments. Kalidurga Apr 2013 #31
Domestic violence calls are the most dangerous for zeeland Apr 2013 #48
That is their job. Lady Freedom Returns Apr 2013 #76
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