General Discussion

haele

(12,629 posts)

66. Isn't a legal marriage a contract that needs to be signed and witnessed?

Thu Jun 27, 2013, 03:20 PM

Jun 2013

I can see joke marriages where someone prints up a certificate saying they married their dog or box turtle, but ain't no way a county clerk who's job depends on taxpayer dollars is going to accept a pawprint on an official, noterized state document...

As for the IRS accepting John and Fluffy (with no social security number or official birth certificate) Smith as "married" for tax purposes due to no DOMA? Did it ever happen before DOMA in the 200+ years of United States history?

Gimme a break.

Haele

Edit history

Please sign in to view edit histories.

203 replies

= new reply since forum marked as read

Highlight:

Rand Paul: "Humans Will Marry Non Humans Without DOMA" [View all] Initech Jun 2013 OP

They are so perverted. Democracyinkind Jun 2013 #1

I know, I always find it hilarious that they're the first ones to bring it up. Initech Jun 2013 #11

Not just the first, but basically the only ones. Democracyinkind Jun 2013 #12

Remember Bush's 'human-animal hybrids' SOTU speech? leftstreet Jun 2013 #19

OMG, I almost forgot about that. Such a WTF? moment! n/t freeplessinseattle Jun 2013 #152

Well, it held them hide the fact that they don't have an actual argument against gay marriage Fortinbras Armstrong Jun 2013 #189

But somebody married him, didn't they? What's the diff? nt kelliekat44 Jun 2013 #62

Started my day off with a laugh, thanks! freshwest Jun 2013 #190

If cats and dogs and vegetables all have higher IQs than conservatives- eridani Jun 2013 #165

:-/ trusty elf Jun 2013 #171

Wow. Democracyinkind Jun 2013 #172

Oh no...........You mean people will start marrying Republicans!!!!! faithnomore Jun 2013 #186

He has been waiting for this... Half-Century Man Jun 2013 #2

I hope Rand and his ewe LibertyLover Jun 2013 #4

That's sexist.. Half-Century Man Jun 2013 #9

A Ram? Xyzse Jun 2013 #24

Rainbow colored world. Half-Century Man Jun 2013 #26

Cool beans Xyzse Jun 2013 #31

A ram, huh? So you're saying that for Rand... Moonwalk Jun 2013 #127

Ewe made me leave my happy home...... Half-Century Man Jun 2013 #141

I love ewe. Brewinblue Jun 2013 #64

ewwwwwwwwww dixiegrrrrl Jun 2013 #14

He represents the tea party, which are sheep. Initech Jun 2013 #20

And end up disgraced, on the street, in shabby clothes... longship Jun 2013 #150

Aqualung Half-Century Man Jun 2013 #159

Or Aqua Buddha? freshwest Jun 2013 #191

He should support that. Wait Wut Jun 2013 #3

Here here (pic) Amonester Jun 2013 #138

maybe he might but i was not planning on it dembotoz Jun 2013 #5

The bride/groom might have a problem with the "I do" part unless it's a parrot. Tierra_y_Libertad Jun 2013 #6

The mind boggles at the thought of wedding gifts. Scratching post? Doggie bowl? Tierra_y_Libertad Jun 2013 #7

Sheep shears jmowreader Jun 2013 #155

So can I marry my cat now? - n/t fleur-de-lisa Jun 2013 #8

What are you waiting for Politicalboi Jun 2013 #35

Doesn't look to be over 18; did you get her parents' consent? FarCenter Jun 2013 #56

In fairness, an 18-year-old cat would be pretty damn old. Eligible for Kitty Social Security. nomorenomore08 Jun 2013 #199

Congrats! fleur-de-lisa Jun 2013 #63

Can I marry my three cats? The Velveteen Ocelot Jun 2013 #82

I vote, Yes! Then I can marry my 3 too! freeplessinseattle Jun 2013 #153

I could never let Rand have the run of the farm. yellerpup Jun 2013 #10

He knows that some animals are more equal than others Hekate Jun 2013 #36

Equal or not, Rand finds them hot. yellerpup Jun 2013 #42

DUZY for sure! - nt HardTimes99 Jun 2013 #45

Didn't Liza Minnelli do that already? n/t RZM Jun 2013 #69

That entire family is full of fucking tools Dash87 Jun 2013 #13

Well, someone did marry HIM REP Jun 2013 #15

We know jackasses (Republicans) are copulating with human females - IdaBriggs Jun 2013 #16

Uh, the jackass is the Democratic symbol. aquart Jun 2013 #103

fine, troglodytes are marrying human females and producing republicans Nanjing to Seoul Jun 2013 #143

Urk - so much for that analogy! Lol! IdaBriggs Jun 2013 #182

Yes - in fact, I find myself strangely attracted to my Tupperware. closeupready Jun 2013 #17

I'm personally raising purple cabbages as mail-order brides struggle4progress Jun 2013 #168

I lust after trees. I'll give up being monogamous for this. freshwest Jun 2013 #192

Wait, I thought he was a Libertarian Ligyron Jun 2013 #18

Exactly LostOne4Ever Jun 2013 #161

For many right-wing types Fortinbras Armstrong Jun 2013 #196

Because that happened before DOMA, right? magellan Jun 2013 #21

But only in America ornotna Jun 2013 #174

Is he saying I might marry a GOP supporter? n-t Logical Jun 2013 #22

And someone told me Snowden agrees with Paul! wtmusic Jun 2013 #23

Snowden gave Ron Paul money. baldguy Jun 2013 #25

That proves it...Snowden hates gays. wtmusic Jun 2013 #28

Given that he's a RW libertarian douchebag, I wouldn't be surprised if Snowden was anti-gay. baldguy Jun 2013 #34

I'm going to put all that stuff in the email. wtmusic Jun 2013 #40

Love the fact that you have no clue about Snowdens objectives, but still support him anyway. baldguy Jun 2013 #41

His objectives are unimportant to me. wtmusic Jun 2013 #43

"... substantial risk to his own life..." So, Obama is activly trying to get him assasinated? baldguy Jun 2013 #79

No, you're naive. wtmusic Jun 2013 #88

RIIIIIIIIGHT! baldguy Jun 2013 #94

LMAO iamthebandfanman Jun 2013 #184

"...someones intent of doing an action is different than their facial features or looks" wtmusic Jun 2013 #188

I get it now. Whether or not I think our national security state is a good idea-- eridani Jun 2013 #167

OMG! Was Snowden's ex actually a 'stuffed animal' ballerina? leftstreet Jun 2013 #29

A "stuffed animal pole dancer" is probably more accurate. wtmusic Jun 2013 #30

Not sure I'd want to see the safe search turned off on this one. Initech Jun 2013 #44

That hasn't proven the case in Canada. PDJane Jun 2013 #27

But what about mooses? eridani Jun 2013 #166

Frankly, inter-species matings aren't my problem, either. PDJane Jun 2013 #187

Hey Medea Benjamin do u still STAND WITH RAND? alp227 Jun 2013 #32

Too late! Sister Sarah has already married and replicated several drone clones. Major Hogwash Jun 2013 #33

What's going on inside Rand Paul's brain, translated... (May be NSFW) hunter Jun 2013 #37

I was thinking this: Initech Jun 2013 #47

That's disgusting! And funny! And weird! randome Jun 2013 #48

Maybe, but I've yet to find a cow that REALLY understands me. Buns_of_Fire Jun 2013 #38

Cows are such bullheaded creatures. Nanjing to Seoul Jun 2013 #144

Wait, what ??? janlyn Jun 2013 #39

The leading cause of poverty OnionPatch Jun 2013 #65

+10000 janlyn Jun 2013 #68

Exactly what I was thinking! Just mind-boggling n/t freeplessinseattle Jun 2013 #156

Gone shopping for a bridal gown now: UTUSN Jun 2013 #46

+10000 JDPriestly Jun 2013 #96

And they call it puppy love............ lunasun Jun 2013 #121

Well, will those 'non-humans' be taxpayers? Wounded Bear Jun 2013 #49

I just wanted to take this opportunity to say ellie Jun 2013 #50

Not with a stolen dick Nanjing to Seoul Jun 2013 #145

He thinks that without DOMA you'll make it a threesome... JHB Jun 2013 #179

Does this mean we can legally start combining various animal DNA with human DNA, kentauros Jun 2013 #51

He's just checking. Asking for a friend. Orsino Jun 2013 #52

You know what the leading cause of poverty is in this country, elitist selfish bastards like Rand Johonny Jun 2013 #53

Beg your pardon? I have no desire to marry a Republican! KansDem Jun 2013 #54

I guess Aqua Buddha will perform the ceremony, right Rand. Historic NY Jun 2013 #55

Great!,now I just need to find a Vulcan,or an Elf to marry and I'll be happy. athenasatanjesus Jun 2013 #57

Lol, nt Sand Wind Jun 2013 #58

This Paul statement calls out for satire. MineralMan Jun 2013 #59

Rand Paul is a classless, idiotic loser. npk Jun 2013 #60

In his part of the country perhaps... Matariki Jun 2013 #61

Isn't a legal marriage a contract that needs to be signed and witnessed? haele Jun 2013 #66

Kim Jong Paul The Wizard Jun 2013 #67

Well he would know,wouldn't he notadmblnd Jun 2013 #70

Only in a forced choice Spirochete Jun 2013 #71

If this is all that prickwit has as argument against Teh Gay, I ain't worried. Kurovski Jun 2013 #72

I corporations are people, why not marry a turnip??? Sancho Jun 2013 #73

Only if I can marry InBev! Initech Jun 2013 #75

How can anyone hallucinate felix_numinous Jun 2013 #74

but according to you and your dad's ideology, they should be free to do whatever they want SemperEadem Jun 2013 #76

I swear these people all think Americans have IQs of about 15. kestrel91316 Jun 2013 #77

As a Pennsylvanian, I'm proud he's taking up Sen. Man-on-Dog Santorum's cause. Demoiselle Jun 2013 #78

Waiting for Republican to marry a corporation. nt SDjack Jun 2013 #80

This message was self-deleted by its author Javaman Jun 2013 #81

rand paul may call himself a libertarian, but he is not. He is just another repuke bigot still_one Jun 2013 #83

I'm infatuated by my new office chair...... dhill926 Jun 2013 #84

Contracts bl968 Jun 2013 #85

They must also be able to SIGN contracts LiberalEsto Jun 2013 #90

You've yet to see a dog or cat picking up a pen? You have obviously... Moonwalk Jun 2013 #140

Posted on FB today... tridim Jun 2013 #86

Okay, I didn't expect the lower right one. (nt) Posteritatis Jun 2013 #93

Holy crap! Tree-Hugger Jun 2013 #111

Duck goat love!! lunasun Jun 2013 #122

"why a duck?" Spitfire of ATJ Jun 2013 #162

yes a Marxist question + pic = lunasun Jun 2013 #194

It's a slippery slope leading to communication by horn. Spitfire of ATJ Jun 2013 #195

And I thought Rand was already married to a human!?!? grattsl Jun 2013 #87

He must know. Beacool Jun 2013 #89

Oh owch davidpdx Jun 2013 #113

Except, that it is an insult to poodles. Beacool Jun 2013 #120

This message was self-deleted by its author Beacool Jun 2013 #132

Rand is having an affair with whatever it is on top of his head, so Thor_MN Jun 2013 #91

I don't see a problem Theyletmeeatcake2 Jun 2013 #92

Rand Paul needs to read the 14th Amendment. JDPriestly Jun 2013 #95

I actually have to agree. H2O Man Jun 2013 #97

STFU you POS Jag-Off. SoapBox Jun 2013 #98

But it's already been done. Lynn Cheney married Dick. nt valerief Jun 2013 #99

Yeah, because law is the only thing that's been stopping humans from marrying nonhumans. winter is coming Jun 2013 #100

Oh FFS Phlem Jun 2013 #101

Time for Santorum to dig out all his "Man on Dog" nutwaddery again. DirkGently Jun 2013 #102

Don't forget John "Man-On-Box-Turtle" Cornyn. Initech Jun 2013 #129

Well, some space aliens are kinda purty. tclambert Jun 2013 #104

What the hell is he talking about??!! SummerSnow Jun 2013 #105

You know how the worst anti-gay zealots always seem to be truebluegreen Jun 2013 #106

This just goes to show that Rand Paul is a fraud. He claims to be a libertarian. totodeinhere Jun 2013 #107

Embarrassingly stupid. SammyWinstonJack Jun 2013 #108

a few months ago bill maher commented DesertFlower Jun 2013 #109

Wow. I didn't know non-humans HAD their own DOMA. randome Jun 2013 #110

for not kicking the Christ baby angrychair Jun 2013 #112

Inventively phrased! randome Jun 2013 #114

Wasn't "Best Friend's Emu" a song by the Cars in the 80s? Arugula Latte Jun 2013 #136

He should marry a pig davidpdx Jun 2013 #115

Stacy's cochon has got it goin' on... JHB Jun 2013 #175

Is this an Onion article? MNBrewer Jun 2013 #116

Nazis shared this malformed thinking process fascisthunter Jun 2013 #117

What he said v what he wants... displacedtexan Jun 2013 #118

Non-humans don't want to marry. undeterred Jun 2013 #119

Rand Paul is such an ignorant asshole and so's that "dreamy" Cha Jun 2013 #123

They really don't understand terms like legal capacity and Ilsa Jun 2013 #124

They already see half the human race in that group, so I'd say they misunderstood a lot. freshwest Jun 2013 #193

Finally, I can have my pony and marry it too. Marie Marie Jun 2013 #125

Such low standards! eridani Jun 2013 #170

Well, Turbineguy Jun 2013 #126

So the lack of DOMA is why his own wife married a horse's ass? MotherPetrie Jun 2013 #128

I thought he was a leading Libertarian? AgingAmerican Jun 2013 #130

Why are you complaining, Rand? Now you can finally marry Aqua Buddha. SunSeeker Jun 2013 #131

Marriage with a Non-Human has already happened many times in the past. Look at the Romneys. Arugula Latte Jun 2013 #133

Let me guess, the Vulcans? Coyotl Jun 2013 #134

Rand Paul bestiality comment 'sarcasm,' office says. Beacool Jun 2013 #135

He thinks about weird sexual things Lex Jun 2013 #137

if that's his only problem, easy solution samsingh Jun 2013 #139

Paulbots piss me off. Especially DU Paulbots. They support shit like this Nanjing to Seoul Jun 2013 #142

Why don't you name names. backscatter712 Jun 2013 #146

Go to any Paul discussion. I am in no mood to go through DU thread by thread Nanjing to Seoul Jun 2013 #147

No, you threw the accusation. Name names. I'm not doing your work for you. n/t backscatter712 Jun 2013 #148

Again, I have a life and a wife that loves me and wants to spend time with me. Nanjing to Seoul Jun 2013 #149

While it is true that general public perception of Paul support does not differentiate issues, so patrice Jun 2013 #151

It's too late, we're all doooooooomed!!!!!!!!!!!!! Revanchist Jun 2013 #154

That explains my sudden urge to screw small animals. n/t Lil Missy Jun 2013 #157

Playing to the fundies customerserviceguy Jun 2013 #158

He's obviously thinking about something in particular. A lot. n/t Fire Walk With Me Jun 2013 #160

NUTZ blkmusclmachine Jun 2013 #163

So he represents a state full of jackasses who allow animals to sign contracts? eridani Jun 2013 #164

That explains HIS ancestry. hobbit709 Jun 2013 #169

A human has already married an animal lbrtbell Jun 2013 #173

As a "libertarian" Paul should know quaker bill Jun 2013 #176

humans will marry Non Humans without DOMA maxcopper Jun 2013 #177

Gee, Rand, how did we ever get by before DOMA? Enthusiast Jun 2013 #178

Good bye, Paul! You silly, silly man. BenzoDia Jun 2013 #180

Already have get the red out Jun 2013 #181

This is absolutely ridiculous. Grateful for Hope Jun 2013 #183

That's weird...I don't feel the urge to marry my Nintendo DS, though. Jamaal510 Jun 2013 #185

We need to send these guys to the cyber sanitarium for bat shit crazy public figures, Cleita Jun 2013 #197

Too bad Reagan shut down the institutions Rhiannon12866 Jun 2013 #198

Forget Marrying my Cats... AnnieBW Jun 2013 #200

Sounds like Rand is training his pet goat to sign a marriage license Bjorn Against Jun 2013 #201

My Sock Monkey Tim is very happy to learn this! WinkyDink Jun 2013 #202

Just So Long as I Don't Have to Marry Randroid Paul Wolf Frankula Jun 2013 #203