General Discussion

NoOneMan

(4,795 posts)

65. "you men"

Mon Dec 23, 2013, 02:36 PM

Dec 2013

Come on now. We're all on the same team here.

you only want

I am not directly telling any specific woman what she wants. I am talking about human behavior. A human interaction with a more attractive person will be perceived more positively than one with a less attractive person. A positive interaction can be considered a welcomed or permissible interaction. That's just the way it is for men or women.

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This message was self-deleted by its author [View all] grahamhgreen Dec 2013 OP

If starers don't want to be creepy, they should of been born more attractive NoOneMan Dec 2013 #1

Good looking guys are creepy when they do it as well. geek tragedy Dec 2013 #6

Oh those things? I only notice when they are propped up and out in the open NoOneMan Dec 2013 #9

Are you pretending that you can't tell the difference between seeing and staring? geek tragedy Dec 2013 #10

Are you pretending the difference isn't partly perceptual and arbitrary? NoOneMan Dec 2013 #19

5 year olds can figure it out, so grown men should be able to process it. geek tragedy Dec 2013 #21

No they can't NoOneMan Dec 2013 #29

Nice Man-Shaming Diego_Native 2012 Dec 2013 #96

Lol wut? geek tragedy Dec 2013 #98

Well then I am 5 years old then Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #187

Yeah! Those damn women should leave those things at home! Otherwise what choice do you have Squinch Dec 2013 #66

What choice do any of us have? NoOneMan Dec 2013 #77

You have obviously never been on a subway in the summer. Squinch Dec 2013 #93

Is there lots of women on women boob ogling? NoOneMan Dec 2013 #101

and you know what? most of the good looking older (out of teens) men do not do it. you know why? seabeyond Dec 2013 #20

Of course, because their hunky lerring is perceived as dreamy gazing NoOneMan Dec 2013 #25

So? ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #32

"See the universal beauty in every woman" NoOneMan Dec 2013 #36

wrong. it is decades of having the attention directed toward me and seeing the difference in the two seabeyond Dec 2013 #33

Your response is based on an unprovable perception of reality NoOneMan Dec 2013 #49

you men are the ones popping up declaring... you only want the good looking men looking. i am not seabeyond Dec 2013 #54

"you men" NoOneMan Dec 2013 #65

the "you men" out of the handful i am seeing now raising this point. saying "you" men to separate seabeyond Dec 2013 #82

"i get in trouble for saying men.... cause that means all men" NoOneMan Dec 2013 #86

then quit getting all bent out of shape when i say men. it does not mean ALL men. and when i say seabeyond Dec 2013 #103

"when talking about something specific and a handful of posters" NoOneMan Dec 2013 #111

you would be wrong. what i am not gonna do is work on quantifying the number i feel. if it is a lot seabeyond Dec 2013 #121

"what i will not do is be directed by you and others what i am allowed to post" NoOneMan Dec 2013 #128

I think there are situations where the line is fuzzy--and some where it is not. tblue37 Dec 2013 #194

Well said. grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #214

If men didn't want to be creepy, they should have been born women. hughee99 Dec 2013 #225

LOL, NoOneMan. That was funny. roguevalley Dec 2013 #234

. . . . . . WilliamPitt Dec 2013 #2

*drinks* Brickbat Dec 2013 #3

If the shoe fits! Sheldon Cooper Dec 2013 #4

You know what never works when approaching a woman to get her phone geek tragedy Dec 2013 #5

Please do not use the offensive anti-feminist term "douchebags" on DU NoOneMan Dec 2013 #11

lmao. This subject is like MRA bingo nt geek tragedy Dec 2013 #13

Have you ever dressed up to make yourself more attractive? Please be honest. I have, grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #24

Oy. If someone is actually dressing up to make themselves more attractive, i.e. seeking sexual geek tragedy Dec 2013 #30

Not just for sex. But to attract a mate as well. Now, just say you see a prospective partner, grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #42

Do you really not understand what ogling is? geek tragedy Dec 2013 #50

Pray tell... Diego_Native 2012 Dec 2013 #118

Feminists LOVE burkas!!1! It's a FACT!1! xulamaude Dec 2013 #124

Most educated people know the difference between "seeing" and "noticing" and "appreciating" geek tragedy Dec 2013 #125

And if they don't, you're here to set 'em straight. Comrade Grumpy Dec 2013 #148

Just like you're here to enable their behavior, I guess nt geek tragedy Dec 2013 #150

Well, if they don't, someone ought to! Squinch Dec 2013 #168

I agree. And women need to stop modeling this behavior to men NoOneMan Dec 2013 #126

It's like she dressed up just for him, doncha know... boston bean Dec 2013 #45

of course she wanted to be ogled and leered at, why else would she leave the burka at home? geek tragedy Dec 2013 #52

yeah, i saw that. that was pretty sick... boston bean Dec 2013 #55

from someone who's obsession here is prominent athletes geek tragedy Dec 2013 #67

So all the attractively dressed women I see downtown AgingAmerican Dec 2013 #158

It is no longer taboo to say Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #238

I work with many attractively dressed, married women AgingAmerican Dec 2013 #241

Well both men and women want to feel Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #242

yet you stated dressing up to look attractive is the woman's job LanternWaste Dec 2013 #53

Quit dressing up to look attractive as that is women's JOB. I mean, REALLY!!!!11111 uppityperson Dec 2013 #61

If these danged women would just stop it with all this dressing up boston bean Dec 2013 #72

what happens mercuryblues Dec 2013 #196

Yes Boudica the Lyoness Dec 2013 #62

And there is a difference between a woman who is actively seeking dates, Sheldon Cooper Dec 2013 #163

+1000 Bobbie Jo Dec 2013 #159

Tell it to the women: grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #169

Yahoo! answers? geek tragedy Dec 2013 #182

it is just before grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #217

Well, no. Squinch Dec 2013 #228

Yah. Everyone wants to date these guys, for sure: MineralMan Dec 2013 #7

If it was me and my friend Joyce HappyMe Dec 2013 #60

Yep. nt xulamaude Dec 2013 #99

I guess I will try to not look at HappyMe Dec 2013 #108

Darn it! I enjoy looking. In_The_Wind Dec 2013 #226

Yah, pretty much. MineralMan Dec 2013 #105

Women don't get caught? HappyMe Dec 2013 #112

I'm not sure. Maybe a photo of you and Joyce MineralMan Dec 2013 #119

Never happen. HappyMe Dec 2013 #129

See how you are? Now we'll never know if you're really leering and ogling MineralMan Dec 2013 #145

Now, now. HappyMe Dec 2013 #156

We like you too:) grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #164

Or when I caught a woman at work staring at my butt... tridim Dec 2013 #231

They're doing men a favor... HereSince1628 Dec 2013 #8

... The Velveteen Ocelot Dec 2013 #12

I beg to differ. Ending would be a good thing, however it happens. yellowcanine Dec 2013 #31

Looks like they're flying a Leer Jet. (n/t) klook Dec 2013 #154

ROFL grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #186

oh noes... The poor oppressed men... Ohio Joe Dec 2013 #14

irrationally pretend to know what "our job" is. LanternWaste Dec 2013 #15

is this for real? i am thinking it is a joke. not? nt seabeyond Dec 2013 #18

It's far too sub-literate to be a joke. LanternWaste Dec 2013 #51

i really was confused. reading up the thread. realizing, no, not a joke. nt seabeyond Dec 2013 #63

And stop asking what's under my kilt! n/t hootinholler Dec 2013 #16

Sorry. It's one of life's great mysteries. HappyMe Dec 2013 #22

Happens every time, lol hootinholler Dec 2013 #41

Do you play bagpipes? ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #44

Sadly no. hootinholler Dec 2013 #80

Too many funerals for that one ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #91

For me, it's more that it wasn't written for the pipes hootinholler Dec 2013 #104

Another mystery - HappyMe Dec 2013 #46

It's the physics hootinholler Dec 2013 #95

Thanks. HappyMe Dec 2013 #100

really? seabeyond Dec 2013 #17

"Women dress up to make themselves attractive, duh." Not the same as wanting a date. duh. yellowcanine Dec 2013 #23

Well, they don't "Dress to Kill" in order to kill somebody, now, do they? grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #170

I submit that as society defines what 'looking nice' is CFLDem Dec 2013 #201

Well that's the assumption, isn't it? And like many assumptions, wrong. yellowcanine Dec 2013 #211

Is the opposite true then? women who do not "dress up" are lacking self respect? uppityperson Dec 2013 #215

Oh I don't know - can't afford nice clothing - or they have a different notion of what they need yellowcanine Dec 2013 #220

I am one who feels no need to wear makeup, don't give a shit if you consider me "dumpy" because of t uppityperson Dec 2013 #221

Not creep shaming of men ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #26

The problem is pintobean Dec 2013 #43

DU is fluid in its topics ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #71

What I do not understand is ... 1StrongBlackMan Dec 2013 #160

Because they're blanket statements pintobean Dec 2013 #183

I think ... 1StrongBlackMan Dec 2013 #199

So is slut shaming ok if the woman in question actually is promiscuous? JVS Dec 2013 #240

Wow. So you think women can be 'sluts'? redqueen Dec 2013 #245

"Our job to approach...etc etc" Spider Jerusalem Dec 2013 #27

Is this a parody? liberalmuse Dec 2013 #28

It would be a total waste if it's not actually a parody! LOL boston bean Dec 2013 #34

I think so ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #35

i thought it was also. i really did. then perused the thread and see it is serious. nt seabeyond Dec 2013 #40

Nope! It's GREAT, isn't it? Squinch Dec 2013 #113

As a man, I can understand how staring can be creepy. Vashta Nerada Dec 2013 #37

Every woman I've ever been with stared at me. Longingly, I grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #180

Yeah, but they weren't creepy people you didn't know in public. Vashta Nerada Dec 2013 #202

Of course. This is just a post to push back on the generalization of men as creeps. Attraction is grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #205

It's my job? Iggo Dec 2013 #38

"It is our job"? W.T.F? Having a penis means you have a "job" of asking for dates and numbers? uppityperson Dec 2013 #39

Correct. Welcome to our societies norms. If a man never approaches, or asks for dates or numbers, grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #47

Words fail me. At least ones that won't get hidden. Suffice it to say..... uppityperson Dec 2013 #56

It's a miracle any lesbians find each other and become couples KitSileya Dec 2013 #109

How DO they do it?! LOL! xulamaude Dec 2013 #117

Come on, this is in a hetero context.... grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #190

Nope. I've never once feared that a xulamaude Dec 2013 #193

Yeah, it's our job, and sometimes.... grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #184

And is it also a Man's Job to work and support the woman? What is the woman's Job? uppityperson Dec 2013 #189

OK, so you concede the point that in our society, the man is expected to approach? grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #191

No, I do not conced that at all but am asking if supporting women is also men's job and uppityperson Dec 2013 #192

I support my women 100%. Is all I can say. grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #212

Is financially supporting women also mens Job? What are womens Job/Jobs? uppityperson Dec 2013 #213

YOUR women?! xulamaude Dec 2013 #216

I simply love them :) grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #219

Don't you have any sources that are geared older then middle school? First Yahoo answers, then this? Squinch Dec 2013 #230

You know, that's not so. Not at all. MineralMan Dec 2013 #142

I don't know about you, but when I was single Boudica the Lyoness Dec 2013 #73

I have had no problem doing so. It gives the impressiomn you are interested and this is what? Bad? uppityperson Dec 2013 #90

Is there still a fair amount of women who have an expectation that the man make the first move penultimate Dec 2013 #172

Good Job! mockmonkey Dec 2013 #48

I shame no Man. Tuesday Afternoon Dec 2013 #57

It's not MY job. arcane1 Dec 2013 #58

Everybody do The Creep! zappaman Dec 2013 #59

LOL ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #78

LMAO!!! darkangel218 Dec 2013 #81

Lonely Island FTW! Initech Dec 2013 #85

Perfect! Squinch Dec 2013 #97

Aproaching is fine. darkangel218 Dec 2013 #64

Not shaming me. GeorgeGist Dec 2013 #68

Ad hominem...you lose. Diego_Native 2012 Dec 2013 #127

Seriously? You just said that? Does your mother know you're posting? Squinch Dec 2013 #132

I was just going to say: xulamaude Dec 2013 #161

I reced to put on Greatest page for wimmin and mens would learn about their JOBs. uppityperson Dec 2013 #69

Who needs butter? I've got plenty! Initech Dec 2013 #70

Yes, please pass some over. The corn is easy to pop on this flame bait stevenleser Dec 2013 #75

I need some. darkangel218 Dec 2013 #76

Over here, man LittleBlue Dec 2013 #94

I should go buy some stock in Orville Redenbacher and Land O'Lakes! Initech Dec 2013 #130

I'm a creep, what the hell am I doin here BootinUp Dec 2013 #74

Buy us more drinks, dammit!! darkangel218 Dec 2013 #79

Yeah I'm getting low on beer here! Initech Dec 2013 #133

anything you say, lol BootinUp Dec 2013 #162

Ha, I was about to post the same thing. WorseBeforeBetter Dec 2013 #110

Message auto-removed Name removed Dec 2013 #83

If that's what you took away from this, then that's just sad. NuclearDem Dec 2013 #89

You created an account just to jump into this? arcane1 Dec 2013 #134

Just can't stay away, can you? PeaceNikki Dec 2013 #137

sorry dude DonCoquixote Dec 2013 #84

As I said in the OP:) BUT, socially awkward men are creep shamed, quite often, when grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #198

I am an Asberger's sufferer DonCoquixote Dec 2013 #247

This message was self-deleted by its author politichew Dec 2013 #87

What year is this? YoungDemCA Dec 2013 #88

This message was self-deleted by its author politichew Dec 2013 #92

Bullshit ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #106

Message auto-removed Name removed Dec 2013 #116

When the guy is eyeballing you up and down, can't keep his eyes to himself boston bean Dec 2013 #120

How does a jury let the observation that a woman can have "slut all over her" go? geek tragedy Dec 2013 #136

Duh! I think that was his point ...... oldhippie Dec 2013 #146

No, that was just a garden variety misogynist troll who has been MIRTed. nt geek tragedy Dec 2013 #147

No kidding. laundry_queen Dec 2013 #149

He's gone now. PeaceNikki Dec 2013 #151

Yeah, jury let that post stand though. MIRT has to clean up after a lot of messes geek tragedy Dec 2013 #153

Indeed. If that is/wasn't a zombie, I will eat my hat. PeaceNikki Dec 2013 #155

yeah, probably nt geek tragedy Dec 2013 #157

Creepy eyes. WorseBeforeBetter Dec 2013 #138

Perhaps I should have clarified ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #140

I understood you the first time. (n/t) WorseBeforeBetter Dec 2013 #175

Hey you think she wants you? ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #143

The now-banned poster didn't seem to *get* creepy eyes. WorseBeforeBetter Dec 2013 #177

Perhaps I should have clarified ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #139

You even see it on the internets. A-Schwarzenegger Dec 2013 #141

Someone posting in this thread has suggested (in at least one other thread)... WorseBeforeBetter Dec 2013 #131

One womans ogle is another's loving stare... it's very subjective. grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #210

I ogled a beautiful 21-year-old the other day. WorseBeforeBetter Dec 2013 #233

Instant Classic. A-Schwarzenegger Dec 2013 #102

And I think completely unintentional. Squinch Dec 2013 #107

That makes it so much more delicious! boston bean Dec 2013 #115

I assure you, I'm enjoying this as much as you are. Now, if I could grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #208

not likely. boston bean Dec 2013 #209

Haha! grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #223

Like the kind some men make in the same situation? Squinch Dec 2013 #232

Cross posted because I hadn't seen this little gem of idiocy intaglio Dec 2013 #114

Stop with the prannock shaming. A-Schwarzenegger Dec 2013 #122

LOL! boston bean Dec 2013 #123

I'm not sure I follow this analogy. Laelth Dec 2013 #222

Perhaps it applies to any person who looks exceptional intaglio Dec 2013 #237

I hope you forgot to tag the sarcasm thingy ... 1StrongBlackMan Dec 2013 #135

People take the word job seriously The2ndWheel Dec 2013 #144

I hope you are young Cal Carpenter Dec 2013 #152

. Dash87 Dec 2013 #165

I agree 100% with you grahamgreen Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #166

Have you looked at a calendar lately? Do you know what year it is? n/t kcr Dec 2013 #200

Is someone saying guys are not supposed to ever approach women to ask them out? penultimate Dec 2013 #167

I don't think you will find any posts that meet the criteria of your last sentence. nt boston bean Dec 2013 #206

Someone sesiously alerted this. And lost 6-0. Unbelievable. Talkin gabout trying to... Logical Dec 2013 #171

Men aren't the cause of creep-shaming. rocktivity Dec 2013 #173

Wait, is this Tumblr? Jester Messiah Dec 2013 #174

You do have a point. I could never approach ecstatic Dec 2013 #176

That is exactly the problem. KitSileya Dec 2013 #227

I didn't connect the dots at first, because I don't think ecstatic Dec 2013 #236

Some people do not like to be starred at or checked out. hrmjustin Dec 2013 #178

I agree. Most men are not that obvious. And should not be. n-t Logical Dec 2013 #181

Some people like to look at whatever they see in public. JVS Dec 2013 #239

Do you think it is rude to stare at someone when and make them uncomfortable? hrmjustin Dec 2013 #244

Are you referring to the Indian film? BainsBane Dec 2013 #179

This message was self-deleted by its author go west young man Dec 2013 #185

Hoo, boy. sibelian Dec 2013 #188

Attraction is a big part if a person Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #197

Yes, but if one is unable to distinguish showing respectful attraction BainsBane Dec 2013 #224

submitted without comment, the rational wiki entry for 'creep shaming' geek tragedy Dec 2013 #195

LOL. Yes, there are creeps. Labeling a male creepy for looking at a girl who has grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #204

no one is doing any of the things about which you're complaining. geek tragedy Dec 2013 #207

Intentionally dressed to attract men treestar Dec 2013 #246

This is epic Bok_Tukalo Dec 2013 #203

. Shankapotomus Dec 2013 #218

But the media has indoctrinated people into believing that socially awkward/introverted is.... Taitertots Dec 2013 #229

I do think the men shaming goes too far sometimes, but times have changed. It is not a man's job liberal_at_heart Dec 2013 #235

lol is it 1950? treestar Dec 2013 #243

... derby378 Dec 2013 #248

I never asked girls for their phone number AgingAmerican Dec 2013 #249

Stop with the creeping and I will quit with the shaming. we can do it Dec 2013 #250

Well, that was fun! Locking... just remember.... grahamhgreen Dec 2013 #251