please get documentation in order. You can direct your doctors, hospitals, etc. with whom to share and not share your medical info, get wills, etc.
The bit about your medical records should not require more than a letter. Unless you have a huge complicated estate, a standard will should not cost much. If you can't afford even a little, a form that you find online for your state might do it.
And I hope with all my heart that someday soon, your state will also recognize your marriage. If not, I urge you to consider living in Massachusetts, the first state to recognize fully equal rights to marriage (IIRC, while Romney was Governor, too, though he tried to use an old statute against it).
And, since equal marriage has been law in Massachusetts for so long, you don't have to worry about traditional marriages because, of course, equal marriage ended them all within a year.
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