General Discussion
In reply to the discussion: Do fathers still expect to be asked permission to marry their daughter? Is this a sexist tradition? [View all]KentuckyWoman
(6,666 posts)When my husband and I decided to get married we went by ourselves and talked to each other's parents. Not to ask for permission but to make nice, get advice yada yada. My mother in law and I never got along. In fact she hated my guts.
BUT
Since I "showed respect" to the parents who raised my husband by seeking advice before we announced to the world our engagement I had my father in law in my corner. He always gave me the benefit of the doubt when my way and there way was different. He'd step in on occasion and tell Mom in law to mind her beeswax. Also made for an easier time with our respective parents working with each other on holidays etc.
My parents liked my husband but weren't real crazy about me getting married at that point in life. Him going over there to have a chat won them over. It was not about permission but simple communication and clearing the air.
We'll be 45 years married soon. And though we've had our moments we still hold hands and smooch in public.
So something to be said for what we chose to do.