I am interested in reading experiences of primary caregivers of a dying parent.

[LeftyMom]

22. My sister accused my mother of malingering while she was on a ventilator.

Once we got it through her head that they don't put you on a ventilator for being a whiner they put you on one because you'll die without she decided it was my mother's fault.

Not long after when it looked like our father was going to die (he pulled through, got stronger and got a transplant) she really wasn't much more helpful, even though they have a much better relationship. She left the hospital while we were waiting for him to be taken up to surgery for his transplant because she had to teach an exercise class.

I guess the only thing I can say is that shitty, self-centered people don't magically become selfless and giving of their time when their parents get sick, and that mortality only draws families together in made-for-cable movies.