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Wed Jul 11, 2012, 03:18 AM

Advice for dealing with an abrasive/combative new co-worker? [View all]

Recently I started working at an additional location, after working pretty much alone for over a year, and am starting to remember why I really love being self employed.

Everyone else in my new co-op type situation is ultra easygoing and friendly, but of course there is that one person who is a malcontent. This person seems to have taken an instant dislike to me, and is hypercritical, (and I've noticed often hypocritical) maybe because everyone else, including the "boss", seems to appreciate and notice I am trying hard to please and do everything right.

For whatever the reason she has targeted me, it doesn't really matter, I'm just not wanting to feed into her game, and I have a feeling that no matter what she is determined to try to undermine me and bring down my mood to her level.

I know intellectually it's not really about me, and my initial emotional response isn't really about her, and for now I've been able to just let it roll and remain extra sweet and smiley when dealing with her, "kill them with kindness", right?

I'm afraid that one day I'll be tired, or stressed, or hot, or hungry, or fed up, and snap back at her. Serving no purpose but making myself look less cool and collected, and adult, as I'd like.

Plus I really don't want to start dreading work every day and want to be able to let the negativity roll off me better.

So long story short, I'm wondering if anyone else has successfully dealt with this type of person before, maybe with some humor, snappy comebacks, compassionate questioning. Or simply with time do some people get better, after they see you are an ok person, and I've just got the "new girl" syndrome going on?



(I'm usually easy to get along with, and even when someone started spouting Ron Paul drivel

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Reply Advice for dealing with an abrasive/combative new co-worker? [View all]
freeplessinseattle Jul 2012 OP
Major Nikon Jul 2012 #1
ellisonz Jul 2012 #2
lovemydog Jul 2012 #3
lunatica Jul 2012 #4
Ineeda Jul 2012 #5
Scuba Jul 2012 #7
TuxedoKat Jul 2012 #15
raccoon Jul 2012 #22
TuxedoKat Jul 2012 #26
HopeHoops Jul 2012 #6
pipi_k Jul 2012 #8
HopeHoops Jul 2012 #10
TuxedoKat Jul 2012 #27
turtlerescue1 Jul 2012 #9
raccoon Jul 2012 #11
turtlerescue1 Jul 2012 #16
raccoon Jul 2012 #12
lastlib Jul 2012 #13
libodem Jul 2012 #14
NV Whino Jul 2012 #17
AmyDeLune Jul 2012 #18
raccoon Jul 2012 #23
mrmpa Jul 2012 #19
Ikonoklast Jul 2012 #20
Fridays Child Jul 2012 #21
raccoon Jul 2012 #24
BlueCollar Jul 2012 #25