The DU Lounge
In reply to the discussion: Wedding etiquette poll [View all]Lisa D
(1,532 posts)about the baby being uncomfortable around all the people/noise, I think the FB message might be okay. But I think it crossed the line when you expressed your reaction of not being thrilled to find yourself seated next to a 3 week old infant. This infant is part of the family, right? And is probably loved and adored by said family. Also, many new parents are hesitant to leave such a young baby with a babysitter.
I guess I'm looking at how I would react. If my aunt had sent a FB message stating that she would not be thrilled to find herself seated near my new baby at dinner, I would be very hurt. Part of that hurt would derive from the feeling that she didn't respect me enough to know I would take the baby outside if it started to fuss--and your niece *may* feel that same way.
I could be completely off base here, but I'm wondering if posting that FB message was a way to get yourself disinvited from a wedding you don't want to attend or subconsciously hoping the message causes enough of a kerfuffle that it would cause you not to attend.
Best of luck to you! I hope the FB message is received in the way you intended.