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In reply to the discussion: What's Your Preferred Cure when you are in one of those "moods" [View all]Raine1967
(11,589 posts)(and it's not easy getting to this place, not from my experience: I am a person who likes to be there for people I care about and for things I car about. -- but I got here, and it is amazing-- I'm not the selfish person I was afraid I would become.)
One word, two letters:
No.
It does't have to be said with defense... apologetic might make you feel more comfortable.
But No is way to tell people you do not want to deal with chaos.
I've had in recent months a serious panic attack that I realized was a result of me not being able to say 'no' -- it lead me to break away from a person in my life that was taking more from our friendship than be a part of it. I walked away. It was hard, and still is.
I said 'No' because I didn't want to keep having chaos in my life.