Last edited Thu Mar 21, 2013, 05:59 AM - Edit history (3)
And all of the alternative concepts of higher power, when plugged into some of the steps, particularly step 3 or 7 or 11, don't make any sense to me. Or, for me, they just seem to lack the power I need when dealing with a hard situation, like alcoholism.
(On edit, I got rid of the original first paragraph about using one's thinking as one's higher power as being dangerous. On reflection, when one hears good advice it only makes sense to at least think about it and consider it).
It seems there are regional differences in A.A. and Al-Anon. Just like the "no higher power police" thing, but we've discussed that one before. http://www.democraticunderground.com/1144174#post4
Some atheists I know, myself included, have been advised to "lie" and "fake it until you make it" -- very strange advice in a program based on rigorous honesty. I've certainly been told, and I know other atheists have, that having the group as a higher power was a good start, but only a start, and not enough to stay sober long-term.
I haven't been to a meeting in a long long time (although I keep putting the darn things on my calendar) because, well, about 80% of what I hear is stuff about a deity helping alcoholics and family members of alcoholics find a parking spot or getting into the left turn lane in time, or giving oomph to their car batteries, and I just think of people starving to death in the third world, or dying of a malnutrition-related disease, once every 3 seconds on average. I wonder why God is letting people starve and die from agonizing diseases (no morphine drips in a lot of places), while taking care of the cars of wealthy Americans and helping them drive (most of us are wealthy by the standards of about 80% of the world). Just not my idea of spirituality.
And all I hear is God this and God that and God God God, and from what they say, the vast majority are using that word in the context of a deity, and not some alternative concept like Group Of Drunks, Good Orderly Direction, or Gift Of Desperation. I'm sorry, but I just can't relate to it. I try hard to focus on the other 20%, but, well, I haven't been able to get enough out of the 20% to make up for the 80%.
If it was just a matter of adopting the concept of a higher power, it would be easy, I already have -- the help and wisdom of others. But when its little different than a church service for some generic non-denominational God, but a deity God nevertheless, then I feel more and more that I'm in the wrong place.
I guess why I write this is that you make it sound like all one has to do is get the higher power thing, and once one picks some higher power concept, there is no other reason to be hung up about the program / meetings. Well, I've got higher powers, but I'm still hung up and wish I wasn't, but I am.
Anyway, I hope all is well with you 
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