Got a call yesterday evening, that a brother had killed himself and I don't care

[fizzgig]

13. i don't quite know that i can completely relate

but i see where you are coming from.

my dad has two daughters from a previous relationship. his family has a relationship with them, but my dad, sister and i have absolutely no communication with them. the last time we saw them was at my grandmother's funeral five years ago, prior to which the youngest called my dad and told him that he was in no way to use the occasion as means to initiate contact with her.

i might be saddened by the fact they were in such darkness that they felt it was the only action to take, but their death in and of itself would bring me no sadness.

edit: my heart will always break for my father that he is estranged from his daughters because of toxic circumstances. i love him fiercely and can't imagine the pain this has caused him and i know my disdain for and indifference to them is caused by that pain. maybe some day i can let that particular pain go.

sorry if this is an inappropriate place for an over share, but it hit on a hurt part of me that usually stays hidden away.