My first Fathers Day without my Dad.

[orleans]

5. i'm very sorry for your loss

the first father's day without dad is hard as the next one may be and the one after that.
seeing the card displays in the stores were really difficult for me--i'd start crying as i walked past them--took a couple years before i could slow down, look, and still i'd tear up.

it's a big adjustment. it's devastating.
i'm sorry you're going through this period in your life.

i lost my dad 24 years ago--can't recall how long it took before i felt like i had accepted his absence or adjusted to him not being around.

i lost my mom over 2 and a half years ago and i'm still not together about it. sometimes when i talk about her, unemotionally, it's as if i'm speaking of someone else--i can put up this feigned detachment for people. but at home? or when i'm alone? omg. i am so not detached--still so emotionally invested in her, and i still talk to her a lot, and cry a lot. i'll hear her voice in my mind. i tell her to give me "signs" and she does. i don't think she's that far away, but i can't see her or hug her and i hate it.

it's a big adjustment. and again, i'm very sorry. take care.