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Bereavement

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kairos12

(13,062 posts)
Sat Jun 1, 2024, 01:43 PM Jun 1

My wife's death. First time I'm posting. [View all]

Last edited Sat Jun 1, 2024, 08:38 PM - Edit history (1)

My wife died on 10 June last year. I haven't posted about it till now. I guess because it's the anniversary month. A horrible 31 month battle with gastric cancer. I lay beside her for 10 days in Hospice Care. We were married 40 years.

The only thing I've learned is that I used to say I wish I would have gone first. Don't be the one left.

Now, I say I'm glad I didn’t go 1st. There is no chance in hell I would have wanted her to experience the last 12 months.

I want to thank the DU community because it has been the primary source of connection for me during this year. And remains so today.

Peace and strength to all those who are grieving.

181 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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Many very heartfelt condolences... MiHale Jun 1 #1
Thank you MiHale kairos12 Jun 1 #69
My condolences. sinkingfeeling Jun 1 #2
Hello sinkingfeeling kairos12 Jun 1 #70
I learned an interesting word relatively recently, very likely here... 3catwoman3 Jun 1 #3
Is that Yiddish? DFW Jun 1 #8
According to Dictionary.com, it is Yiddish. 3catwoman3 Jun 1 #38
Spanish enid602 Jun 2 #127
The languages are a combination of circumstance and necessity DFW Jun 2 #147
Your suspicion of veil being a typo is right on the money. 3catwoman3 Jun 2 #167
Not to mention.... DFW Jun 2 #169
yes, yahrzeit is the anniversary of a passing The Blue Flower Jun 1 #55
Dear 3catwoman3 kairos12 Jun 1 #71
We light YAHRZEIT candles to mark the anniversary of a passing. elleng Jun 2 #176
My condolences. But for a stroke of luck, I would have been posting something similar DFW Jun 1 #4
So if my math is correct soldierant Jun 1 #42
We met 50 years ago, this July DFW Jun 2 #150
Hello DFW kairos12 Jun 1 #72
She went through a LOT DFW Jun 2 #148
❤️ underpants Jun 1 #5
Dear underpants kairos12 Jun 1 #73
Holding you in my heart. May you find consolation in 40 years of memories. n/t TygrBright Jun 1 #6
Dear TygrBright kairos12 Jun 1 #74
Caring comes in many forms. Yours means a great deal. n/t TygrBright Jun 2 #95
Peace to You IA8IT Jun 1 #7
Dear IA8IT kairos12 Jun 1 #75
I will be thinking of you all day and throughout these days. I can understand and I grieve for you too. hlthe2b Jun 1 #9
Dear hithe2b kairos12 Jun 1 #76
Very sorry for your loss. I hope you'll be kind to yourself. Nt spooky3 Jun 1 #10
Dear spooky3 kairos12 Jun 1 #77
Thank you. ++++++++++++++ spooky3 Jun 1 #84
Sending hugs kairos12 and holding you in my livetohike Jun 1 #11
Dear livetohike kairos12 Jun 1 #78
I am so sorry. badhair77 Jun 1 #12
Dear badhair77 kairos12 Jun 1 #79
All my blessings and sympathies to you. I can't even imagine, but aware that either my wife or I will have to face it. Doodley Jun 1 #13
Dear Doodley kairos12 Jun 1 #80
My heart goes out to you kairos12. Peace and strength to you. LoisB Jun 1 #14
Dear LoisB kairos12 Jun 1 #82
My sincere condolences (((💐))) Deuxcents Jun 1 #15
Dear Deuxcents kairos12 Jun 1 #83
I'm so sorry. barbtries Jun 1 #16
Dear barbtries kairos12 Jun 1 #85
I am so very sorry for your loss Kairos.💔 lucca18 Jun 1 #17
Dear lucca18 kairos12 Jun 1 #86
Seven years since my hubby passed. tavernier Jun 1 #18
Dear tavenier kairos12 Jun 1 #87
My condolences central scrutinizer Jun 1 #19
Dear central scrutinizer kairos12 Jun 2 #89
Thanks. Seven years have passed central scrutinizer Jun 2 #166
I'm so sorry. live love laugh Jun 1 #20
Dear live love laugh kairos12 Jun 2 #90
Peace and grace be with you kairos12 Peacetrain Jun 1 #21
Dear Peacetrain kairos12 Jun 2 #91
We're at Year 48 this year, and not a day goes by when I don't wonder which of us is gonna leave first. calimary Jun 1 #22
Dear calimary kairos12 Jun 2 #92
(((hugs))) samnsara Jun 1 #23
Dear samnsara kairos12 Jun 2 #93
I am so sorry for your unimaginable loss. I am also sorry you've been bearing it for this last year. marble falls Jun 1 #24
Dear marble falls kairos12 Jun 2 #94
One foot in front of the other. I know you will pull through. It is so wise you see his time with you as a blessing ... marble falls Jun 2 #104
I hope you are taking care of yourself lillypaddle Jun 1 #25
Dear lillypaddle kairos12 Jun 2 #96
Heartbreaking wryter2000 Jun 1 #26
Dear wryter2000 kairos12 Jun 2 #97
Hold on to the memories. LiberalFighter Jun 1 #27
Dear LiberalFighter kairos12 Jun 2 #98
Peace and good health to you and yours. Magoo48 Jun 1 #28
Dear Magoo48 kairos12 Jun 2 #99
Please accept my sympathy. It has been 16 years since my husband died. Paper Roses Jun 1 #29
Dear Paper Roses kairos12 Jun 2 #100
Sending love and more love to you! Hope22 Jun 1 #30
Dear Hope22 kairos12 Jun 2 #101
You are welcome. Hope22 Jun 2 #113
Blessings on her memory Wicked Blue Jun 1 #31
Dear Wicked Blue kairos12 Jun 2 #102
I'm so sorry Kairos for the loss of your wife and best friend FakeNoose Jun 1 #32
Dear FakeNoose kairos12 Jun 2 #103
I'm so sorry for your loss. louslobbs Jun 1 #33
Dear louslobbs kairos12 Jun 2 #105
💕 louslobbs Jun 4 #181
Peace to you, kairos12. ancianita Jun 1 #34
Than you for that. Elessar Zappa Jun 1 #40
Dear ancianita kairos12 Jun 2 #106
I'm so very sorry for your loss. yardwork Jun 1 #35
Dear yardwork kairos12 Jun 2 #107
Thank you. How kind of you! yardwork Jun 3 #179
I'm very sorry for your loss. Lost my sister before Trump. 58Sunliner Jun 1 #36
Dear 58Sunliner kairos12 Jun 2 #108
Thank you. 58Sunliner Jun 2 #177
Of an age to think about this rockbluff botanist Jun 1 #37
Dear rockbluff botanist kairos12 Jun 2 #109
Deepest sympathy to you and yours my friend malaise Jun 1 #39
Dear malaise kairos12 Jun 2 #110
Take care of you... Dan Jun 1 #41
Dear Dan kairos12 Jun 2 #111
Heart hugs to you 4TheArts Jun 1 #43
Dear 4TheArts kairos12 Jun 2 #112
So sorry for your loss. It gets better, the grief is rough. Been there myself. brush Jun 1 #44
Dear brush kairos12 Jun 2 #114
I am so very sorry for your loss. Dem2theMax Jun 1 #45
Dear Dem2theMax kairos12 Jun 2 #115
Condolences. AltairIV Jun 1 #46
Dear AltairIV kairos12 Jun 2 #116
So very sorry for your loss! PortTack Jun 1 #47
Dear PortTack kairos12 Jun 2 #118
I lost my first wife at age 39, returnee Jun 1 #48
Dear returnee kairos12 Jun 2 #119
My Condolences and sympathy to you Kairos12, such a long marriage must contain many wonderful ShazamIam Jun 1 #49
Dear Shazamlam kairos12 Jun 2 #120
My sweetheart and I made it to 40 years. Mme. Defarge Jun 1 #50
Dear Mme. Defarge kairos12 Jun 2 #121
Dear kairos12 MLAA Jun 1 #51
Dear MLAA kairos12 Jun 2 #122
Peace and strength to you, kairos12 MerrilyMerrily Jun 1 #52
Dear MerrilyMerrily kairos12 Jun 2 #123
I am sorry for your loss. pandr32 Jun 1 #53
Dear pandr32 kairos12 Jun 2 #124
I am so sorry for your loss. I hope you can find a sense of peace during this time Maraya1969 Jun 1 #54
Dear Maraya1969 kairos12 Jun 2 #125
Oh my, that's sad wendyb-NC Jun 1 #56
Dear wendyb-NC kairos12 Jun 2 #126
My condolences. I lost my wife to cancer seven weeks ago. maveric Jun 1 #57
Dear maveric kairos12 Jun 2 #128
Thank you so much. maveric Jun 2 #132
I hope you're OK. SarahD Jun 1 #58
Dear SarahD kairos12 Jun 2 #129
Hugs DU friend. nt AKwannabe Jun 1 #59
Dear AKwannable kairos12 Jun 2 #130
The first year is often the hardest. Irish_Dem Jun 1 #60
Dear Irish Dem kairos12 Jun 2 #131
So sorry you lost your spouse of a lifetime Farmer-Rick Jun 1 #61
Dear Farmer-Rick kairos12 Jun 2 #133
I'm sorry for your loss. area51 Jun 1 #62
Dear area51 kairos12 Jun 2 #134
Thanks for letting us know. That must have been an awful three years for her. Hope you will be OK. ED Evolve Dammit Jun 1 #63
Dear Evolve Dammit kairos12 Jun 2 #135
Bless you. I lost my husband 17 months ago Richluu Jun 1 #64
Dear Richluu kairos12 Jun 2 #136
Psalms 30:5 Richluu Jun 3 #180
Iknow how hard it. It True Blue American Jun 1 #65
Dear True Blue American kairos12 Jun 2 #137
What a painful thing to go through. I'm sure she was glad you were there with her. flying_wahini Jun 1 #66
Dear flying_wahini kairos12 Jun 2 #138
Peace elleng Jun 1 #67
Dear elleng kairos12 Jun 2 #139
You are most welcome, kairos12. elleng Jun 2 #175
Dear elleng kairos12 Jun 2 #178
Our thoughts... kentuck Jun 1 #68
Dear kentuck kairos12 Jun 2 #140
I'm so sorry for your loss. Ocelot II Jun 1 #81
Dear Ocelot II kairos12 Jun 2 #141
Peace and condolences for your loss. Dulcinea Jun 1 #88
Dear Dulcinea kairos12 Jun 2 #142
So many complex facets to the grief of losing one's life partner. Sending strength to you Attilatheblond Jun 2 #117
Dear Attilatheblond kairos12 Jun 2 #143
I'm so sorry for the loss of your wife of 40 years sdfernando Jun 2 #144
Dear sdfemando kairos12 Jun 2 #156
Sending peace and strength to you... virgdem Jun 2 #145
Dear virgdem kairos12 Jun 2 #157
Thank you for your kind words. virgdem Jun 2 #173
So sorry for your loss nt Nululu Jun 2 #146
Dear Nululu kairos12 Jun 2 #158
Here's hoping you do well in the future Nululu Jun 2 #161
I am so sorry. murielm99 Jun 2 #149
Dear muirelm99 kairos12 Jun 2 #159
Peace BoRaGard Jun 2 #151
Dear BoRaGard kairos12 Jun 2 #160
Sincere condolences , kairos gademocrat7 Jun 2 #152
Dear gademocrat7 kairos12 Jun 2 #162
I'm so sorry. Scrivener7 Jun 2 #153
Dear Scrivener7 kairos12 Jun 2 #163
I know it's tough... and I'm sorry that you're going through this. Oopsie Daisy Jun 2 #154
Dear Oopsie Daisy kairos12 Jun 2 #164
I'm so sorry for your loss cate94 Jun 2 #155
Dear cate94 kairos12 Jun 2 #165
Condolences .... jdadd Jun 2 #168
Dear jaded kairos12 Jun 2 #171
Rest in Paradise, kairos12's beloved wife Niagara Jun 2 #170
Dear Niagara kairos12 Jun 2 #172
This message was self-deleted by its author TBF Jun 2 #174
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