Reply #13: Kinky Friedman in his own words (with links) for all "liberal" Kinky fans

[Czolgosz]

To punish criminals we should "throw them in prison and throw away the key and make them listen to a Negro talking to himself," and then he explained that "Negro ... is a charming word."



"You folks know the Friedman family motto now: The Jews own the world, the Catholics run it, Protestants work it, and the Niggers and Mexicans enjoy it, basically, that's what they've done."



"I was run over by a bookmobile coming to the show this evening. They took me to the Ben Talb hospital now- when I came to the doctor told me, 'Kinky, we've had to give you a transfusion with the blood of a person of the Negro persuasion.' I said, 'well that's moderately unpleasant.' He said, 'well yes Kinky there's a good side to this, too. There's some good fringe benefits. Your welfare check will start coming in next month and your penis just grew 12 inches so these are some things you should think about...'"



"I went to a bowling alley. I couldn't go bowling, there were no bowling balls. The people here throw 'em all in the sea, thought they were nigger eggs…thought they were nigger eggs."



"I often encourage young people to go ahead and get into politics themselves. You see, I don't like young people, and if they become involved in that worthless tar baby that is politics, the more chance there is that maybe they'll leave me alone."



"The musicians and artists have mostly moved back to New Orleans now. The crackheads and the thugs have decided to stay. They want to stay here. I think they got their hustle on, and we need to get ours."



"The crackheads and thugs who remain in Houston after Katrina happen to be black; that's fact" followed a few days later by "I am not a racist, I am a realist. ... I never said what color their skin was. .... I'm smarter than that."



"All of these politicians are afraid of offending Hispanics. I want the border off the evening news until we get something resolved," but later "I want the border on the nightly news every night."


"My immigration policy is 'Remember the Alamo.'"


"Native Americans believe you can't really own land, a horse or a waterfall. The only thing they believe you can really own is a casino."



"I am going to see nondenominational prayer and the Ten Commandments put back in the schools."



"I'm not pro-life, and I'm not pro-choice. I'm pro-football."



"If you don't love Jesus, go to hell."



Discussing the reason why Kinky lost his last political election when he ran as a Republican "my inability to appeal to the religious right … torpedoed my candidacy."



"I've been stoned a lot of times... And I don't regret any of it. ... I quit doing cocaine when Bob Marley fell out of my left nostril."


"I am not anti-death penalty," but later (and under oath) "let's do away with the death penalty," and still later "I think there are people who need to die."



"I'm not a liberal, believe me. I'm a compassionate redneck, far more conservative than I am liberal."



"I was for Bush in 2004. He's a good man trapped in a Republican's body."



"Well, actually, I agree with most of political positions overseas, his foreign policy. … I basically think he played a poor hand well after September 11. What he’s been doing in the Near East and in the Middle East, he’s handling that well, I think."



"I voted for Gore," but when Kinky’s Kerr County voting records confirmed that he voted only in the 2004 general election but not in any other election since 1994, and that Kinky had lied about voting for Gore, Kinky said "The voting record doesn't look strong, but my voting record is better than Dick Cheney's."


"All the little issues you're talking about are all (expletive). It's all (expletives). That's the key. Okay, I mean, you can talk about, 'And I would deregulate this; and my plans is to give a seven percent raise on the textbook.' It's all (expletive) because the people who are doing this are crooks and they're corrupt and they don't give a (expletive) about the people of Texas. That's the truth."



"I'm still not sure I want to be governor."