Should I go out in a blaze of glory?

[LeftyFingerPop]

My life fell apart today.

Vicodin and beer.

Lots of it.

Should I flame out?

I always push the envelope....work and play....always have.

Should I just fucking finally flame out?

Let me tell you....I am one hell of a good man. But I seem to get involved with people who fucking hate my guts. I have done shit you would not believe...good shit.

But, I don't boast. In here anyway.

That being said, I have some good friends who would kill for me.

I could tell you some things....

I have been in love. I'm not a casual sex type of guy....never have been.

I have been disillusioned this evening.,..see we can't always be perfect, me included. I have plenty of faults...but my actions serve me well and prove that I am good.

There are a lot of pricks in this world, but I am not one of them.

See, life has gotten too much for me. But this is not a suicide thread. I would never do that.

I do, however, want to help it along. I live a rough lifestyle...and no matter how caring or good I try to be...people disappoint me.

I hate what this country has become, and I hate how people treat each other. When you think you have found love, something slaps you in the dick and says "nope...you will get hurt".

And then people change on you and fuck you hard. And I mean HARD.

Then, you are left there in smoldering ruins.

So, should I flame out, or go out easy someday?

I don't know.

But, I'll tell ya this...if I did not have my mom to care for, I would be taking some risks and having some fun.

Because, fun is rare.

I've had it recently, but it's all gone now.