Reply #41: I got the "You don't understand" response for the first time

[YankeyMCC]

last night from my 11 year old (12 next month) son.

The struggle lately has been his commitment to school work. I mean that when he does the work he does fine, better than fine in most areas, but he's constantly forgetting assignments, or just not turning things in. He's growing his hair our, asked for (and we allowed) an are piercing and has gotten very involved with his guitar work...meanwhile schoolwork has suffered. So no real mystery. Of course his mother and I are going through a divorce so I'm sure there's an element of that contributing to all this, but that has been going on for a year now and it's only been the last couple of months that the school work has really suffered. Which is when the guitar obsession really started too.

Anyway, last night while talking to him about taking school seriously he blurts out strongly, the way self-righteous teenagers can, that I just don't understand.

I looked him in the eye and said (as millions, billions of parents before me have in one way or another done before me) "Oh yes I do. More than you know. I was a boy of 11 once and I remember it well. No matter how embarrassing, how bad, how weird you think any thought you have or thing you do may be I've thought or done the same thing and I know why those thoughts come to you and why those things you'll do will make sense at the time. I understand." ;)