My first shamanic journey

[GliderGuider]

I'm very new to the spiritual path in general, having spent the first 57 years of my life as a hard-nosed anti-spiritual atheist. A year and a half ago that all changed, and the next step in my path is revealing itself at a ferocious rate right now. I never thought shamanism would be a part of it -- Zen Buddhism and Deep Ecology were about my limits. Then the following events unfolded:

I spent last weekend at a facilitators' training workshop for delivering the Awakening the Dreamer Symposium developed by a group called the Pachamama Alliance. I saw the Symposium back in October and it knocked me flat on my butt. It was everything I'd been looking for in terms of a full awareness of the unfolding global crisis and the transformational response to it. I signed up for training the next week, and last weekend spent two days at a retreat camp in Ancaster learning how to deliver it.

The training turned out to be much more than that for me, though. There were 73 facilitator trainees, from all walks of life and all sorts of spiritual paths, and the training was also designed as a container for our personal growth. On Saturday night after the formal session was over, we had a social evening with sacred circle dancing, a drumming circle and a shamanic walk. During the drumming circle a massive thunderstorm moved in, and stayed throughout the shamanic journey. When I came back from the journey I was forever changed.

I don't know how familiar you are with shamanic journeying, so here's a good description of it: http://www.shamanlinks.net/Journey.htm

Here's a description of mine:

I have had a call. It came from Pachamama and all the life on the planet, and I heard it so clearly at the training weekend that I couldn't stand against it.

Two months ago I had a spontaneous vision of being a shaman in the ancient Andes, while at the same time being his totem animal the condor (which is a vulture) and a woman in his village. I saw through their eyes as they looked at each other, and each time I looked back at myself.

Last Saturday night I went on a shamanic journey, the first time I'd ever done that deliberately. As I lay on the floor of the lodge and the lightning flashed and the thunder rolled in time to the drums, I saw myself sitting at the back of my parents' farm, in the exact spot where I intend to do my vision quest this summer. A turkey vulture soared low over me and lifted me up. It flew me to the Upper World, where I met with my ancestors and spirit guides. They included the shaman from my previous vision, my sister Cara, my first wife Janice, my grandparents and a spirit guide named Sarah that I met last summer, standing in front of a host of others. I told them I was conflicted about my call from Pachamama and the fact that I had this undischarged obligation to The Inner Journey (a psycho-spiritual transformational group, I was their reluctant Marketing Coordinator until last night). Could I serve two masters when I was not engaged with one of them? They simply smiled and said I already knew the answer, that I had to speak my heart.

So now I am betrothed to Pachamama, and want with all my heart to become an instrument of her healing, by healing those who are wounding her either deliberately or unknowingly. I will do that with the Awakening the Dreamer symposium, which I realized today is a cleverly disguised shamanic tool.

It's an extremely powerful experience, and I now understand why shamanism has survived in the shadow of organized religion for thousands of years. I've never had a call before. The sure sense of purpose is totally humbling.

It's funny the way life works. Last night when I told them that I was giving up my marketing role, and why, the whole Inner Journey Coordinating Circle realized that the IJ was just my launching pad, not my landing strip. It was the first time I'd thought about it in those terms, and it helped quiet the voices of my inner judges. The Inner Journey gave me the healing, clarity and strength to hear the call. Now I have to honour that call.

Namaste,
Bodhisantra