Republican men, thinking of running for public office? A Patriotic primer.

[AlCzervik]

So you're a republican and you think it's your time to run for office eh, well if you follow this step by step instruction manual you may just win your parties nomination.

1.) get married, lets face, if you're a republican and not married people will talk, so after a quick visit to Hannidate you'll be off to the races.

your bride should wear this on your wedding day-


You should be wearing this-


your cake complete with mini Patriot missiles!


what you'll wear on your honeymoon that will be within the contiguous united states, Alaska and Hawaii are not attached, they might as well be France cause you ain't going!



What your bride will be swimming in.


and what you'll fantasize about but like a good republican you'll wait until after you're married and find someone to pay to wear these.


2) Honeymoon is over, get busy.

the bed you'll be having man on top get over with quick sex and she better have a boy, am i right or am i right?


The clothing your son will be wearing


3) this is important, you need some type of lawn ornament that really closes the deal---



that'll do nicely.

Ok you're all set, now get going, time's a wasting and we're not getting any freer with you just sitting there!