Reply #20: How old is he and how resistant is he to peer pressure

[nichomachus]

Those are key questions.

The morning chapel is the least of your worries. It's easy for him to not go to that -- unless they start using it to make announcements that your son needs to know about or choose up teams for activities later in the day. They do that as a way of making sure kids show up.

However, the peer pressure at these things is intense. Most adolescents really want to belong, and when kids start grouping up, other kids want to be included in the group. That, of course, requires doing things that they do -- group prayer, bible study, whatever.

It can be very seductive. At first, it doesn't seem so bad, but before you know it, you're joining in all the "activities" that your group is doing. One thing they do is just exclude the non-conformist from everything -- "sorry, this is only for the guys in our prayer group" -- few kids can put up with the isolation.

Would you let your kid go to an unchaperoned party where you knew there was alcohol being served? This isn't far different.