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Chastity... the most unnatural of all the sexual perversions. -- Aldous Huxley
One half of the world cannot understand the pleasures of the other. -- Jane Austen
Well, to start with, there's that whole multiple thing.
Give me chastity and continence -- but not yet. -- Saint Augustine
Sex is one of the most wholesome, beautiful and natural experiences that money can buy. -- Steve Martin
My wife is a sex object. Evertime I ask for sex, she objects. -- Les Dawson
I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own. -- Woody Allen
I'm glad I'm not bisexual. I couldn't stand being rejected by men as well as women. -- Bernard Manning
I chased a girl for two years only to discover that her tastes were exactly like mine: We were both crazy about girls. -- Groucho Marx
It is impossible to obtain a conviction for sodomy from an English jury. Half of them don't believe that it can physically be done, and the other half are doing it. -- Winston Churchill
]A nymphomaniac is a woman as obsessed with sex as the average man. -- Mignon McLaughlin
I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between five, it's fantastic. -- Woody Allen
There is nothing wrong with making love with the light on. Just make sure the car door is closed. -- George Burns
Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go it's a pretty good one. -- Woody Allen
Don't have sex man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start talking to them. -- Steve Martin
The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money costs less. -- Brendan Francis
Let's forget about the six feet and talk about the seven inches. -- Mae West, on being told that a new male acquaintance was 6'7"
Don't knock masturbation -- it's sex with someone I love. -- Woody Allen
Outside of every thin woman is a fat man trying to get in. -- Katherine Whitehorn
I like to wake up each morning feeling a new man. -- Jean Harlow
Graze on my lips; and if those hills be dry, / Stray lower, where the pleasant fountains lie. -- William Shakespeare
If God had intended us not to masturbate, He would have made our arms shorter. -- George Carlin
I want to tell you a terrific story about oral contraception. I asked this girl to sleep with me and she said "no." -- Woody Allen
I regret to say that we of the FBI are powerless to act in cases of oral-genital intimacy, unless it has in some way obstructed interstate commerce. -- J. Edgar Hoover
Sex between a man and a woman can be wonderful -- provided you get between the right man and the right woman. -- Woody Allen
Love is the answer; but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions. -- Woody Allen
Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope. -- George Burns
A man's only as old as the woman he feels. -- Groucho Marx
Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot. -- Groucho Marx
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