Betty Bowers: "What's that you say - Mrs. Robertson?" ...

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From the glorious Betty Bowers website: Protecting the Sanctity of Divorce from the Homos ... http://bettybowers.com/sanctity5.html

What does Mrs. Pat Robertson do to spark a lil luvin from God's very own humble spokesman, the 'Right' Reverend Pat Robertson ?? ..


Mrs. Pat Robertson:
Larry Flynt Has Nothing on the Lord: Using Bible Porn to Get Even a Homo Hot For Your Moist Lady Parts!


Looking for a way to spice up your marriage with erotica, but wish to avoid the embarrassment of running into Pastor at your local adult bookstore? So many Christians forget that pornography is no further away than their nearest family Bible!

Do what I do when I want to get Pat in the mood. I slip out of peek-a-boo flannel teddy, draw a Calgon bath and whisper in Pat's furry, good ear about how Oholibah "lusted after her paramours whose penises were the size of donkeys and whose ejaculations were as copious as horses." Ezekiel 23:20

Then, to get things really hot-hot-hot, I rat my hair like Bathsheba, drizzle myrrh-oil between my breasts and whip out the heavy artillary -- Song of Solomon:


He shall lie all night betwixt my breasts. 1:13

Our heroine takes her lover into her mother's bedroom and asks not to be disturbed till he please. 3:4-5

Thy two breasts are like two young roes that are twins. 4:5, 7:3

Thy breasts shall be as clusters of the vine. 7:8

I sat down under his shadow with great delight, and his fruit was sweet to my taste. 2:3

There are threescore queens, and fourscore concubines, and virgins without number. 6:8

(And in case he missed the bit about my fabulous titties:)

We have a little sister, and she hath no breasts ... But my breasts like towers. 8:8, 10

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1. Added The First Lady ...

Mrs. George W. ("Laura") Bush:

"All these gays being happy has poisonous effects on heterosexual marriage that are almost impossible to exaggerate. Who knows how many normal American husbands have been thrown into the arms of secretaries, hookers and the Governor of Texas just because a pack of thoughtless homos squealed, "I do"? For example, my marriage to Bushie has withstood two messy decades of waking up in enormous pools or each other's bourbon and Buffalo chicken wings sick, a father-in-law with a State Department chickadee on the side and a brother-in-law with more Asian call girls than Mel Gibson's trailer. But, I'm telling you, if one more lezzie ties the knot, as William Bennett would say, all bets are off!"

http://bettybowers.com/sanctity4a.html

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2. Chimes in Lynne Cheney ...

Mrs. Richard ("Lynne") Cheney:

"As the mother of one and a half daughters, I don't want either of my girls to have a wedding where the bridesmaids wear studded-denim or settle who gets the bridal bouquet over a foul-mouthed game of pool. But if the specter of losing an inheritance of millions of off-shore Halliburton dough earned from swindling the Treasury can't get my little Dennis-the-Menace look-alike in heels, I'm not sure fiddle-farting with that darn Constitution will either!" .

http://bettybowers.com/sanctity3a.html

[Jade Fox]

3. All Hail Betty Bowers!!

Funny stuff.

[AlCzervik]

4. Betty is the best

i love the Laure Bush fashion thing. And What would Jenna drink?