DUBIOUS (THE NAKED TRUTH): "The Emperor's New Suit" updated

[Cartooner]

DUBIOUS (THE NAKED TRUTH) part xiii
an alleGORY
“…and it will set you free”
by Cartooner

Wild kaleidoscopic colors splashed about bathing the whole world of Emperor George Dubious Botch, and they bade him to cast forward his imaginings of what would mark his second term (though couched in an especially more simplified vulgate language). He thought of a tighter Patriot Act. 1. He envisioned lengthy jail time for his vocal critics; with, perhaps, capital punishment for the Rathers among the free press corp. 2. He lovingly and lingeringly fantasized about a gloriously intensifying reputation that inspires naught but religious awe and zeal among his followers, and requires respect among nearly everyone else. and 3. His thoughts adventured and spread to aspirations of world crusades to successfully banish all evil nations of the world (such as France and Germany), and ...BUT THEN …

"Eeeeyiii!" exclaimed Dubious as a precipitous change in the overall milieu took Dubious by complete surprise. A purgatorial orange melted into a Hades red and thence to equally repulsive flames and sizzling smoke. And materializing in the midst of all that smoke and flames was the figure of a man dressed in nineteenth century garb. "I must be dreaming, right?" Dubious asked the man. "Who are you, by the way?"

Uttering not so much as a whispered syllable, the strange man only smiled. But then unpredictably he moved his hand as though writing something in the air.

"M-I-L-L-A-R-D", Dubious deciphered. "Mallard? You a duck hunter?" Dubious wanted to know.

The strange man shook his head, and resumed spelling. F-I-L-L-M-O-R-E.

"A dentist?" guessed Dubious. "Heavy machines?"

Just then, the strange man magically produced a large sign. On it were the words "THANKS --FOR TAKING OVER BOTTOM SPOT". And then the strange man smiled an insane smile.

"I've gotta be dreaming,” muttered Dubious, more and more befuddled. Then smoke swirled up around the mysterious figure and when at last it cleared away, he was gone. In place of the strange man was a huge flat screen computer monitor, large as the front of the Library of Congress. On the screen Dubious could see old people and young mothers in abject poverty. Ragged children trying to learn in schools with no books, no teachers and no pencils or paper, but with these words on the chalkboard, “No Child Left Behind.”

Then, unaccountably, though at first beginning softly, Dubious could barely discern a voice that seemed to constantly change in tone and timbre saying "Dubious, Dubious, Dubious". Pictures of soldiers dying in their mothers' arms flashed up on the monitor. Innocent children maimed from detonated car bombs morphed into exploding oil wells, and then into a stern teacher hovering above. "DUBIOUS! DUBIOUS! DUBIOUS!!" the teacher kept repeating.

But then, Dubious saw the screen images change to something far more frightening. For, there, administered by the Chief Justice was his opponent taking the oath of office. HIS OPPONENT!!! But … the oath was indeed a strange one. It went … like this:

JUSTICE: "I, Dubious' opponent"

OPPONENT: "I, DUBIOUS' OPPONENT"

JUSTICE: "do solemnly swear at him"

OPPONENT: "DO SOLEMNLY SWEAR AT HIM"

JUSTICE: "for being naughty."

OPPONENT: "FOR BEING NAUGHTY."

JUSTICE: "I pledge to expose all his bad deeds,"

OPPONENT: "I PLEDGE TO EXPOSE ALL HIS BAD DEEDS,"

JUSTICE: “and take away his toys.”

OPPONENT: “AND TAKE AWAY HIS TOYS.”

Strangely, the Justice‘s voice now raised up an octave to a woman‘s voice. It went on: “He would not wake up, and he’s a loser”

OPPONENT: “HE WOULD NOT WAKE UP, AND HE’S A LOSER”

WOMAN JUSTICE: “He’s a loser, and he will not wake up.”

OPPONENT: “HE’S A LOSER, AND HE WILL NOT WAKE UP.”

And with that, Dubious began to cry. He didn’t want to be a loser. He was a bad boy, but “WAKE UP!” he REALLY didn’t. He liked being the emperor. People admired and worshipped him “WAKE UP!!!” and he doted on that oh so extravagantly! Suddenly Dubious opened his eyes (literally, not figuratively). His face was wet with tears. Mrs. Dubious was shaking him with repeated admonishings. “Wake up, Dubious. You’re supposed to give another speech, don’t you remember?”

“Hmm?” asked Dubious, gathering his senses. “Oh, . . . sure. ‘We’re on the road to the future and we’re not turning back.’ Isn’t that the one?”

Mrs. Dubious nodded a kindly nod. “You were dreaming.”

“Whew,” gasped Dubious. “Yeah. Glad it was only a nightmare. Wonder if it means anything.”
(Let me know if you'd like earlier episodes.)