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Edited on Mon Sep-08-03 04:44 PM by oneighty
when Seagulls are flying above you. I am pulling my crab traps. I empty the traps of the old rotten fish (Menhaden) which is used to attract the crabs. I have several bushels of fresh frozen Menhaden with which I rebait the crab traps. Hungry seagulls follow the boat, swooping down onto the water, eating the discarded bait.
Tricia, my wife, is throwing fresh bait up into the air. She watches the gulls catch the fish in mid air. Soon a whole flock of gulls are circling above the boat waiting their turn. "Tricia do not feed the gulls like that." I yell at her.
Meanwhile back at the crab dock an entrepreneur is hard at work developing crabless crabcakes. She is using Flounder meat in place of crab meat. Flounder is far cheaper than crab meat. It had been determined by people that know about those things, that most people like crabcakes because of the spices, and cannot tell the difference in flavor between fishcakes or crabcakes. It is legal to do this. All that is necessary is to state in the lable (In very fine print) that fish has been used in place of crab meat.
Back aboard the crab boat Tricia is still throwing fish up into the air, feeding the gulls. About that time a Seagull poops on my head, splat. Tricia says "Oh!" I say "Oh shit!" The seagull laughs. But that is why you should never look up with your mouth open when Seagulls are overhead.
On the way back to the dock a Pelican is sitting on top of a waterway marker. I say "Hello Pelican" The Pelican turns his butt to me, bends over. Tricia is laughing "Pelican just told you to kiss his ass"
Tricia still laughs about that day. I do too, but not very hard.
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