Chief Justice John Marshall is a P-I-M-P

[St. Jarvitude]

Check out that fine ass.



Sorry, I needed a distraction from slaving away at my AP US History notes.

:argh: :argh:

Some random excerpts from my notes:

V. Shays's Rebellion
...
Unfortunately, the Federal government was too late and Shays' land had ceded from the Union, calling his new nation "The Principality Formerly Known as Massachussetts". To this day, relations between the U.S. and "Þ" are strained and filled with tension.
...


3. Creating the Executive Branch
a. The Cabinet
All-star Cabinet:
SecState Thomas "Jungle Fever" Jefferson; SecWar Henry "Fort" Knox; SecTreas Alexander "Money" Hamilton; Attorney General Edmund "Who's that?" Randolph

D. FYI - George Washington
Had a girly fear of covered bridges; shot the family dog, Arthur; was "Father" of the country despite fathering no children. (Source: http://rowboatvets.com/)

D. FYI - John Adams
- Named son (John Quincy Adams) after his farm. Creepy...... (this one is actually true!)
- Was in fact madly in love with Thomas Jefferson. A series of manuscripts for a romance novel titled "The Executor" was found recently among his belongings. It featured two characters named "Adam Johnson" and "Jefferey Thompson" who found themselves in several bizarre S&M situations.
- Had a tremendous nose. (according to caricature)

(Yes, all twelves pages of my notes that I have done so far are this riddled with utter bullshit... sue me)

[JohnKleeb]

1. Wait I think I have the same textbook

Ben Franklin slept with all sorts of women FYI too, ahh 11th grade english class with segal, where would I be without thou.

[gavodotcom]

2. Henry "the Ox" Knox ;)

From Knox's personal diary accounting that fateful night Washington crossed the Delaware.

As Washington stepped into his boat, he tapped Knox with his boot and said, "Shift that fat ass, Harry, but slowly, or you'll swamp the damn boat."

From Don't Know Much About History by Kenneth C. Davis

I doubt I'll ever pick up any other trivia tidbit about Knox in my life, but, knowing this, does that really matter?

[St. Jarvitude]

3. Another gem from my notes:

If I don't get an A for humor on this...

(from a section on the Louisiana Purchase/Lewis+Clark)


Much to Jefferson's dismay, however, that numbnut Clark left the maps at that rest stop on the Snake River. D'OH!!!!!! So, Thomas Jefferson invented the steam-powered airplane and flew back to get it.
But it turns out it was in Lewis' pants back pocket the whole time. Lewis, embarrassed beyond mortal comprehension, stole Jefferson's Airplane, and with the help of Adam's Aliens turned it into Jefferson's Starship, which he flew to Venus in a suicide attempt.