What makes people pissed off for no apparent reason?

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

What is it with gratuitous rudeness and anger these days?

I'm at Menard's this afternoon to buy curtain rods and some other hardware-type stuff. And I've got a shopping cart and I'm stuck in a narrow aisle, and there's this woman in front of me looking at some mini-blinds. There's somebody behind me in the aisle, too, so I can't back up and go around to the next aisle. So I just stand there, and wait for the woman to finish looking at the blinds. And I wait, and wait some more, while she apparently doesn't notice I'm there. Finally I say, politely, "Excuse me, could I please move around you?" Although all she would have to do is walk about five feet to the end of the aisle to let me by, she gives me a look that could curdle gin and snaps, "Well, you can just go back the other way!" I said, "I'm sorry, I can't; there's someone behind me." So she lets me by, but hisses "Bitch!" as I go past her. I smile and say, "I'm really sorry I inconvenienced you. Merry Christmas." To which she replies, this time more loudly, "Bitch!" and stomps away.

I can't for the life of me figure out what I did to get her going. Such an inconsequential little thing this was... you just have to wonder what sets people off. It must suck big-time to be her.

[lizziegrace]

1. I wish I knew

I saw so much anger and animosity working in retail on Christmas Eve that I never wanted to deal with people again. I used to believe that most anger really had a basis in fear. But more and more, I think people are either born mean or rewarded somehow and it reinforced mean behavior. Life is too damn short.

Sorry you had to come face to face with someone like her today.

:hug:

[Deja Q]

2. 'Not feeling content' comes to mind.

And since humans are a random sort of critter, one has to ask the pissed off person WHY (s)he is not feeling content.

[rateyes]

3. Mean people suck! nt

[dryan]

6. I think...

that thee is an inceasingly lack of public civility anymore. People seem to think that its okay to act and speak in public anyway they want.

[rateyes]

9. Yeah...and

it's only going to get worse, IMHO. I tell you, as for myself, I'm tolerant with everyone except the intolerant (mean) people. If I know someone is being mean, they will hear it from me--there is no excuse for being mean.

[amitten]

26. Yeah...she probably just got out of posting on GD.

Are they evil on purpose? Just askin'. :grr:

[Nevernose]

4. Who wants to go through life that way?

My intitial reaction to these folks is usually shock and disbelief, followed later by anger, and then I just feel sorry for them. Perhaps people like this find some enjoyment in being angry at people? Some kind of neural hardwiring or chemical imbalance, perhaps combined with the environment they werwe raised in? Certain sub-cultures, even in America, tend to emphasize hostility as an appropriate inital response.

I've spent years in amateur analysis of my now ex-wife (along with everyone, friend or family, who has ever known her), and determined that she's only happy, in terms of mentla pleasure, when she's angry. Anything that would make a normal person feel extremes of happiness or anger instead make her feel anger, and after the anger fades she's realtively chipper.

Of course, I doubt that either of us knows the lady at the Menard's very well, so instead of psychoanalyzing her, I'll just assume she was having a bad day.

[Dave Reynolds]

5. I'm sure it was

the dizzying selection of miniblinds that had her vexed, and her vexation caused her to vent at the closest person.

Either that, or she was just nasty.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

7. I think the latter.

Menard's doesn't have a very good selection of miniblinds -- no excuse there.

But man, she was nasty. It was kind of like reaching out to pet what you think is a friendly dog and it turns out to be a rabid wolverine.

[Corgigal]

8. OMG me too

I find it just a damn rude thing to do but leave a cart while it blocks other shoppers. Nothing will make my New York appear faster then that stupidity.

I thought I was the only person who ever felt that way.

[Baclava]

10. You should have stabbed her in the head...

...30 or 40 times.

[LisaL]

11. Oh lordy. You are way too nice.

If she called me a bitch, I would be bitching right back at her.
She has got a problem, not you, so don't even worry about it.

[Hardrada]

12. Would "Happy Hannukah" have worked?

Or Happy Belated Solstice Wish?

[uppityperson]

13. lots of people have personal worries, jobs, family, war, money

Be ever so polite and just keep going.

[Rabrrrrrr]

14. Lack of emotional and psychological maturity

and probably some spiritual emptiness, but that's usually caused by just beiung too fucking dumb to figure out what the hell is actually important in life, a result of being emotionally and psychologically immature.

[NMMNG]

15. "Well, you can just go back the other way!"

I would have looked her straight in the eye and said, "And maybe you can stop taking up the entire aisle--you aren't alone in this store". I'm generally polite as can be to people, but that sort of unprovoked rudeness is unwarranted.

[Wapsie B]

16. Sounds like she's got a few anger issues.

Way to go to not get sucked into her misery. Something tells me she lives for that.

[SeattleGirl]

17. Oy! People like that are awful!

I've had people do things like that to me, when I was polite to them. I try to ignore the rudeness and not return it when possible, but sometimes I can't help myself. I was in my neighborhood mom-n-pop store once, walking around the counter. This girl was coming toward me, and being right-handed, my instinct is to move right, but I couldn't because the counter was right there. She could have moved aside but didn't. She just gave me a dirty look. So I said, "Oh, get over yourself!" There were about 6 other people in the store, and they all started laughing at her. Bwahahahahaha!

[GoddessOfGuinness]

18. Bravo to you

for maintaining your civility.

Apparently your politeness really struck a raw nerve in her. She probably doesn't like herself very much, else she wouldn't reject your magnanimous apology.

[sasquatch]

19. I think it's the area sometimes

Like when I'm in GD I notice alot of people (myself included)get a little bit more aggressive than normal.

[RevCheesehead]

20. It wasn't about you - it was about her.

People lash out for any number of reasons. Anger usually masks pain, and people in pain lash out without realizing they are hurting anyone else.

You were graciously polite and forgiving. Bless you.

[Beausoir]

21. Lack of sex.

Really. If she is THAT fixated on curtain RODS, she is in desperate need.

[CanuckAmok]

22. Oh, fuck you! What a stupid fucking question.

What makes you think people get pissed off for no apparent reason?! That's just fucking naive.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

23. Excuse me?

I'm sorry to have offended you. Merry Christmas!

[CanuckAmok]

25. I can't deal with this rignt now... I'm way too pissed off!

And for no apparent reason.

:hi:

[jpgray]

24. I've invented a working sarcasm deflector. You want in? (nt)