I had to call Mr. Hitler today...how was your day?

[AlienGirl]

I work in a market research company; I'm that person who calls you during dinner to ask questions about your vacation or your level of satisfaction with your local gym. The way it works is I get a list of names and phone numbers on my computer, and I call them and ask annoying questions. I've had to call people with odd names before, but today's strange name took the cake: T.G. Hitler. Mr. Hitler was home and is, in fact, actually named T---- G--- Hitler. He's in the phone book and everything. Have you ever tried to do a survey with someone named Mr. Hitler? It isn't easy.

And how was your day?

Tucker

[SeattleGirl]

1. Nothing quite as interesting as that, AG

Other than that, how are you? It was so nice to meet you the other night! :hi:

[Heidi]

3. There's my grrrrrl.

:hug: :loveya: :*SMOOCH!:*

[SeattleGirl]

12. Wow!!!!!! Heidi, gf!

:* :* :*
:loveya: :loveya: :loveya:

[AlienGirl]

4. Eh, I'm OK

It was great to meet you too! :hi:

Tucker

[Oeditpus Rex]

2. I never actually called him

But I did help deliver a few packages to his home.

[AlienGirl]

7. Excellent!

[Heidi]

8. It's the pilot fantasy again, isn't it, OR?

[Oeditpus Rex]

15. It ain't a fantasy

And I wasn't a pilot. I was a navigator or radio operator.

But if you mean WWI, then, yeah — it's just a fun thing.

I woulda flamed Snoopy's beagle ass, too. The Camel was a difficult plane to fly. Me and my Fokker D.VII would've flown rings around him.

[Heidi]

17. Oooooooooooooookie-dokie.

[AlienGirl]

18. Weird stuff happens

[Heidi]

20. Truer words were never spoken.

:hi: Tucker!

[AlienGirl]

21. Woot!

:hi:

[UncleSepp]

30. Amen to that. Weird stuff happens.

[AlienGirl]

32. What are the odds... I mean really...I should buy a lotto ticket

[XemaSab]

5. I'm getting the giggles from this!

I can't imagine...

I read somewhere that before the war there were 42 Hitlers in the NY phone book, and after the war there were none.

It would be odd to learn that your family name used to be Hitler. :scared:

[AlienGirl]

6. Now imagine asking him:

"Mr. Hitler, do you plan to take a cruise this year, and if not, why not?"

Tucker

[XemaSab]

9. Tell me that you weren't able to keep a straight face through this!!!!

:rofl:

[AlienGirl]

10. Of course I wasn't!

:rofl:

I still have Mr. Hitler's phone number, too...

Tucker

[XemaSab]

11. Call him at 3 AM and ask if his

wehrmacht is running...

[AlienGirl]

14. Beer-monitor interface!!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[BlueIris]

13. Oh, my God, A.G. That is insane.

Well, I mean, lots of people have that last name, but still. For a Progressive at this time, that must have been hard.

[AlienGirl]

16. What I wonder is why he hasn't changed his name?!

It takes something like eighty bucks and a trip to the courthouse to change one's name; who would keep a name that's been sullied to that level? I hope if he has kids he doesn't saddle them with it!

Tucker

[Oeditpus Rex]

19. I cannot resist

In the corner are three German generals in full Nazi uniform, poring over a map.

Hilter: Ach. Ha! Gut time, er, gut afternoon.

Landlady: Oho, planning a little excursion, eh, Mr Hilter?

Hilter: Ja, ja, ve haff a little... (to Bimmler) was ist Abweise bewegen?

Bimmler: Hiking.

Hilter: Ah yes, ve make a little *hike* for Bideford.

Johnson: Ah yes. Well, you'll want the A39. Oh, no, you've got the wrong map there. This is Stalingrad. You want the Ilfracombe and Barnstaple section.

Hilter: Ah! Stalingrad! Ha ha ha, Heinri... Reginald, you have the wrong map here you silly old leg-before-vicket English person.

Bimmler: I'm sorry mein Fuhrer, mein... mein Dickie old chum.

Landlady: Oh, lucky Mr Johnson pointed that out. You wouldn't have had much fun in Stalingrad, would you? Ha ha. (stony silence) I said, you wouldn't have had much fun in Stalingrad, would you?

Hilter: (bitterly) Not much fun in Stalingrad, no.

Landlady: Oh I'm sorry. I didn't introduce you. This is Ron. Ron Vibbentrop.

Johnson: Oh, not Ron Vibbentrop, eh?

Vibbentrop: Nein! Nein! Oh. Ha ha. Different other chap. I in Somerset am being born. Ron Vibbentrop is born Gotterdammerstrasse 46, Dusseldorf Vest 8... so they say!

Landlady: And this is the quiet one, Heinrich Bimmler.

Bimmler: Pleased to meet you, squire. I also am not of Minehead being born but I in your Peterborough Lincolnshire was given birth to. But am staying in Peterborough Lincolnshire house all time during vor, due to jolly old running sores, and vos unable to go in the streets or to go visit football matches or go to Nuremburg. Ha ha. Am retired vindow cleaner and pacifist, without doing war crimes. Oh... and am glad England vin Vorld Cup. Bobby Charlton. Martin Peters. And eating I am lots of chips and fish and hole in the toads and Dundee cakes on Piccadilly Line, don't you know old chap, vot! And I vos head of Gestapo for ten years. (Hilter elbows him in the ribs) Ah! Five years! (Hilter elbows him again, harder) Nein! No! Oh. NOT head of Gestapo AT ALL! I was not, I make joke!

Landlady: Oh, Mr Bimmler. You do have us on! (Telephone rings) Oh excuse me. I'd better get that.

Johnson: How long are you down here for, Mr Hilter, just the fortnight?

Hilter: Vot you ask that for, are you a spy? Get on against the wall, Britischer Pig, you are going to die!

Bimmler: Take it easy, Dickie old chum!

Vibbentrop: He's a bit on edge, Mr Johnson, he hasn't slept since 1945.

Hilter: Shut your cake-hole, you Nazi!

Vibbentrop: Cool it, Fuhrer cat!

Bimmler: Ha ha, the fun we have!

Johnson: Haven't I seen you on the television?

Hilter, Vibbentrop, & Bimmler: (hastily) Nicht. Nein. No.

Johnson: Simon Dee show, or was it Frosty?

Hilter, Vibbentrop, & Bimmler: Nein. No.

Landlady: Telephone, Mr Hilter. It's Mr McGoering from the Bell and Compasses. He says he's found a place where you can hire bombers by the hour...?

Hilter: If he opens his big mouth again, it's Lapschig time!

Bimmler: Shut up! Ha ha, hire bombers! He's a joker, that Scottish person.

Vibbentrop: Good old Norman!

Landlady: (to Johnson) He's on the phone the whole time now.

Johnson: In business, is he?

Bimmler: Soon, baby!

Landlady: Of course it's his big day Thursday. They've been planning it for months.

Johnson: What's happening Thursday then?

Landlady: Well it's the North Minehead by-election. Mr Hilter's standing as the National Bocialist. He's got wonderful plans for Minehead!

Johnson: Like what?

Landlady: Well, for a start he wants to annex Poland.

[AlienGirl]

24. "I don't like the sound of those boncentration bamps..."

[Oeditpus Rex]

25. 'I gave him my baby to kiss, and he bit it!'

[hfojvt]

22. I wouldn't have done it

I would have asked if Eva was home.

Kinda surprising. I just did a search and there were only 15 people named Hitler in the 1930 census. On the other hand there were 593 people named Pancake, 14 named Eggs, and, of course, 15,802 named Bacon, 1,785 named Orange, 9 named Juice, 33,241 named French and 10 named Toast.

Anyone for breakfast? :donut:
(there were no people named donut, but 3,784 named Coffee.)

[AlienGirl]

23. Do you suppose he gets that a lot?

Mr. Hitler's got a listed number, I wonder if he gets a lot of prank phone calls?

Tucker

[everythingsxen]

26. I have reservations about Hitler.....

He has a table for two at 8 o'clock.

[ScreamingMeemie]

27. I used to do surveys on how happy one could be with their seatbelt.

Actual Question:

"Is the finish on your seatbelt glossy, or is it matte?" :crazy:

many...Many people would actually put the phone down and go look. It was painful.


I would have giggled my way through a survey with Mr. Hitler. :hi:

[AlienGirl]

29. Oh man...I wonder if Mr. Hitler has a glossy seatbelt?

[Crazy Dave]

28. How about this poor guy: "Yes, Mr. Bomber, what can we do for you?"

This guy got a pre-approved credit card offer with the name "Palestinian Bomber". When he called the card company to complain, two operators said, "Yes, Mr. Bomber, what can we do for you?".

http://msnbc.msn.com/id/9069423/

[flamingyouth]

31. I'm surprised he hasn't changed his name.

I can't imagine going through life with a name like that. I know a woman whose brother is named Ted Bundy. :scared: