My seven year old is home with a cough. He insists it's whooping cough

[LaraMN]

which, he also insists, is "usually" fatal.

:eyes:

I got him a piece of paper and a marker to write out his last will and testament. I told him I want his bike.

He said I'm mean. I told him he's going back to school on Monday.


:P

[Maddy McCall]

1. Awwww....

How can you not laugh?! :rofl:

This is too damned funny, Lara. :D You have a very smart, precocious child, you know, and the rest of his years in your home will be hell for you. ;-)

[LaraMN]

5. He's an angel for the crap that he tolerates from me.

He already recognizes that I have a rather dark sense of humor. I love that kid!

[ET Awful]

2. LMAO

That's one hell of a kid :P

"usually fatal" . . . .:rofl:

[LaraMN]

7. Yeah, he even tops my four-year-old drama queen,

and she tries REALLY hard!

[bbernardini]

3. WHOOP! Mom, I'm sick! WHOOP! Mom, I'm sick! (repeat to hip-hop beat)

[Benfea]

4. Nice response! ;) Although I would have told him...

…that if it's really whooping cough, he has to let out a whoop and flap his arms like a chicken every time he coughs, or else it's not really whooping cough. ;)

[SOteric]

6. I think he must mean

"Whuppin' Cough." Which means if he isn't back in school on Monday, he's in for a Whuppin'.

:hi: Hope he's better soon.

[LaraMN]

8. Pretty much! I can't tolerate ANOTHER day of listening to him

argue ridiculous subjects with his little sister. I'm running out of good punishments.

Incidentally, he is the WORST liar, ever. He just tried to tell me that he "DID NOT" call his sister a "stinkin' little turd," and he couldn't even LOOK at me! I had to try not to laugh at his hideously transparent "stealth" tactics.

[miss_american_pie]

9. Friends of mine had whooping cough over the summer

And they are in Minnesota. They did all survive.

When I'm mean to my kid, he makes this dramatic "mommy, we're breaking up" pronouncement, then stomps off.

[radwriter0555]

16. Mine just yells "THAT'S BAD PARENTING!" and stomps off...

Good times... good times.

[radwriter0555]

17. "Knock it off or you're going to get DECAF" the wise ass daughter of my

wombs' fatalistic words one day, when, at age 9 I sent her down to the cafe to fetch coffee...

We were in Playa del Carmen, MX, at Xmas with a family friend. No room service, and coffee IS essential for me before I can function.

It was child's duty to run and get said important beverage... I BEGGED her to hurry, and those was the woids I got.

From the child whom I bore with mine own loins.

Ingrate.

"Spoken like a true smart-ass...."

[miss_american_pie]

19. Oh no

She sounds like a handful.

A few weeks ago my four-year-old asked what was for dinner, then told me "that's not fair" when I said he was getting spaghetti. I told him, baby, fair's a place you take your pig.

So he yells at me from the other room "momma, you go to the fair and take your noodles with you. I'm going to live with grammie."

Kids.

[Oeditpus Rex]

10. 'I told him I want his bike'

I wish you'd been my mommy. :7

:yourock:

[LaraMN]

11. I often feel as though I'm mothering a particular adult male as well.

So I get lots of practice. :eyes:

[Oeditpus Rex]

12. 'Adult male'

conveys merely legal status. It's a contradiction.

:silly:

[Beware the Beast Man]

13. Will you be my mom?

:D

[LaraMN]

15. Can you fit in my uterus?

I'm thinking "no."
:rofl:

[GalleryGod]

18. Thanks for loading me up with THAT image !

[Oeditpus Rex]

26. *cough*

[RandomKoolzip]

14. This is a hilarious thread.

:thumbsup:

[Mayberry Machiavelli]

20. If he turns out to be right, you are gonna be SO sorry. LOL

[tigereye]

21. my 9 year old had the cold and a really bad cough this month

and the doc seemed to think that's actually what it was! Had to take all kinds of meds and such. Missed out on bad colds/coughs for the first 9 years somehow.

Sounds like your little one's quite the wise guy.

[skygazer]

22. I don't think I even knew what whooping cough was when I was 7

:rofl:

When mine were little and they were driving me nuts, I'd give them a big, sunny smile and ask who wanted to play Hansel and Gretel. :P

[dpbrown]

23. The Whooping Cranes are gathering outside...

...they hear the plaintive cough of a compatriot...




"I hear a bike might be coming available soon..."

[Shine]

24. Those crazy kids.

I love that you told him you want his bike. :D

That's classic.

[bigwillq]

25. This made me laugh!

Not that your child is sick but just the whole story! LOL! :hi: