Remembrance of Valentine’s Gifts Past, or What Was I Thinking!

[Montagnard]

Back in my younger days I was the worst valentine gift giver,I like to think I am better today. What I thought of as romantic (my fantasy) was either trashy, mundane or totally unromantic. The thought of valentine gift shopping could cause me a moment of hyper-ventilation. Panic usually built at that moment when I had ventured into the shop where I thought my purchase was stocked. At that moment I saw with unusual clarity that I did not know the correct terminology regarding size and style. I also knew that if my SO opened another gloriously wrapped box containing a flannel granny gown that I would rue the day of my birth.

While my whole being would be crying out for flight I would be accosted by a kindly middle-aged woman patiently inquiring if she might be of help. Invisibility was my desire at that moment. Yet, sometimes I would gather the courage to stammer out what I was seeking, desperately search her face for any small indication of her disapproval. In my mind I knew if I fully described the gift I was seeking; she would immediately know me for the type of boy that she had warned her daughters against. Just a twitch of the eyebrow and I would stammer,

“ah, those flannel gowns on the rack by the door…..that would be nice.”


The question to be answered, was there a time you not happy with a valentine gift?