BUSH TEAMS UP WITH APPLE TO OFFER SPEECHES ON iTUNES

[The Sushi Bandit]

Report: White House considering selling recorded phone calls from domestic spying program

Hollywood – President Bush held a news conference today to announce that his press conferences and speeches, including State of the Union addresses, will be available for sale on Apple’s iTunes music store. For $1.99 each, consumers can download complete ad-free Presidential speeches. The White House decided to make the deal with Apple after the President’s controversial domestic spying program intercepted chatter that Al-Qaeda leader Osama Bin Laden was in negotiations with Apple to offer “The Best of Bin Laden” on iTunes starting in April.

“The fact is that people around the world have access to iTunes,” said White House spokesperson Scott McLellan. “Terrorists like Osama Bin Laden should not have iTunes all to themselves to spew their anti-American views. The President believes his voice should also be heard on iTunes. Muslims who are jogging or working out can now listen to the President’s voice as well.”

President Bush also introduced the new Presidential iPod which carries the presidential seal on the digital player and carries the President’s signature. “I’d also like to introduce the 1GB Presidential iPod nano which holds up to 150,000 of my favorite songs, 90,000 speeches by me or Dick Cheney, or 700 pictures of the Commander-in-Chief in action,” Bush added. “The Presidnetial iPod Nano is thinner than a No. 2 pencil and sells for $149. That’s the kind of deal my fellow Americans deserve.”

http://datelinehollywood.com/archives/2006/02/13/bush-teams-up-with-apple-to-offer-speeches-on-itunes/

[Deja Q]

1. If that's for real, how must Al Gore feel?

I'm assuming he's still on their board?

[The Sushi Bandit]

2. Good question!

[ghostsofgiants]

3. Psst...

(It's satire.)

Here's another article from the site: http://datelinehollywood.com/archives/2006/02/20/international-committee-makes-american-idol-an-olympic-sport/

[The Sushi Bandit]

4. Cant fool you!

[ghostsofgiants]

6. I'm a sharp one!

:P

[LSK]

5. i wonder if they will redo the speechs beforehand

You know, they gotta make the facts based on decisions...

[Dukkha]

7. That's it I'm throwing out my iPod

unless they have counterpoints from Gore to download.

I think my iPod had a Lie filter on it so his speeches would be totally silent.

[evlbstrd]

8. Are they in the Comedy or Tragedy section?

edit for spelling

[gollygee]

9. As if I would sully my ipod

with his voice . . .

[spindrifter]

10. This is the answer

to the speculation about what that oblong-shaped bulge in the Prezidnit's suits is: it's his iPod loaded with the speeches he is going to give and directions for which way to turn doorknobs when he is on tour.
Frankly, he doesn't listen to any songs except Margaritaville, These Boots Are Made for Walkin' and Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star.