Post a Personals Ad that would horrify, terrify and stupefy most people!

[everythingsxen]

I will post something myself, when I come up with something good. :shrug:

[AlienGirl]

1. Insecure, underemployed, infected, and has Issues

Thirty-three year old with chronic Flesh-Eating Bacteria seeks someone special. I am depressive with General Anxiety Disorder, have massive debt and little income, average-to-below-average looking, already have kids and won't have any more, keep house like a pig, and come with large wild animal that bites, screeches, and destroys everything. Seeking that special Cthulhuoid creature/hentai tentacle demon scary enough to frighten me. You be: dressed in lots of black.

Tucker

[everythingsxen]

2. LOL!

You are silly. :P (really need a cthulhu emote :P )

[AlienGirl]

3. You're pretty scary...

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

4. From Craigslist...

Level 72 Paladin Seeking 42+ Rogue, Druid, and Sorceress - m4ww

Date: 2006-06-20, 4:36AM PDT


I am seeking a level 42 or above rogue, druid, and sorceress to help me assault the fortress of Mordria, and for hot kinky sex. I am the sole holder of the Axe of Fragyholt and am a level 72 Paladin equipped with Def+ 52 plate mail. I also have a really big penis. I can cast Magic Missile, Icebolt, and am a fairly skilled at cunnilingus. Indeed, Orcs and Goblins are no match for me, not unlike your unsuspecting genitalia, which shall recieve a thrashing, the likes of which have been only whispered in hushed voice in times of darkness. I have a lot of experience, both with annihilating ogres, and the finer points of pleasuring fair maidens, and like to be beaten with wet towels. I live at home with Mother, and you will have to sneak in through the basement window. This partnership boasts many advantages, such as an unlimited supply of Cheetos and Mountain Dew, and hot, steamy, hanky-panky with my massive member. Comic book lovers a plus.

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/slo/173415785.html

[RevolutionaryActs]

omg

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:


*dies*

[everythingsxen]

6. OMG!!!!111

Best. Ad. Evar!111

[begin_within]

5. "Must love this album, because I play it 3 times per day:"

[struggle4progress]

7. Unemployed male seeks females for meaningful relationship Tuesdays or

Wednesdays. Photo ID required; fake OK if hi quality. Prefer arrest record not longer than mine. Must be willing to leave town quickly on short notice. Psychiatric condition only if treatable by streetcorner pharmacist. Willingness to housesit pet tiger a plus.