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I think I may have depression for the first time...

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ChoralScholar Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-30-06 07:35 PM
Original message
I think I may have depression for the first time...
or maybe it's just stress. I have a handful of conflicts that are weighing me down.

Conflict #1) I like where I live, and have a great job. However, I don't know anyone here. All my friends from college (now my colleagues) live over an hour away. Whenever I DO get together with them, it's very obvious that I'm left out because I live so far away. I'm so tired of being isolated over here. I am working to be more content with where I live, but am not being very successful.

Conflict #2) I dropped my last graduate class because the grading was off the charts, and would destroy my GPA. Over the last 3 weeks, I have enjoyed NOT having a class so much that I don't want to continue in the Master's program. I'm trying to convince myself to finish up my degree even though I don't really want to.

Conflict #3) I'm not spending enough time with my son, and I'm not spending enough time at my job. I'm working for a better balance, but there's only so much of me to go around.

I'm just so tired of the conflict, all I want to do is lay down and go to sleep.

I could go on forever, but I'm sure you're not interested. If anyone wants to weigh in, feel free. If not, thanks anyway.
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Guava Jelly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-30-06 07:37 PM
Response to Original message
1. If one thing i've learned about duers..they listen and care!
I hope your woes pass quickly!
try not to dwell on them..dwelling only makes you miserable and has no effect on the outcome..
I wish you the best :hug:
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ChoralScholar Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-30-06 07:40 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. Thanks.
Earlier today, I was feeling good, and feeling like I had worked through most of it, then something stupid comes along (a financial issue) and here I go, sliding back to the bottom of the hole.



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hyde Donating Member (90 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-30-06 07:53 PM
Response to Reply #2
3. sorry to hear about your woes
My best friend and I are kinda dealing with some of the same issues as you, and it's gotten us both down. We both just graduated from college back in May and the transition into the RL was been a bit of a challenge. Finding a good first post college job and getting our finances on track has been stressful for us both. Plus, he moved away on graduation night and we've both being feeling lonely without each other, so I kinda know what you are feeling.

I've always met all my friends thru school, so I have no idea what to tell you so far as how to make new friends. If you figure that one out let me know.

I do know that I like to fall back on my hobbies on tougher days. Whatever you like to do most, when you are feeling down try doing that. I'm not gonna reveal what I like to do, because I'm a big dork, but it always lifts and lightens my mood. It's very tempting to go to bed and sleep the day away when you're down, but finding something that helps you to feel better is much better than wasting the day away in bed, because that'll only make you feel worse.

Plus, there's the old "look on the bright side" trick. Which I've never quite mastered, but I find that saying "things could be worse," even if I'm not quite sure how, helps. lol.
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Redstone Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-30-06 07:56 PM
Response to Original message
4. Go see a shrink!!!
Those people devote their careers to helping people deal with problems.

Redstone
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skygazer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-30-06 07:58 PM
Response to Original message
5. Stress is very difficult and often leads to Depression
Depression with a capital "D", that is. I'm rather an expert in the field, unfortunately.

For me, the times when problems crop up are precisely the times you're talking about - when you have multiple stressors weighing on you with no clear resolution to any of them. Though it may or may not be full Depression, I would recommend just discussing it with your doctor if you can - often if you can just nip stuff in the bud before it becomes overwhelming, you can save yourself even more grief. For instance, I've been able to avert full-blown incidents with some therapy and the help of a mild tranquilizer to help me over the hump.

And you can always vent here. Or even in the Mental Health forum - we're a pretty tolerant and understanding bunch. :hug:

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wildhorses Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-30-06 07:58 PM
Response to Original message
6. is this a passing faze/phase?
how is your sleepin and eating patterns? Have they changed? Have you gained or lost a significant amount of weight? Do you think you can solve these problems or are you apathetic?
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ChoralScholar Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-30-06 08:00 PM
Response to Reply #6
8. I can work them out, I think.
My eating habits have not changed, although I am needing more sleep as of late.
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wildhorses Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-30-06 08:21 PM
Response to Reply #8
9. probably just a good ole fashioned case o' the blues, then--
take care of your self, be kind to yourself and feel free to vent here. I am by no means offering medical adivce and if this feeling persists or you find yourself feeling hopeless by all means talk to your DR, which you may wnat to do anyway--

oh and by the way hugs are free and excellent therapy:hug:
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ChoralScholar Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-30-06 08:24 PM
Response to Reply #9
10. Thanks so much.
I appreciate all your kind words.
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SlavesandBulldozers Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-30-06 08:00 PM
Response to Original message
7. as one experienced in the art of depression
Edited on Mon Oct-30-06 08:02 PM by SlavesandBulldozers
take my advice with a grain of salt.

you must force yourself sometimes to get out into the world and meet people and have fun. go out and have a good time, surely there are places where people your age gather, go there - buy somebody a drink. talk to the bartender for 5 minutes, go watch a live show. go to a jazz club or a place that plays music you like. that's what I did after my life-altering break-up. i made myself go out and immerse myself in the world - it was an awakening.

also, finish that last goddamn class, you've come this far now just do it. sometimes it's easy to let that ONE LAST THING stall out, its almost a subconcious reaction to the unsureness of the future. just finish it. and seriously. . . GPA? Just finish the damn thing already!

And another thing. Frequent someplace. Anyplace. Make a habit of going to one place religiously once per week at least. You can easily begin to form a network that way. . .you'll notice patterns and get into somebody else's orbit.
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grasswire Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-30-06 09:39 PM
Response to Original message
11. two suggestions
This week is the perfect opportunity to meet a few people in your neighborhood. Call your local Democratic campaign and volunteer to phone bank or whatever else they need. Make a blitz of it -- as much time as you can spare. That will get your mind off your current woes and lift your spirits, I think. And maybe you'll find a group of friends right close by.

Second. Music therapy. It really is amazing what music can do for a person. Amazing.
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