My life - a rant

[BluePatriot]

I sort of miss blogging about my job. It was very therapeutic. However, as I noticed the same toxic comments over and over again I decided to delete the thing, in favor of attempting to cultivate a more positive outlook going forward.

Right.

Ten years ago everyone told me when I was being teased by the popular crowd at school not to worry, as one day I would be their boss!

I worked hard and got my BA a semester early. 3.8, cum laude. English -- I wanted to teach. I naively thought everyone enjoyed learning, like me, and it would be fun to show a new generation all the neat language and literature I enjoyed.

I subbed for a while after college to figure out what age group I liked best. I quickly figured out I would need to be more of a battle ax to be in the classroom. The discipline and government standards wore on me quickly. I took a job at the company my mother works at for a few extra bucks while I figured out what to do.

Then, I casually mentioned apartment hunting, and Bam! I was pushed out of the house. The freedom wasn't so bad even though I knew it would limit my job hunt.

Then, a few months later, my boyfriend proposed, and we were married in a small ceremony last April.

Then, hubby decided he would go back to school on the weekends. He has an Associate's with a 2.2. Failed four classes, played video games most of the time, and makes 20 cents an hour more than I do, to courier documents to the airport.

Ten years later, the ditz with a year of community college that's two years older than I am and on her second kid is my boss and telling me to get files and run copies for her. She's excitedly yammering on about her $2700 refund while hubby and I pare out our $900. I think back to the people who told me I had all this potential to be something great and want to kick them in the teeth.

Lounge, frankly, this sucks. I can't figure out why my education isn't worth anything to anyone. I have two years general office experience now and desperately want a more challenging job. I can't figure out how to build on any skills at this place and have a professional network close to zero because no one networks with the copier chick. I could go back to grad school but I feel people perceive me as overeducated already. My attitude isn't so hot because I am bored out of my mind. There are people all around me with piles of work on their desks that I would excitedly jump in to doing but no one is willing to delegate it to me even if I ask. I'm at my wit's end and could use a hug, or some advice, or something. Thanks!

[Hugin]

1. I have not advice for you...

Only a :hug: :D

What you describe is pretty common here in Lounge land.

Anyway, Onward and Upward!

[BluePatriot]

2. Thanks for the hug

The thing I did that was really fun for a while was NaNoWriMo. I wrote about an office clerk going mad from her boring job. Write what you know, eh? I was sick this last year so I couldn't participate. I guess I could get another book going or something.

[Hugin]

3. Yeah, work to please yourself...

It might turn out to be the most interesting thing you do.

Sorry to hear you were sick. Maybe your feelings about your situation had
something to do with it... I've heard that happens.

[Wapsie B]

4. I would try to find the exact skills that you like doing everyday.

Try to think of what you could do day after day and it wouldn't feel like work. Forget about job titles. Focus on skills and what you love to do. No one will know exactly what those skills are except you. I kept thinking that the hand of God would come down and tap me on the shoulder, pointing the way for me. If I ever did get any guidance from anyone regarding vocation it was so subtle I didn't see it. I do a lot of things ok. If I bust my ass I can do something better than ok. But I don't have any one innate skill that draws praise and adulation from peers or bosses or teachers. I have no great athletic ability. I wasn't gifted in math, science, music or any other area. I went to music school in college with people who had been recognized for their gift of musical ability. I enjoyed the atmosphere but still felt out of place, and no one was gonna tell me where I needed to be. I'm trying to find a place in life where I feel truly whole and I'm still not sure where that is. I just know it's not where I'm at right now.

[BluePatriot]

6. The thing is, my skills are not gender appropriate

and down here in Texas they would just as soon make you the clerk-girl than anything else. I was actually up for IT assistant here due to my talent at fixing computer bugs and communicating with end-users on how to fix their problems but was passed over for the HR manager's son. And I am a manager's daughter!!! (Now keep in mind that yes, an English degree isn't exactly the best qualification for that role, but, the guy that got it is a stoner who dropped out of art school and was floundering around the office with low marks in all roles, and he HATES computers) That really burned me. Reallllly burned me. But, the admin password is the same 2 years later. :evilgrin:

[Wapsie B]

18. Amazing how some people can fail upwards isn't it?

Hates computers but is in IT management. English is ok. It's not as if there are rigid requirements like nursing or engineering for IT work other than aptitude. I've talked to many people who were OJT'd into jobs like Network Admn in the company because they showed a skill with IT work. Your story really hits home with me because I find myself in a similar circumstance. Education is not rewarded at all in my field, neither is experience really. I lived under the mistaken impression that my field was different when in fact it's still how you schmooze and promote yourself, two glaring deficiencies of mine.

[BluePatriot]

21. Yeah, the schmoozing/promoting...

Wish I was better at that too. I just seem pidgeonholed lately. I was ill for a while with various troubles including mood symptoms so that didn't help matters much. It was a physical illness (not that mental health isn't, but, that seems to be a distinction that matters on the job)and I have a feeling I might be on unofficial light duty and isolation. I'm really better now, c'mon...

You won't believe what I worked on before this -- an Iraqi Reconstruction project. I got shuffled up here with more pay and glaringly obvious busy work when I kept pointing out the "funny" stuff. I'm thisclose to throwing some of the more interesting documents on the Internet.

[Wapsie B]

26. Your last paragraph sounds to me like you've been dead-ended

because of pointing out the "funny stuff." I don't know what I'd do if I came across things like that. I'm sure what you were privy to would make fascinating reading.

[BluePatriot]

34. Remember the "$500 for a hammer" jokes?

I've got to give it to the guy on the ground in Kuwait, though, he rode us hard for documents. Our company trying to seek these documents from our field agent to prove they actually performed the services they were charging...that's where the fun was. I actually did OK, I think. But watching all that money flow got tiring, especially with my views on the war and my meager take home pay.

[conscious evolution]

27. Send your funny stuff to these guys.

http://oversight.house.gov/contact.asp
They like funny stuff cause they are funny guys.Everytime I see them tear repukelicker ass I laugh my butt off.
Seriously,drop dimes.It could be the thing that brings someone a well deserved prison sentence.

[BluePatriot]

29. Hm.

I don't know if the funny stuff I came across meets "bad-faith" criteria though. Our foreign agent is really the crooked one. Christ, they "accidentally" put US gov project cargo on an Iranian flagged vessel once...oops....(all money flow abruptly ceased on that job!) We're sort of the mom-and-pop US partner middleman and this was our co's largest account for a while, so were they really going to do anything? Still, though, if my company wasn't willing to dump these guys after I pointed this stuff out to them...bleh.

[1gobluedem]

5. Have you considered the non-profit world?

Maybe as a grant writer? There are actually some positions -- especially at universities -- that pay quite well to do this interesting work.

I have a BA in history but have been a public radio development director for 15 years and I just love it. It's intellectually stimulating and I feel as though I'm doing something worthwhile. It pays decently and the benefits are great.

These jobs don't usually require master's degrees and they're easy to learn, especially if you have good language skills which it appears you do.

Just a thought.

[BluePatriot]

7. It seems tough to get started anywhere

without connections or experience. I could take a class about it, I guess, and maybe meet some people that way. I've decided to take a class or two next semester as the company will pay for community college courses.

[1gobluedem]

8. A class or see if you can volunteer somplace to learn the ropes

A little bit of experience goes a long way.

[BluePatriot]

9. Cool. There is a grant writing seminar Saturday

at the CC. I wonder if I can still squeeze in. Thanks!

[BluePatriot]

14. Update:

I registered for the seminar! Thanks for the idea.

[1gobluedem]

24. Good luck!

I LOVE working for a non-profit.

[BluePatriot]

39. I found a Craigslist posting looking for volunteer grant help

Don't know if they'll bite, but I told them I have written paid freelance and could send clips, and that I wanted to put my upcoming weekend seminar experience to practical use. I'd love to get experience out of it. Probably, they are choking on their food laughing, but, it was worth taking the risk, I think. I'm going to put together an example anyway after the class so why not do it for a real startup? I hope they are interested. They may still be, as I understand this is something people usually charge a lot for.

[BluePatriot]

40. YAY!

they want me on their committee! How exciting! And, it's not too terribly far from where I live (I was scared it'd be all the way downtown or something, not that I care too much) Man, I'd better be soaking in a lot from this grant class.

[IdaBriggs]

10. No brainer -- go do some "Computer Certification Tests" with Microsoft

in Networking, etc. Women are in short supply in the IT world, and if you've got good people/communication skills, jump aboard!

http://www.microsoft.com/en/us/default.aspx

All you need are the credentials, and you can get them with some self study and a couple of CHALLENGING tests. (You are bored anyway, right?) Also start marketing yourself as the computer geek in the company. Casually reading a book about "Networking" and then excitedly babbling about (fill in the blank techno geek) while waiting for the copies to run. Then, if you can't get a good job in your area, take an entry level position somewhere else.

I've been doing computer stuff for over twenty years, and back when I started, the business world was advancing much faster than the school folks (which, frankly, is still happening). Anyway, my point is when I did finally go back to get my degree, I did a "General Studies" with Minors in Business and English.

I'm considered one of the best Database Developers in Michigan, and have a resume you wouldn't believe! Part of my "special marketing skill" is that I can translate "User Requirements" into "Computer Geek" (which isn't as common amongst some of my male peers as you would think.

I highly recommend getting "an attitude" -- it pays off! Good luck!

P.S. Don't waste your time on entry level community college level courses; pick up one of the text books and read through it yourself. I "tested" out of computers 101 in college and will never forget one of the questions: "A machine that can transmit words and pictures over a telephone line and then print them out on paper is called a: A) Copier; B) Telephone; C) Fax Machine....

[LSK]

11. I agree, technology is the key to careers lately

That or specialization such as accounting or medicine or law. I have been programming for nearly 10 years now and while I have had the same job for 8 years, there are tons of jobs on craigslist for me if I had to move on.

I sometimes wonder how people find jobs without having a specialized field.

Having said all of that, have you considered working on a campaign? With the presidential races starting up, they have got to be looking for staffers nationwide.

[BluePatriot]

13. I would love it

but this is Texas...while I hear we have a "50 state strategy" now I doubt this is the place to get started, lol.

[IdaBriggs]

15. LSK, were you replying to me (Ida) or to the Original Poster about

the staffer jobs? I'm currently in my eighth month of a twin pregnancy and kind of ... um... occupied at the moment! :)

But it does sound like a good opportunity for the original poster! :)

[BluePatriot]

12. Hee, I AM the resident geek

and everyone asks me to fix the problems that stump Stoner Boy on an unofficial basis. I guess I could get some computer certs, but after reading about how hard the market seems for that industry, I just relegated computing to a hobby in my mind. And actually, once fellow geek guys find out I speak their language, I get a lot less gender-crap from them than I am taking on in the business world right now. It's something to think about.

[IdaBriggs]

16. For heaven's sake -- even in Texas there is a market!

Go to www.dice.com and do a search. Entry level positions are always available! Get some certs and start getting an ATTITUDE -- you ARE an expert, right? (Even if you aren't, without being arrogant, put on some self confidence and BE ONE. I can't tell you how many jobs I walked into in the "early days" where I had no idea what to expect, and ended up training the full time people on in twenty minutes or less! There are a lot of people who really don't know much about computers who would undoubtedly already consider you a Goddess -- why not do some "Intro Training Classes" for some spare change in the meantime? It will REALLY build your confidence up: "This is a Mouse. Do NOT feed it Cheese!" Snicker!)

[BluePatriot]

22. I should throw in a computer class.

Yeah, confidence matters. I've tried to be a bit more outgoing on the job the past few weeks. It's still frustrating when you know you're not being included because of people's perceptions.

*just got some TYPING plopped on her desk* ugh, for god's sake...

[EvolveOrConvolve]

28. I second that!

As the owner of a tech company, it's refreshing when I get a female applicant. Some of the best IT personnel I've ever worked with were women.

I also agree about the classes - don't do the entry-level stuff. If anything, I would suggest taking more advanced classes, even if you don't want credit for them. The knowledge is FAR more important than the degree. Nearly everyone I hire has zero college experience. Many college graduates are simply unfit to work in a business environment (too much academia and not enough "real" experience) and need to completely learn their trade from scratch.

[Beer Snob-50]

17. I don't know if it ahs been mentioned but

can you use your english degree to do something totally unrelated to teaching (making sense? I don't think I am!)

One of my co-workers was an english major and now she designs our ads and does our web page. It takes creativity, some computer knowledge , and it seems like it is fun.

[AllegroRondo]

20. We have an English major that writes user manuals

and things of that nature.

[oberliner]

19. Two words that will change your life forever

Law school.

[northzax]

23. better words to change your life forever:

Porn Movie.

at least you don't pay someone 100 grand to whore yourself out.

[BluePatriot]

31. Hee.

Good one!

[oberliner]

32. With those credenitals could easily get a full scholarship

And there are many satisfying things one can do with such a degree.

Only trying to help.

[BluePatriot]

36. *dusts off LSAT book in desk*

I had considered law school for a while. Thanks for the advice.

[northzax]

37. fair warning, and seriously

if you are not 100% sure you want to be a lawyer, do not go to law school. seriously. I have many friends who went to law school (and we're talking the best schools in the country, Harvard, Yale, Stanford, Duke and others) who are miserable. I would say that I have in my peer group 20 lawyers (by that I mean people I can pick up the phone and call to go get a beer, or crash on their couch if I am visiting, I am 32) of those, I think maybe 4 actually like being the lawyers they are, the others are simply stuck running out the clock paying off student loans and clocking time until they can do other things. trust me, make sure you love it. get a job in a law firm doing something, and try it out. it's a lot of work to be unhappy.

just my $.02

[BluePatriot]

43. I enjoyed helping with the legal-ese on our contract

and international trade regulations. I also kept the power of attorney records. If I went the paralegal route, I am concerned that I'd get stuck assisting someone who pretty much treats me like I'm treated now. If I went the lawyer route, I'd never see my friends or family again due to working all the time, but it's not really work I hated, so, hm. I guess I just want to be in charge of something again and be seen as bright and capable. On our project, I was a go-to person for research and tough questions that even the manager couldn't answer. I don't feel like a go-to person anymore, unless my ditz-boss wants me to do a menial task while she surfs MySpace.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

41. Too many lawyers out there

I have a law degree I got in 1985 but I never passed the bar. I was a court stenographer for almost 20 years and then burned out. Tried to get a job as a paralegal or legal assistant or whatever.

You would think they'd like someone who has watched and taken down thousands of hearings, trials, whatever, and who was a legal secretary, great skills, 110 wpm typing, etc.??

Nope. Looked for over a year, using my law school's job hunting services and asking all my lawyer acquaintances (some of whom are now filthy rich, 20 years down the line) and I got ONE interview in a year.

I've decided to flush the rat race since they don't appreciate my resume. I'm gonna retire early and move to someplace cheaper to live.

[BluePatriot]

44. *nods*

I figured as much about paralegals, which is really too bad. You could always try being an exec. secretary / personal assistant. My aunt is one to an oil billionare's family and business. Her salary would make lawyers weep. It's too bad about the perception of "secretaries" though, I don't know if I could bring myself to do it.

[Haole Girl]

25. OK. I finally had some time today to read your post.

I'm going to answer it before I read any of the other responses, so I apologize if some of this is repetitive.

First of all, life is too short to be in a boring job. I should know, I've had 23 different jobs since I was 15 years old. No, that is not a typo! To be fair, some of the jobs only lasted a day or two...I knew right away sometimes.

It is one of the most overused cliche's there is, but I'm going to say it anyway: Follow your heart!

Even though my job doesn't pay well, it's what I like to do...and I do it well (yeah, I know, you think I'm conceited...but I really do). My younger sister became very angry with me for taking a 50% pay cut to work for the airlines. If I'd stayed with the pension plan firm I was working at, I'd probably be making a 6 figure salary by now. But, you know what? I wouldn't trade the ability to travel whenever and basically wherever I want, and the experiences I've had with the airlines I've worked for, for almost anythng!

You seem very intelligent...like my younger sister. When my younger sister decided to change careers, she taught herself a new one. Yep, she just went on-line and taught herself programming! It was the most incredible thing I've ever seen. She told me I need to do the same...and, in time, necessity will probably force me to.

Well, this was rambling...and probably an English major's nightmare to read! In short, just do what you need to do. Live life! Be happy! Go for it! Never give up your dreams!

Whew...was that preachy? Sorry if it sounded that way...and good luck!

[BluePatriot]

30. Hey, thanks

It's not preachy. I want advice, right? :)

I should get back to work before they flog me for being on DU too much!

[JVS]

33. Didn't you learn the Liberal Arts Motto?

Education is its own reward.

That is the disclaimer that exists in academic society to avoid responsibility for the future of the best students. If you want money, go into the Jungle like Willy Loman's brother.

On a more practical note. If you are going to be bothered by not making as much as dullards from HS, make sure to move FAR away from where you started out.

[BluePatriot]

35. Aw, I thought you were going to say

"Do you want fries with that?" :)

I do appreciate my education. And, I find value in other aspects of my life. Envy of money isn't really why I'd like to move on...I'd just like to be using my brain daily and maybe make the same pay for it. We spend so much time in our jobs, and making copies and data entry gets old.

For now, I keep my brain happy on DU :)

edit: the money examples in my rant are really along the lines of "hm. I sense I am undervalued here. What to do?" vs. all out envy.

[alarimer]

38. I am kind of in a similar position

I have a degree but am working in a position that only calls for a GED (well those are the minimum qualifications which they rarely hire at) and I can't get promoted to save my life. It's kind of a Catch-22: I do not have management (i.e. people management) experience but I am not in a management position and being the lowest on the totem pole here (with nearly 10 years experience!) you see how that goes.

And I am in year 6 of a Masters program wondering how in hell am I ever going to finish but desperately needing to.

Is there a bash your head against the wall smilie for this?

I found it.

:banghead:

[BluePatriot]

42. I wouldn't mind going somewhere else

but...how do you hear about those jobs? Contacts you make while working, because most jobs aren't advertised. And I have sooo many contacts making copies. Can I join you in a :banghead: What's frustrating about my recent lateral move is the stupefying culture up here. No chance to get involved on an informal basis, chat up customers, see what's going on with the people around me, etc. I just need to know my place and make copies and dot all the i's and t's and if I'm so smart I will be finding anther job anyway and don't need mentors or support, so why bother. God, I hate this environment. It makes me see how turnover is a good thing. There are multiple, MULTIPLE women here who have been filling in the same forms for 10+ years with no promotions and I keep getting hints from them that I should just get used to my lot and it's very depressing.

I am taking a seminar this weekend on grant writing and found a volunteer opportunity, though. I am trying to not get too excited as I don't want to get burned, but I am itching to get started.