Does anyone ever feel like an imposter?

[alarimer]

Or a fraud? I swear I do from time to time. Like I am not really the person I think I am or everyone else thinks I am.
They think I am capable of finishing my Masters when I am in serious doubt as to whether I am actually capable of doing such a thing. It has been almost 6 years since I started. Fortunately I am not a fulltime student so I can use my job as an excuse.

Every time I send in my thesis proposal, I get it back filled with corrections. We are using "Track Change" in Word so it is full of red and blue marks. And they always have questions or comments that I am not sure how to address or even if I should. Today I had a bit of a meltdown (at work no less!- fortunately my boss and the rest are sympathetic) when I saw it. Now I have looked at it again and it isn't so bad.

I berate myself for not having buckled down over the last couple of years when I have had no classes to take. I cringe when I think of all my days off spent doing something other than my work. I know I shouldn't be so hard on myself. A person has to have a little fun now and then. And chores do occasionally have to get done.

[Left Is Write]

1. Yes! I used to think that all the time in my radio days.

How could they trust a yutz like me to do that job? I was well-qualified and I did a good job, but I couldn't help thinking of myself as some kind of fraud, despite evidence to the contrary.

[Generic Brad]

2. Not any more

I am the real deal now.

[kedrys]

3. Every freaking day.

There's always that little corner of my brain that's convinced that everyone is going to find out I'm a complete bozo in the next 5 minutes. It never happens. Brain is not deterred and keeps whispering. Sometimes I tune it out successfully. On good days, I don't hear it at all.

Keep going, you'll do fine. :pals:

[alarimer]

7. I think it's a little voice in my head

sort of an anti-Stewart Smalley "You're NOT good enough, you are not smart enough and doggone it, people don't like you!" I have to learn not to listen to it.

[XemaSab]

4. Totally

All the time. :(

[Madrone]

5. Yes and no.

I am definitely who I AM - and I don't pretend to be anything different. BUT - I often think some people give me WAY too much credit. They may think I've basically got it together, am a good and kindhearted person, and am very intelligent - while I feel like I'm barely hanging on, am a total bitch, and sometimes have difficulty rubbing two coherent thoughts together.

Sorry you're feeling this way. :hug:

[SPKrazy]

6. Of Course

I spend whole days wondering what the hell people really are paying me for?

Or what the hell I am really doing.


I wonder too much really.

It's a lot simpler to not think, but I'm a thinker.

:shrug:

[gemdem]

8. Nearly every day

I have a B.A. in English and Public Relations from many, many years ago. Most of my career, however, has been spent finessing my way through the wonderful world of Information Technology. When people ask, I say that programming is just like writing in another language like German (my minor). But I really have to scramble at times to keep up. "Feets don't fail me now!" :-)

[alarimer]

9. I realize that doing a MS in science is really just an exercise

or at least it's that way in biology. Nothing truly earth-shattering will come of this. It is for me to learn the ins and outs of the process so it does not have to be perfect. But I am a perfectionist at heart. I also chose a rather arcane method of data analysis and did not truly understand it at first. Now I have a pretty good handle on it. But I still have my moments of panic.

[wildhorses]

10. when my evil twin sister starts talking like that--

i tell her to shut the fuck up:P


you are doing fine...just keep at it:hug:

[murielm99]

11. That's supposed to be a very common

feeling among highly successful people. It is not paranoid or abnormal.

Many famous people feel that way from time to time. Carol Burnett said that once in awhile she felt like someone was going to denounce her or whisk her away for pretending to be someone she was not.

Maybe some people can't believe their luck.

[alarimer]

15. but I am not successful

I consider myself almost a failure. I have a job I don't really like, coworkers I sometimes hate. I make no money and am alone. I have nothing to show for all I have done.

[HEyHEY]

12. All the time.... I look at my co-workers and think

"How the fuck is it I manage to keep a job here?"

[alarimer]

21. I look at my coworkers and think "How did THEY manage to

keep a job here?" Well one in particular. Actually I wonder why someone hasn't shot him yet- he's THAT abrasive.

[Evoman]

13. Dude, I'm doing an Ms in Science (biology) as well.

And I feel like a complete putz. I'm doing the umpteenth revisions now. Most of the time, I feel like a fucking numbnuts. I barely read papers anymore, and I don't feel particularly smart (even though I graduated with 3.9 GPA, I still feel like I just got lucky). Everybody around me thinks I'm really intelligent...and by gods, I don't feel it, lol. I just got an amazing scholarship that most of the other science students would kill to get, but I just feel like most of them are so much more knowledgable and smarter than I am (i.e. they deserve it, not me).

People always look at me and assume that 1) I am smart and 2)that I always know what I'm doing. Even people I've met for the first time assume I'm smart. And I feel like I'm lying to them most of the time.

I'm usually pretty confident, but this week my confidence has been shot (turned down for a job, not getting enough done on thesis, etc). But enough whining...whining doesn't get shit done.

[alarimer]

22. My professors talk to me and I just nod and smile

as if I knew what they were talking about.

[Oeditpus Rex]

14. If you mean professionally, no

Quite the opposite, in fact. I look at how badly so many newspapers are written and edited now and I think, "And they fired me?!?"

But then I remember — that wasn't about skill, it was about corporate economics.

[hunter]

16. In social situations I'm always an imposter.

I'm a character in my own story. Few know the writer.

[Strawman]

17. I know exactly how you feel

I am going back for my Ph.D., work full time and even though I'm doing really well and the feedback I've gotten has been very positive, I worry about that literally all the time. Yet, I keep going and if at somepoint someone smarter than me tells me my work stinks, I will live, and I will probably keep doing it anyway.

One time, I did receive a somewhat harsh critique from a prof. of a class presentation my first year. It literally crushed me. We presented our research one week and turned in our completed papers the next week. But I pulled it together, went back, and worked on my paper and I got the only A+ this prof has given in years on a student paper.

I think it's ok to melt down and to have struggles with confidence as long as it doesn't paralyze you. You've kept at it, you haven't given up, and they haven't kicked you our of the program, so you must be doing something right!

[China_cat]

18. I think we all wonder when others are going to

realize what frauds we are at some point in our lives. Especially when starting something new or trying to carry through on something we've left unfinished.

[redqueen]

19. Yes, of course.

It's normal, I think... but you know better it sounds like.

:hug:

[Control-Z]

20. Every single day

Sometimes I avoid people so they won't get to know me well enough to find me out. Even though I am good at the work I do I always assume everyone has something over me - including the students I teach.