What would happen if we were always honest in the Lounge?

[Oeditpus Rex]

And by "always," I mean more than we are now, which isn't often.

[Ariana Celeste]

1. the ever present ass kissing would be nonexistent of course

and there would probably be 5% of the daily posts

[bridgit]

2. what would happen? not so unlike tossing peanut brittle on a concrete sidewalk...

-SNAP!- too many brittle, entrenched, hard edged egos and that's why people should be more like me :woohoo: :bounce:

[k_jerome]

3. we could all admit that wilt chamberlain was the greatest ever....

just trying to increase my lounge time so that i can mysteriously understand how this place works

[trackfan]

70. I admit it.

He once ate a whole pie at halftime.

[NMMNG]

4. Do you mean "honest" or "rude"

BTW, :hi:

[billyskank]

5. I think there must be a significant intersection on that Venn diagram

:rofl:

[Oeditpus Rex]

48. Honest

It kinda bothers me that some think they're the same.



Glad you made the distinction. :hi:

[NMMNG]

66. I agree

But some people do, unfortunately, which is why I had to ask. :-(

[Guava Jelly]

6. I try to be.

.

[Lyric]

7. Probably the same thing that would happen

if everyone in *any* group of people were suddenly compelled to utter honesty. A lot of embarrassment, disillusion, disappointment, and hurt feelings. I prefer people who have the ability to judge whether telling the truth will make a positive difference, or hurt a lot of people for no gain at all. Call me a moral relativist.

[Guava Jelly]

8. good morning green eyed lady

:)
:hi:

[Lyric]

9. Good morning tequila lips ;)

Are you home yet, or are you still in the bottom of a bottle in Mexico? :hug: :loveya:

[Guava Jelly]

10. I am back in the good ol usa

A few lb's heavier and sick of mexican beer.
It was fun and just long enough.
:hug: :loveya:

[Lyric]

11. I'm glad you had a great time!

You deserve it. Someday I'd like to go there too, when I'm older and need a good adventure. :hug:

For now, I'd just like to go back to the Tampa, FL area. I miss Clearwater Beach soooo much. I haven't been divebombed by a horde of voracious seagulls in over a year now. :rofl:

[patricia92243]

12. Well said! :)

;)

[hfojvt]

35. I dunno

I think I prefer honesty, but what is utterly honest? Looking at the totality of a person couldn't I find something positive to say that would be equally as honest as anything negative I could say? Of course, you never get the totality of a person in any interaction - first, alot of surface impressions - eyes, hair, smile, clothes, pulchritude (or lack thereof), posture, etc. Then reactions to the things they say, or do.

What is really embarrassing is to find out that somebody who pretended to be your friend really is not. That's very hurtful, and you feel like such a rube. For another example, it may be embarrassing, mutually, for a co-worker or friend to tell me that my zipper is down, but you know I am gonna find out at some point, and then wonder who else noticed.

I also noticed once how dishonesty seems to help. My dad met my roommate and said "I was a geology major." My roommate said "Oh, really?" and the conversation went on pleasantly. I knew I had talked about this with my roommate in the past so the 'oh really?' was not honest. I could see at that point, that my own gauche response would have been 'yeah, I know' and that with that the conversation would have ended like a train wreck. My business partner was school it seems in 'icebreaker 101'. When people came into the store, he would make some inane comment about the weather, and people would respond to that.

[terrya]

13. It would be an online version of "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf"

It would be a freaking Edward Albee play.

WHICH, btw, I just bought tickets for. "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf", running next month here in Chicago. Starring Kathleen Turner and Bill Irwin.

This is just a plug for me. Yay, me.

[Fran Kubelik]

34. Oh wow.

Sounds like a great time. The play, I mean. Not your prediction for the lounge. :scared:

[Left Is Write]

14. Anarchy. Complete chaos.

[Name removed]

15. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Name removed]

17. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

16. you would be called an asshole.

[Oeditpus Rex]

49. That'd be a first

:crazy:

[Ariana Celeste]

55. Isn't that nice.

[zanne]

18. No more "cliques" and "cool kids" nt

[GirlinContempt]

67. I'm still unclear how so many people

managed to pick so few cool kids, and I don't even know who they are.

And no one has ever cleared it up for me how thousands of people are supposed to interact without finding a group they identify with more than others.

I really, really don't get it.

[datasuspect]

19. i know what would what happen if more than a few people truly spoke what they were thinking

"deleted message"

[Midlodemocrat]

20. Not sure what you mean. Are you referring to being honest

when someone asks for assistance or advice? I think most people are honest when that happens.

If you mean being honest in the "when you think of ________ threads", some of those looked pretty mean spirited to me. It doesn't cost anyone anything not to say something really mean, IMHO.

[Bunny]

21. You're absolutely right. It costs nothing to simply stay out of those

kinds of threads. No one forces anyone to post rude, ignorant comments and more people should just avoid doing it.

Having said that, I will add that when posters who have a long, extensive history of making rude, ignorant comments to others decide to open up the floor for comments, they should have no expectation that people won't speak honestly in return. I think it's called getting back what you put in, or something like that.

[Midlodemocrat]

24. I guess I'm oblivious, or just don't pay enough attention.

It seems to me that the rudest posters get the granite cookie pretty quickly. I thought deleted messages in the lounge were mostly sexual remarks, but having read some of those threads this morning, there is obviously a lot I don't know.

I don't think I want to know, frankly. I have enough drama in my own, living, breathing flesh life to take on some in the online world.

[hippywife]

22. After lurking in some of those threads

I fully understand why the teachers in school when I was a kid would stop the circulation of slam books.

[Midlodemocrat]

25. What is a slam book?

[hippywife]

28. Basically the same thing as

those threads. Someone would make a little paper book with several pages in them. On the first page you woulds write your name next to a number and then put your answers by the corresponding number on the following pages, each asking "What do you think of (insert name here)?"

[ScreamingMeemie]

46. Check out/purchase Judy Blume's "Otherwise known as Sheila the

Great" for the best literary description of a slam book and its aftermath ever written. Thanks to Judy Blume, my fourth grade "friends" and I decided to do one. Stupid us.

Basically, every day here in the Lounge is a slam book of some sort or another. :hi:

[graywarrior]

33. Finally, someone else who has experienced the horror of the slam book.

[hippywife]

40. Hiya, GW!

Yep...and in Catholic School to boot! LOL

[graywarrior]

52. 8th grade. As if we didn't already feel like pieces of shit shat out by the nuns.

Fucking slams pads come along and everybody in class had to make one and pass them out. God, I hated that. HATED it.

[Gormy Cuss]

23. The Seventh Seal would be opened. The trumpet judgements would follow, and then the seven bowls.

In other words, it would be all over.

No one is ever honest all of the time. We all censor our opinions to some degree either from fear of rejection or from a sense of civility. We each have different filters in that regard.

[asthmaticeog]

26. Appreciation threads would be far livelier. nt

[av8rdave]

27. As far as I know, I always have been - maybe that's why I'm such an effective thread killer!

[Left Is Write]

29. But you won't be killing this thread! I'm posting after you! Ha!

:P

[Hugin]

30. Maybe...

Maybe, not!

[av8rdave]

31. you're ruining my record! :(

[Dangerously Amused]

32. Nice try.

But I'm part of the all new "Anti av8rdave Thread Killing Clique," too.


Oh shit. We're supposed to be a secret organization.



Sorry, guys.


:blush:

[av8rdave]

64. I just KNEW everyone was out to get me!

It isn't paranoia if they really are, is it?

[auntAgonist]

36. I'm always honest .. makes my posts boring

but I only stay with 'safe' topics. No personal attacks ever. Just call me wuss I guess.


:hi:
aA
wuss

[LostInAnomie]

37. EVERY thread would turn into a RAUNCHY sex thread

The mods would quit out of frustration.

[MonkeyFunk]

38. It would be a hysterically funny

4 hours. Then the lounge would be permanently shut down.

[ScreamingMeemie]

39. I am always honest.

I was honest in your vicodin thread the other day, and you never responded.

[Oeditpus Rex]

50. I didn't think you were addressing me

You were talking about people who take Vicodin recreationally. :shrug:

[ScreamingMeemie]

53. I am not a big fan of people posting about their usage of vicodin,

as so often happens in the Lounge. I took the thread, and others, as such. Vicodin is a lifesaver for me and when people use it for less than its intended use or treat it as if it's "fun" it makes it that much harder on those who use it responsibly. Would that I would never have to take it again, but that isn't so.

[Oeditpus Rex]

57. I regret that it bothered you

I have chronic low-back and shoulder pain, for which I sometimes take Vicodin at night because I wouldn't be able to sleep without it.

It never occurred to me that talking about the pleasant side effects could be offensive, but now that you bring it up, I can see where it could be interpreted as a medical marijuana user saying "Woohoo, I'm stoned!" and thereby perpetuating a stereotype.

I shall defer to your viewpoint in future. :hi:

[Deja Q]

41. I think it's better to lie. That way nobody gets hurt or picked on.

I also just said the truth; I may be an emotional cripple, but I can't even lie on the ground... :7


Edited: Typo

[Dangerously Amused]

42. Well, there's "literal honesty" and then there's "principled honesty."

Big, BIG difference.


Plenty of the former around here, not enough of the latter. Unfortunately.

[Oeditpus Rex]

56. An important distinction

I should've been more clear in the OP. I meant, for example, the solicited* "I disagree" or "I think you're making too much of this," as opposed to the unsolicited "Christ, your kids are ugly."
It's pretty obvious what the result would be if everyone did the latter.



*By "solicited," I mean not only question-answer, but the implied solicitation of a proffered opinion, estimation, etc.

[Dangerously Amused]

68. To me the bigger distinction is that

...literal honesty can include half-truths - which can be more misleading than outright lies - whereas principled honesty would not.

[dolo amber]

43. Isn't that more or less what the recent "ignore poster - block

poster from replying to threads" etc. experiment was about? And you see how popular that was...

I don't think most people are interested in being honest on the internet. :shrug:

[SPKrazy]

44. We Would Demand To Have

the nuclear block ignore option :shrug:

[Seabiscuit]

51. There'd be a lot of deleted messages and blocked threads.

Instead of putting a few dozen flaming A-holes on ignore, I'd be posting about how I'd "honestly" love to put their eyes out with a hot poker.

[swag]

45. Deleted message

[Shine]

47. There'd be a lot more locked threads.

:D

[Pierre.Suave]

54. I know what would happen

Everyone would call me an asshole for being honest.

hell, thats been done a few times already...

[idgiehkt]

58. do you mean honest

in the sense of not posting blatant lies about other DUers, or in the sense of always posting what we are thinking about them at the moment...

My brain is already starting to hurt.

[Oeditpus Rex]

62. See #56 (n/t)

[idgiehkt]

63. If we were always

honest about ourselves, and honest about others...I think there would be a lot less conflict in here, and it would lessen some of the jockeying for position and attempts to 'control the perception and group impression' of people we can't even see...it's a weird vibe that feels even weirder than usual to me lately. I don't know whether that kind of honesty would be called principled or literal. I hate to see people get upset about those polls they posted because I always believe it is trolls that mostly vote negatively in those things. Maybe that is hopelessly optimistic, but that is my instinct.

[Hardrada]

59. How would anyone really know if we were really honest?

Do we have ESP?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

60. well generally if you say something unpopular you are probably telling the truth

especially something that makes you look bad

[Ariana Celeste]

61. that's usually right

see that a lot around here, lounge & gd alike

[Hardrada]

65. Well.....okaaaaayie?

Still I think we have a problem with this since some people might be deliberate provocateurs. And some are just mischievous. And some might be under the influence of something or other and not quite responsible for their posts.

[wildhorses]

69. are you trying to call me a liar??

just askin'

[Oeditpus Rex]

71. Excuse me?

Did someone ASK for your silly opinion? :eyes:




:hi:

[wildhorses]

72. well, no...but do they ever?

:hi:

[Oeditpus Rex]

73. Well...

Heidi asked you which chair she should get. :shrug: