What do you do when you feel like Giving Up?

[Mike03]

I'm going through a very tough period right now, where people close to me are very ill with serious diseases, and I also had to put down my precious dog three weeks ago. Because all of this happened at once, at first I thought I was coping with it well, but after a couple of weeks I have realized I'm not coping with it at all, but becoming increasingly depressed, withdrawn, and almost apathetic about everything.

At times I want to get another dog, so I have some reason to even get up in the morning. I need something to care for and nurture.

At other times, I simply don't know. Maybe at any moment I'll have to rush my friend to the hospital because of his illness, and maybe it's not the time for me to get a new dog.

But I am really groundless without my dog, as silly as this sounds.

It is just a feeling of being very lost and without any balance or center, and turning towards self destructive patterns and thoughts.

I am very open to advice about how to handle difficult times like this. Any help would be appreciated.

[Haole Girl]

1. There are lots of dogs who need a home...

...so if you want a dog, why not go to a shelter near you and get one?

I hope you feel better soon. :hug:

[Generic Brad]

2. Do something. Anything.

I tend to get stuck in my depression. So whenever I am dealing with grief or sadness I make a conscious effort to make myself busy and connect with other people.

I am sure a good psychiatrist would say my approach is wrong, but I find that after a few months I work myself into near exhaustion. Then with the benefit of distance and time I find I am better able to cope.

[Mike03]

6. Thanks, that is exactly what I'm trying to do

Re-ignite some friendships and try to be more outgoing, although it is really a challenge sometimes.

My sisters are also helping me, trying to get me to see someone.

I know I have been withdrawing, and that is one reason I'm trying hard to not hibernate but to reach out a bit more, if possible.

[Generic Brad]

7. You lost one of the best friends you've ever had

I'm glad to hear you have some emotional support. But when we're in the middle of it, it never feels like enough. Be good to yourself, please?

[Critters2]

3. I understand.

At the time of my divorce, the period I refer to as "The Great Depression", I only kept going for my pets. Don't know what would've happened if I hadn't had them. Someone suggested getting another dog. That's worth considering. Or just volunteering at a shelter.

This helps me, too: http://emotionsanonymous.org/

[Perseid]

4. my brother died after I took care of him for 11 months

my 12 year old dog died 10 days later.

I can only say that I can't do what I used to do.

I'm ready for something new.

[Swede]

5. Sure,why not get a dog?

The dog will help you in this hard time.

[Cabcere]

8. Mike, I'm really sorry to hear this - I've had that feeling too, and it's no fun.

:hug: Music usually helps me - if you play a musical instrument, or sing, or even if you just want to listen to some good music, that might help. Like Pete Townshend said, "Rock won't eliminate your problems, but it will sort of let you dance all over them." :shrug: I don't know if that will work for you - music is one of my passions and I know it's not the same for everybody - but that's usually what I do.

Whatever course you end up taking, I wish you the best - and I am sending good vibes your way. :hug: Peace.

[CBHagman]

9. Just for yourself.

See if you can't arrange an evening out with someone you enjoy and feel close to. Do something you both like. I used to go to the theater with a friend, though not during crisis stages, just when I was down, and I got A) a friend I still have, B) a lot of great memories, and C) exposure to dramas, comedies, etc.

Wishing you the best...
CBH

:hi:

[Jamastiene]

10. Get a puppy and bond with it.

I know that sounds crazy and too easy and simple and cheesy as hell, but a pet is one of the best healers on the planet. Period.

[johnnie]

11. Honestly?

This may sound silly and I have mentioned it many times on here, but what I do is think of that old proverb about the guy who was bummed he had no shoes until he saw the guy with no feet.

It seriously does get me through some tough times.

I'm not trivializing what you are going through, but I think it is a good first step in getting yourself back up and movin' again.

I also say that getting a new dog to love on would be a great idea.