Question for the lounge...mainly for the guys, but the ladies opinions are welcome,too

[TK421]

Let's say you are sitting at a bar, talking to a friend of yours and minding your own business. You're just sitting there enjoying a couple of beers, when you notice two women across the bar with their cell phones pointed at you, giggling , and taking pictures of you with the cameras. How do you react to this? How should you react to this? ( before anyone can ask, yes...they admitted taking pictures of me, because I asked them )....later on

Do you just sit back and let them have their fun, or does it bother you that a total stranger is taking your picture without your permission?

The reason I ask? Because I just got back from that bar, and this actually happened. I decided to leave, and it's a good thing I did.

Because you people might have seen me on America's Most Wanted tonight...I probably would have gone ballistic on them, but I didn't..although I believe I had every right to do that. I showed control and just...left the bar.

Does this strike anyone else as rude and intrusive? I know how daring and, sometimes, obnoxiously imposing people can be nowadays...they'll do anything without thinking of the possible consequences....I'm just curious, is all.

[SPKrazy]

1. you should have a "right" not to have your picture taken

but who knows anymore

rights are here one day and gone the next

wrong

I recently saw a guy doing this in a public place at a pool, just randomly taking pictures of no doubt women in bikinis

who knows

they could be emailing them to www.nakedTK421.com for all you know :P

[TK421]

3. I went to check out that link, SPK, but I was getting a message saying

server not found? :shrug: What gives?

[SPKrazy]

4. hey it's not my web site

it's YOURS d00d

:rofl:

[TK421]

7. I wasn't aware that site was out there...yet another violation of my privacy

but I suppose that's not a big deal to you people, is it? :toast:

[SPKrazy]

10. ROFL

:rofl:

:toast:

paranoid much :P

[TK421]

13. No, dude...in all seriousness they admitted to taking the pictures

I saw that they were pointing those fucking camera phones at me ( which they came pretty damn close to inhaling ) I asked them " Excuse me, why are you taking my picture"? I heard the clicks, and there was nobody else around me ( where I was sitting, there was nothing except for a beer cooler...maybe they were taking pictures of some sexy six-pack take outs ) :D

[SPKrazy]

16. what did they say?

maybe they were going to print them and make a shrine to you???

:shrug:

I wouldn't like it either dood

[TK421]

22. When I asked them about it, the one girl just said " Oh, sorry"!

that's it..the other one was just drinking her beer and looked down, didn't say a word.

Probably just girls night out...but it still pisses me off that I can't just go out and relax without having my fucking picture taken by some stranger.

Oh, I'm aware of the fact that other people might take different meaning from what they did...

Don't really care...it was fucking rude and ignorant

[redqueen]

49. Just "oh sorry"? No explanation?

I would've gone ballistic-ish.

[TK421]

64. I think I caught her off guard, because I walked around to her side of the bar

while she was talking to her friend...the friend saw me coming, but she didn't

[Beer Snob-50]

48. Personally, I would have just laughed it off

It wouldn't bother me in the least bit

[regnaD kciN]

34. Legally speaking...

...as long as the photographer is in a public place, and taking the picture of a subject viewable from that public place, it's perfectly legal. So, a guy taking photos of women in bikinis at a public pool or beach is well within his rights (the rationale is, that if you're doing something in public, you're fair game...and that would even apply if you and your spouse/partner were having sex in your own home with the window open, as long as you could be clearly seen from the street where the photographer was taking pictures of you!). However, taking photos in a private area like a bar or club is another matter, and the owner can forbid it, or the subjects can convince the owner to do so.

The only exception here is that such photos can only be used (sold or licensed) for editorial purposes -- news articles, educational materials, or as photographic prints. If the work is being used for commercial purposes (trying to sell something or someone), a release from the subject is needed -- to prevent a person from being an inadvertent spokesperson for something they dislike. For example, say if you and your family are picnicking in Central Park. If someone takes your photo and licenses it to a guidebook about NYC, they can do it without your permission. OTOH, if they license it to the Giuliani campaign ("Thanks to Rudy Giuliani's leadership, families don't have to worry about terrorists, like they would with Hillary Clinton in charge." :eyes: ), you have the right to block your images being used to convince people to vote Republican.

[TK421]

40. I understand, it's just so frustrating

as I stated in an above post, people are getting bolder and bolder as time goes by

[Sequoia]

58. Thanks for the photo link!

Using one as a fall landscape wallpaper now. Seems I've seen this site before some time ago.

[Haole Girl]

2. I wouldn't like it either

But, then again, I've been called paranoid on more than one occasion. ;-) :hug:

[TK421]

6. I'm pissed about this...I would never dream of doing something like that

to someone else....


Especially these days

[Haole Girl]

8. When drinking is involved, people can be even more...

.. obnoxious. I say that tonight because I am not drinking. ;-)

[TK421]

11. I'm not quite sure I understood that?

:shrug: could be the beer, although I only had four ( and that's nothing to me )

[Haole Girl]

14. Not you. Them.

:hug:

Now see.. if I had some scotch tonight I could write better! lol!

[TK421]

19. That's OK.....although I had enough tonight ( light night as it was )

a good scotch would be welcome about now :thumbsup:

People are just itching for trouble these days, aren't they? Bold motherfuckers, these camera-phone fucks

[JVS]

5. You should pulled a Sonny Corleone and smashed their phones

They'd have been impressed by your rough masculinity and would have had sex with you.

[TK421]

9. What a shame...I wouldn't have dreamed of having sex with either of them...

the very last thing on my mind here, tonight.

[JVS]

12. Maybe hotter women at another part of the bar would've been impressed by your Corleonesque...

roughness and desired to have sex with you.

[TK421]

15. There weren't any others...so that theory goes right out the window

which...ironically, is where they would have ended up going had they continued to take pictures of me without my permission..


Go figure

[redqueen]

50. ...

:rofl:

[driver8]

47. Ha Ha -- sounds like good advice to me!! n/t

[Oeditpus Rex]

17. It's more than rude and intrusive

It may be against the law, depending on where you live.

Statues governing things like this almost always mention "a reasonable expectation of privacy." Inside almost any building that houses a business, one has that expectation — at least, from having one's photo taken.

Such laws are rarely enforced, though — particularly today, with the ubiquity and relative anonymity of cameras.

[TK421]

21. I'm not sure what laws Pennsylvania has that enforces them..probably none

I never looked into it, but maybe now I just might.

Just in order to avoid something VERY nasty happening to the offender if, in fact this ever happens again.

[Mike03]

18. Honestly,

I wouldn't know whether to be flattered or frightened.

[TK421]

24. I was neither....I found it offensive

I also have a camera phone, but I would never think to just whip the thing out ( in a bar, nonetheless ) and take a picture of a total stranger.....and that just-takes-balls nowadays

A person could actually SHOOT YOU for doing that

JUST HOW FUCKING STUPID are people these days? And no, I wasn't thinking of doing that, but it really was annoying and rude.

[regnaD kciN]

36. I wonder what would have happened...

...if, as soon as you realized what was happening, you grabbed your cell and started taking pictures of them?

:shrug:

[redqueen]

51. That would have been an excellent thing to do.

Turn the tables, see what they think about it.

[TK421]

61. Oh, I'm sure some of the guys sitting at the bar would have gotten riled up

over that...there were some people to the left of me that seemed to know these two

[Colorado Progressive]

20. You have every right not to have your picture taken.

As a portraitest I ALWAYS ask before taking anyone's picture, period.

[TK421]

25. That should have been the case here, but it seems they already have my picture

in their stinking camera phone....without my permission

At this point? There's nothing I can even do about it

[regnaD kciN]

35. Morally yes, legally no...

See my post above.

[libodem]

23. meebee they just thought chew was really

really cute. Are ya? Might make up for ya bein' so surly. (Just funnin' I'd feel intruded upon myself if it happened to me)

[TK421]

26. No...I don't think so, although I 've heard otherwise from certain people

still, there is no excuse for this kind of behavior...

[TK421]

27. A similar experience happened to me about six years ago while I was

working at a Walgreens Pharmacy front checkout desk ( in Florida, I feel the need to mention that )...I needed to add this because it was a bit of a flashback, but it did, indeed happen to me........

I was checking out the neanderthals at the front of the store, when two people came up to the register...one of them holding a VIDEO CAMERA, yeah...you read that right!

The person who was making the purchase ( and I don't recall what was so grand about it ) gave me their money to pay for it, and the person holding the camera was saying shit like " Now, Sandy ( I think that might have been her name ) is handing the cashier her money....now she's getting her change from him"!

"She's putting her purchases down on the counter...he's bagging them right now..."

Now, I don't know if this person who was paying just got out of a VERY long coma, or it was the very first time in their life that they made an actual purchase of ANYTHING ( this woman seemed to be about in her mid to late 40's, mind you ) but the fact that some degenerate was filming ME with a video camera ( without my permission ) really....REALLY bugged the fucking shit out of me. She must have seen the look in my eyes, because she said something to the effect of " I don't really think he's too happy being on camera" NO SHIT, BITCH...so put it down before you find yourself EATING IT!!!!!!!!!!

True story, people! It happened...

[tjwmason]

28. Frightfully rude.

They probably had entirely harmless intentions, and it is also very likely that they were having a few drinks and getting somewhat silly with each other (as we all are when drinking in groups, at times).

I tend to lean towards the "they thought you were good looking" school of thought - but whatever their motivation and intention they should not have considered photographing you without your permission or a particularly good and important reason for doing so without it.

:hi:

[TK421]

41. Agreed...I suppose I hadn't thought about what was being discussed

over where they were sitting. Still, it's really strange having this happen...gives me the creeps

:hi:

[redqueen]

52. Why wouldn't they just say so, then?

When he walked over and ask... if it was cause they thought he was cute... well, that's the perfect opportunity for flirtations.

Perplexing.

[tjwmason]

54. Perplexing indeed.

I can think of few adjective better suited to the description of people - especially when in groups, and especially when in the process of alcohol consumption.

[redqueen]

55. Hehehe... excellent points.

:hi:

[Dangerously Amused]

67. Fragile egos?

:shrug:


My hunch is that it was purely flirtation, and I'm guessing the reason they used a "gimmick" to spark a conversation was because they were too shy/insecure to approach him directly. And if they were already that insecure, then it doesn't surprise me that they would back off from their approach immediately when they saw that he was reacting badly to it (ie, not flirting in return), and why they didn't have an explanation for their behavior. I mean, it would have been terribly awkward at best and at probably humiliating for them to have to say, "I was trying to flirt with you because I think you are cute" to someone who not only wasn't interested, but took the initiative to walk over and angrily rebuff them.

I think that a lot of women today are still intimidated by the thought of making the first move on a guy.

FWIW.


:hi:

[Dangerously Amused]

29. Dude, I can totally see this as

...one of the "Top Ten Super Trendy Hi-Tech Tips for Getting HIM to Notice YOU!" that one of them saw in the Cosmo or whatever she picked up while getting her hair done last week.


"Hey, you sexy techie girl! Catch his attention from across a room by taking his pic with your camera phone! He's sure to notice the flash, then when he looks your way... flash him that dazzling smile! He'll be flattered to know that you already want to take him home - even if it's just in your phone - and approaching you to see his pic is a great way to get a conversation started!"

Seriously. I doubt it was anything more sinister than that. And it would also explain their reactions both before and after you confronted them.

[MissHoneychurch]

30. That is just rude

I would have asked them to delete the picture right then.

[skyblue]

31. Sounds sleazy but not nice.

[WritingIsMyReligion]

32. If these women are younger and you're older, then you have to understand

that we youngin's take pictures of ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING with our cell phone cameras. Ourselves, our friends, teachers when their backs are turned, funny scenarios that pop up, everything. I know several girls with pictures of men on their cell phones, and several boys with pictures of women--these are all people they deem "sexy" or something similar. Unless you're outrageously, obviously hideous, the chances are that these girls think you're SMOKING hot, and want evidence for when they go back to talk to the ladies later ("Look at the hottie we met at the bar tonight!")

It's intended as a compliment, usually; these women want you to be flattered that they think you're hot enough to be stored on their cell phones. But if you're offended/insulted/sketched out, I don't exactly blame you.

[Hosnon]

33. You probably don't have a right not to have your picture taken. You were

in a place (a bar) that has a low reasonable expectation of privacy, especially regarding your appearance.

That said, it was rude and they any photographer should ask before taking your picture.

[Lance_Boyle]

63. It's actually up to the establishment's owner(s).

They have the right to determine their own policy on photography.

[Hosnon]

65. I figured it was something along those lines. In any event, it doesn't appear

to be a right.

[MilesColtrane]

37. Tell them to slag off.

If that doens't work, go Sean Penn on them.

[raccoon]

38. Yes, it strikes me as rude and intrusive. nt

[av8rdave]

39. I wouldn't like it...I would probably just go over and tell them I charge for photos and autographs

[Bucky]

42. I would totally get up and pose for the pictures. Do the Egyptian or the Bodybuilder.

Point a camera at me and you're basically inviting the ham.

[One_Life_To_Give]

43. R U on HollaBack now?

//www.hollabacknyc.blogspot.com/

Maybe you offended them without knowing it and will have your picture and offence posted.
Or perhaps they thought you were really hot and they have to put your portrait over their beds.

[TK421]

56. lol

:D If they have my portrait over their beds, then I think I might have a slightly larger problem on my hands.....

Visualize Glenn Close and a rabbit boiling on a stove-top

[dembotoz]

44. the alternative would be?

having to get something signed every time you take out a camera?
Would cut down on those godawful vacation pictures people want to show you
so maybe not a bad idea.

On the otherhand, I am very self conscious.
It would probably freak me out because i would think they were laughing at me.
some folks would pose, i would probably withdraw

[DS1]

45. I'd pull out my 10D and take some pictures of them

:P

[zonkers]

46. Sounds like they were trying to flirt.

edited.

[redqueen]

53. I don't buy the thought you were hot / flirting angles...

they would have said so at the bar when you confronted them.

What a bizarre situation.

[TK421]

60. I've considered the reasons for this in some of the above posts

I suspect alcohol had a big role to play in it, too

[Sequoia]

57. I would've asked them why they're doing it and to please stop.

Back in the old days you could yank out the film and expose it to light. It would've bothered me.

[TK421]

62. Like I said in one of my other posts above, people are just getting

bolder every day...

[EstimatedProphet]

59. Yeah, it does annoy me. I'd ask them to stop

[carly denise pt deux]

66. Do you resemble a celebrity? Maybe it was mistaken identity

That would be annoying, I would have had to go ask them why they were taking pics. Maybe they know someone who is interested in you and are taking pics to send....but that is soooooo junior high.
Carly

[TK421]

68. Funny you should mention that....

But I'm always getting " a younger Tom Hanks " just about every day, everywhere I go.
I personally don't see it, though

[Javaman]

69. Being bald for 95 percent of my life, people have been interested in

taking my photo for one reason or another. I like to think I'm hansome lol, but people think I have an interesting look. Whatever.

snap away, I could give a damn. the more pics of me out there, the less likely they can pin something on me. LOL

[rakeeb]

71. as rude as even I think it is,

I still catch myself pulling out my phone (if I have it on me) and taking a pic whenever I encounter a mullet.

[TK421]

73. ....

:rofl: You sell the pictures to mullet.com?

[rakeeb]

80. no, selling would just

cheapen the experience of observing a mullet in it's natural habitat.
Seriously though, at work we had been making fun of a hairstyle that should have died with our youthful idealism, yet it kept appearing.
We would take pictures to share at work, along with the stories of the encounters, which all had one recurring strain: if you approach a mullet with a camera in hand and say "You rock!!!", the mullet will insist that you take the picture, regardless of venue. Could be a concert, bar, mall, beach, parking lot, free clinic, etc.

[Javaman]

74. Mullets are a blight on the nation and should be exploited at every turn!!

:rofl:

[TK421]

75. Do you think they would be taking pictures of me if I had a mullet?

:think: no way- I just had a brilliant idea...

[Javaman]

77. oh for the love of everything good, don't do it!!!

your hair will hate you for the rest of your life.

[TK421]

78. Not only that, but my family will disown me, and my friends will all start wearing

t-shirts that say NOT WITH HIM with the arrow pointing away from me

[Javaman]

79. Mullets are like a virus...

they may not infect people into having a mullet, but they cause others around you to commit social, fashion and eating faux pas

Sort of like getting the flu, but giving others around you a cold.

[rakeeb]

82. Point well taken...

not even early Bono lends any credence to the ape drape, neck warmer, 10-90, Tennessee Top Hat, Soccer Rocker, Business up front party in the back, Kentucky waterfall, etc.

[TK421]

76. Sorry, I'm at work right now so it may take me time to reply to some of these

posts. I don't want to be tazed by the internet police here

[semillama]

70. oh, wrong reaction!

You should have told them that the going rate for taking your picture was a beer per photo...

[TK421]

72. I would have asked for shots instead, kill two birds with one stone

get a good buzz going on, and they would end up getting what they wanted





maybe....just kidding

[rucky]

81. don't you ever watch The Pick-Up Artist?

it's no big mystery.

[TK421]

83. I have since posted another thread...it happened again

sorry I cant talk much now, I'm too upset

[applegrove]

84. Strikes me as less intrusive because you were all in a bar. Could have

been an opening line in that game people in bars play. If it was on the street I think it would be very intrusive.