"God doesn’t give us more than we can handle."

[Haole Girl]

I hate this expression.

:rant:

[philosophie_en_rose]

1. "Everything happens for a reason."

:puke:
:puke:
:puke:

[Haole Girl]

3. Equally disgusting. nt

[ThomCat]

18. That one is only true

if you believe the reason is that "shit happens."

[raccoon]

79. I hate that ridiculous platitude, and the one the OP quoted.

I don't believe either of those.

Harold Kushner says in WHEN BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE that he doesn't believe the one in the OP, either. Of course, he says it more eloquently than that. :-)

Both those invalidate the person these things are happening to.

[nytemare]

106. Yep, or "It was meant to happen".

Things happen FROM A CAUSE, not for a reason. Sometimes, the cause just came about from chance. If it can happen, it may not happen often, but, sooner or later it will.

Some things just happen, some things happen based on continued patterns of behavior. Sometimes, there are no answers, sometimes, there are, and they aren't the ones that people want to hear.

[Sanity Claws]

2. I don't like it either

If it were true, then there would never be suicides. But there are. People can be overwhelmed by stuff, particularly if they are alone with no one to turn to.

[Haole Girl]

4. Thank you

I don't see how it could possibly comfort a person in distress. It's simply not true.

[spacelady]

5. To that I say "Wanna Bet?" n/t

[Haole Girl]

7. Exactly

:hug:

[flamingyouth]

6. Yeah, I do too.

[Haole Girl]

8. Hey

What is that in your sig line, if you don't mind me asking? :hi:

[flamingyouth]

26. It's a scene from "Trip to the Moon," one of the first movies.

It's where the avatar is from. When I saw the new avatars the admins picked, I couldn't resist it. :D :hi:

[Haole Girl]

27. Thanks!

:D :hi:

[supernova]

9. Ugh. Irritating in the extreme!

I actually have gotten to the point of saying "Ugh. That's quite enough personal growth by trials and tribulations, thank you very much."

[Haole Girl]

11. I can't even say anything when someone tells me that

I sort of freeze... almost worried about what might come out of my mouth!

[Kutjara]

10. "God is testing us."

For what, employment in the celestial civil service?

Couldn't he just make it multiple choice?

[Haole Girl]

LOL!

That's a great one. I'm bookmarking this! Thanks! :hi:

[mikeytherat]

71. If God is testing us, why doesn't he give us a "written"?

Woody Allen, Love and Death

mikey_the_rat

[Lex]

12. "It's in God's hands now."

So I'm just going to kick back and not do jack?

[Haole Girl]

15. Yeah...

Who comes up with this shit, anyway? :shrug:

[Deep13]

82. Translation: I don't accept any responsibility. n/t

[ThomCat]

13. I'm right there with you.

First of all, I believe in random shit happening.

Second, people often get more than they can handle.

x(

[Haole Girl]

17. True. On both counts.

:hug:

[Lex]

24. Regarding random shit, a lyric from one of my favorite songs is:

Whatever has happened to anyone else
Could happen to you & to me

And the end of my youth was the possible truth
That it all happens randomly

[ThomCat]

28. Those are damned good lyrics.

What band?

[Lex]

38. "Philosophy of Loss" is the song

Welcome to why the church has died
In the heart of the exiled, in the kingdom of fate.
Who owns the land and keeps the commands,
And marries itself to the state.

Modern scribes write, "In Jesus Christ, everyone is free."
And the doors open wide to all straight men and women,
But they are not open to me.

Who is teaching kids to be soldiers?
To be marked by a plain white cross?
And we kill just a little to save a lot more,
The philosophy of loss.

And there are a few who would be true out of love,
And love is hard.
And don't think that our hands haven't shoveled the dirt,
Over their central American graveyards.

Doctors and witch hunters stripped you bare,
Left you nothing for your earthy sins.
Yeah but who made this noise? Just a bunch of boys.
And the one with the most toys wins.

And who is teaching kids to be gamblers?
Life is a coin toss
And of course, what you give up is what you gain.
The philosophy of loss.

Whatever has happened to anyone else
Could happen to you and to me.
The end of my youth was the possible truth
That it all happens randomly.

So who is teaching kids to be leaders?
And the way that it is is meant to be.

The philosophy of loss.


--Indigo Girls, written in 1999

[Arugula Latte]

14. I wish I could believe in some sort of a god.

It'd be nice to think there was some sort of a plan.

[Haole Girl]

21. I do believe ...

..in God. But I do not believe there is a perfectly planned universe. There is too much evidence to the contrary.

[Critters2]

16. I hate it too.

It's just bad theology.

[Haole Girl]

22. Yep. nt

[tjwmason]

70. Exactly

A complete rejection of free-will.

[Connonym]

19. I LOVE the expression "God's in the bathtub"

popularized by the website TWOP -- meaning essentially don't bother him with the petty shit

[Haole Girl]

23. WTF?

I've never heard that one. How idiotic!

[Connonym]

31. oh it's meant to be snarky

Like you might use it in response to someone talking about God helping their team win or something equally as unimportant. I'm not explaining it well.

[Haole Girl]

35. Well, I get what they are trying to say....

..but, think about it: How little faith do they have in God?

Can God only handle one crisis per day... only a major crisis?

I remember one prayer group I ended up in when I was young... the woman leading the group claimed God needed a first and last name! lol! How ridiculous!!

[Manifestor_of_Light]

65. I thought his last name was "damn"??????

:rofl:

[Critters2]

33. That's great!!

I'll be using that one!

[crim son]

20. Yep. It's bullshit.

Yes "He" does. Every day, all over this world. One reason why I'm not a big believer in the compassionate Christian God.

[Haole Girl]

25. It is bullshit. nt

[democracyindanger]

29. Then explain children.

[Haole Girl]

32. HA!

Good one! :D

[TK421]

30. "Just deal with it" ....just-plain-lazy

:mad: if I just dealt with it, I could wind up in prison

[Haole Girl]

34. Yeah... that one is rather condescending, isn't it? nt

[JVS]

36. Would you prefer "God crushes those who displease him without mercy"?

[Haole Girl]

39. No!

;-)

[JVS]

43. Well that's one of the main alternatives

Both statements are the result of theological systems in which it is acknowledged that God is either a passive or active participant in the suffering of the individual. The ideas that he is unaware or unable to stop it are not in play here. This leads to multiple ways of dealing with it. I'd much rather people go around saying "God wouldn't give you too much to handle", which implies a deity who hates us less than "Don't plan on being able to handle this, God's pissed at you and smiting you"

[Haole Girl]

44. I don't believe in either extreme. If God was perfect...

..there wouldn't be satan.

But, I don't know much about theology. It's just IMHO.

[ThomCat]

95. Actually, "God doesn't give a damn."

and "There is no God" are two of the better alternatives. :P

[CaliforniaPeggy]

37. My dear KC2...

I'm with you on this one, sweetie!

It's bullshit...



:hug:

[Haole Girl]

40. Yes, it is...

Thanks. :hug:

[devilgrrl]

41. "God makes shit up to fit MY narrow point of view"

How about that one?

[Haole Girl]

42. That would be a good response

:rofl:

[KitchenWitch]

45. When God closes a door, He opens a window...

x(

[Haole Girl]

46. Ugh. I always picture someone falling out of a window!

:hi:

[Gold Metal Flake]

47. "something good will come from this"

Grrrrr.

[Haole Girl]

50. Luckily, I don't hear that one often. nt

[Gold Metal Flake]

59. It's all of a type, I think.

All of these phrases are shallow and kind of callous. I think there is a little calling of the flock to it. Sort of "now don't you dare go questioning your faith. I will force you to reaffirm it with me by uttering this empty trifle. You wouldn't dare be discourtious by calling me out on my shallowness. After all, I am being siiiinceeeere".

Or, maybe it's just me.

[Fire Walk With Me]

48. Especially because people have free will.

And some bring ruin upon themselves through their own actions and beliefs, and others are overly willing to use others as emotional toilets when they can't and won't deal with their own disasters.

PLEASE let God be part of the equation. We're losin' it down here.

[Haole Girl]

51. That free will thing will get mere humans every time! nt

[flvegan]

49. Replace "God" with "life in general" or "karma" and let me know

what you find out.

[Haole Girl]

52. Still don't like it. nt

[flvegan]

55. "Like" is funny.

Totally subjective and whatnot.

[Haole Girl]

56. Well, I am too tired to tackle that one...

..G'night. :hi:

[Richardo]

53. "Yeah, but Satan really piles the shit on."

Is what I'd say.

[Haole Girl]

54. That's a good comeback, really. nt

[Lethe]

57. tell that to my friend who watched both of his parents die of cancer

and he was a devout Christian who prayed every day.

He is not a christian now. In fact, he will kick your ass if you mention it.

And not to mention that 17,000 children starve to death every day. I think God is giving them more than they can handle.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

66. Random cancer and death will do that to you.

Show you their words are meaningless.

[From The Ashes]

58. Bullshit...

complete and utter bullshit...That's what I tell people when they say that to me. I can tell you that God has given me far far more than I can handle this year, and I'd be grateful if he'd give some of this shit to someone else. Like you know who.

[Richard Steele]

60. I've personally known at least seven people who disagreed, if you know what I mean. nm

[Skittles]

61. it's ridiculous

suicides alone disprove it

[QueenOfCalifornia]

62. All good things

come to those who wait.

WTF is that about? If I wait long enough I will find the winning lottery ticket or grasp that elusive brass ring called success?

Dumb villagers.

[DarkTirade]

63. I usually respond with 'So handle THIS!' and stick a kni... err... I mean...

I tell them they are foolish and walk away. O8)

[Guava Jelly]

64. There is no god

So the phrase is bullshit

[Manifestor_of_Light]

67. AND if you ask your church to help you out, they won't.........

uh huh.....that means that when they won't help you (not charity, but other kinds of help) they're gonna get badmouthed by you in the future to people you know.

[QMPMom]

68. I hate it, too.

I have gotten that platitude hundreds of times from well-meaning people who have seen what difficulty we sometimes had when our DD was growing up. She is mentally handicapped and raising her (she is now 21) has been an adventure from the moment she was born.

I love my daughter so much that it hurts, but it has been difficult at times. She, at one time, had a Dr. for every body part, and the stress to the family has often been tremendous.

We handled it, and would go through it all again for our beautiful daughter, but it would have been nice to not to have had to.

For those people that say to me, "God doesn't gie you more than you can handle.": Try living our lives for a day and see if you ever say that again.

[Callalily]

69. That expression makes

absolutely no sense, I hate it too. And here's another one - "it can't get any worse". Not true because it can and it does.

:hug:

[ScreamingMeemie]

72. I hate it too.

I am proof of the exact opposite.

[Midlodemocrat]

73. Hi, sweetie. I just sent you an email.

You're being a wonderful mom to those beautiful children. You are putting them in first place above your grief and you should be proud of yourself.

I can't even begin to imagine the depth of your pain, but your strength is absolutely awe inspiring and your children are extremely lucky to have you.

Bless you, my friend.

[Haole Girl]

77. Hey!

:hug: :hi:

[AirmensMom]

78. Hi MrsG.

:hug: It's good to see you again. I'm so sorry you're going through this. It definitely proves that people get more than they can handle. :hug:

[redqueen]

90. ...

:hug:

[supernova]

93. Hugs

:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

[Vidar]

74. "Pain, like guilt, may just be God's way of hurting us." - Firesign Theater.

I may have it backwards, but it works either way.

[Tyler Durden]

84. It's "Fear, Like Pain...."

Good Bless you, and God Night.

And Please Don't Touch That Dial!

-The Rear Reverend Sport Trindleburg

[Vidar]

88. You're so right!

[SmokingJacket]

75. Me too.

People would never commit suicide or even die if it were true.

[spinbaby]

76. Have you noticed with the fires....

On the TV coverage of the fires, I've noticed that God gets the credit when a house is saved, but nature gets the blame when a house burns.

[redqueen]

91. I hadn't thought about that...

but yeah... that's extremely disturbing, actually.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

80. me too.

[Deep13]

81. What a load of crap.

What about those who end up dying from their suffering? Is that more than they can handle? And why should god send us any amount of suffering unless he is really just a cruel bastard.

[NewJeffCT]

83. Does that mean if you're an atheist, you can handle anything?

Or nothing?

[RebelOne]

92. I'm an atheist and have been in some pretty tough situations

and handled them quite well without any help from any god.

[quip]

85. I look at it this way:

The phrase usually evoked as consolation and reassurement in times of trouble. Yeah, it's clumsy and theologically suspect, but not everyone is a clear-thinking rationalist-- but everyone can be a friend who is there for another in need. THAT's the important part of that phrase, IMO

:hug:

[guitar man]

86. I do too

If that's true, why in the fuck am I hiring a bankruptcy attorney :shrug:

[ThomCat]

100. I don't know why

But I do hope that it works out for the best. I hope you can dig yourself out and rebuild.

[Pierre.Suave]

87. that is because

he DOESNT exist...

therefore, it is impossible for him to give me anything.

[ThomCat]

99. There you go, being logical.

:P

[redqueen]

89. Me too. Lots of people get more than they can handle.

The lucky ones have friends and loved ones to help them share the burden.

[ThomCat]

98. Absolutely!

I know that the only reason I am able to keep going is because of the help I get from good friends.

And part of that is the encouragement and emotional support from good people I've met here. :hug:

[easttexaslefty]

94. I feel like I've been given way more than I can handle

so what does that mean? I hate when people say this to me. I know they mean well, but how do they know how much I can take. My mom died an ugly death from cancer last dec. My father-in-law who I took care of died at home from lung cancer in April, and 5 weeks ago I found my oldest son dead and hanging in his work shop.I feel I have been thru more tahn I can handle.

[Midlodemocrat]

101. Oh, my. I am so very sorry for the loss of your son.

What a terrible thing for you to have to endure. :hug: and welcome to DU.

[ChickMagic]

96. When I was 6 years old

my little brother died. When we went back to church, the
preacher called out my mother and said, "If you had lived
your life right, Phillip would still be alive today."

I've been a nonbeliever ever since.

[ThomCat]

97. $%#@&!

:nuke: :grr: :nuke:

I want to find a way to go back in time and smack that bastard upside the head. What kind of asshole says something like that?

:hug:

[ChickMagic]

102. A Southern Baptist hellfire preacher

For some reason, he came over to our house once a week just in
time for dinner. He mooched off everybody. I still remember his
name - Brother Massey.

Believe me, I would have taken him down myself, but I could only
bite his kneecaps. My mother was devastated by that. It scarred
her for life.

Worse still, in order to keep from feeling responsible, she blamed
me. He and I had been playing on swings and I accidentally hit him
with the seat. He got a shiner that never went away. They took him
to the doc and it turned out that the swing didn't cause the bruise.
He had an enormous brain tumor pushing out causing the bruise.

Even though his body was filled with cancer, it was a stroke from
that bruise that actually killed him. When my sister died a few
years ago, Mom and I were talking on the phone. She said, "I know
you didn't mean to kill Phillip". I blame Bro. Massey for that.

Thanks for the hug. You have no idea how much I needed that.
:hug:

[Haole Girl]

103. That is so awful

:hug:

[ChickMagic]

104. Thanks

It had a domino effect and shit ran downhill. :hug:

[applegrove]

105. I don't agree. Some people are very unlucky in the situations they find themselves.

You can be put beyond your ability to cope. Why there is PTSD. Look at the soldiers..what was it..one in 7?

[martymar64]

107. Tell that to the Residents of Pompeii

or Hiroshima.

I hate that phrase too. :mad: