Kudzu; It's going places.

[puerco-bellies]

Dear God I'm bored. It was this or updating my resume.

http://www.nps.gov/plants/alien/fact/pumo1.htm

:popcorn:

[Gormy Cuss]

1. Hah!

Before I clicked to open this I thought "gee, puerco-bellies must be bored."

[puerco-bellies]

2. For God's sake, I'm updating my resume

I don't think I could possibly be more bored.

[JohnnyLib2]

3. Here ya go --kudzu candles

www.themississippigiftcompany.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWPROD&ProdID=752


(Before you ask, I married a Mississippi gal)

[puerco-bellies]

6. Even though I'm a Southerner (California) I did not know Kudzu bore flowers

They're pretty.

[Quantess]

8. people used to plant kudzu on purpose.

SO many invasive plants are invasive because people encouraged them.

[lost-in-nj]

4. ....

:spank: :spank: :spank:

ALI???? SAVE US!!!!!


:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

:hi:

lost

[puerco-bellies]

7. Muwah ha ha ha hawh!!

She is toting one soon to be Puerco-boy to a buddy's house. Otherwise I WOULD be working on my resume.

[ghostsofgiants]

5. I am bullish on it.

[puerco-bellies]

9. That's the spirit

:hippie:

[texanwitch]

10. All you need is goats.

They eat kudzu like crazy.

[puerco-bellies]

11. That may be true

But I think a "Bullish on Goats" thread would sink even faster.

[texanwitch]

12. Maybe a thread about how to cook goats that have been eating Kudzu.

I like goat meat.

[puerco-bellies]

13. So do I.

When I was young my Grandfathers generation on both sides would raise and slaughter goats for special occasions. The dressed goat would be wrapped in yucca leaves like a mummy and then pit roasted all day.
I have not had goat as good since my elder generation passed on.

[Quantess]

14. Goats are an invasive animal

in many parts of the world. How fitting would that be!

[texanwitch]

15. Thats why goats are so good for getting rid of kudzu, they tend to kill the roots.

The goats have a lot of kudzu to eat.

[Quantess]

16. Goats are also great at eating invasive blackberry vines in the Pacific NW

http://www.uniquevenues.com/news.cfm?action=press_detail&press_id=140

[texanwitch]

23. I have a friend who's family as a growing goat herd.

They rent out the goats to clear out the kudzu, and sell goat meat.

They are making a living, keeping the family farm.

[texanwitch]

24. Kudzu forever.

:headbang:

Kudzu has lots uses and it is a herb.

[Capn Sunshine]

53. Isn't that a Beatles song?

[Ellen Forradalom]

17. STOP IT

STOP THE MADNESS

[puerco-bellies]

25. Nope.

Not going to happen.

[Capn Sunshine]

52. Too Late !! SAVE YOURSELF

The virus has been unleashed!

[Ellen Forradalom]

59. Kudzu: it's coming after YOU!

RUN FOR YOUR LIFE

[GoneOffShore]

18. Please Remove this thread

[puerco-bellies]

26. The Mods have be paid off.

Join us, there's room for one more.

[texanwitch]

31. Yes, please join us.

Kudzu feed goat is very good.

[I Have A Dream]

72. I think that he's referencing the 'Please Remove' thread that...

went on forever. He was one of the people who kept it alive! :)

[ChoralScholar]

19. Say what?

[puerco-bellies]

27. Kudzu, that's what.

Thank you, come again.

[Quantess]

77. Something about the super-cold and the dry heat that kudzu doesn't like.

Apparently that's why it hasn't spread this far west....yet!

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

20. I think this time I'm getting into this thread on the ground floor.

:rofl:

[puerco-bellies]

28. How very wise.

:headbang:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

21. My dear puerco-bellies!

I only have ONE thing to say to you, sweetie!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!





:banghead:

:grr:

:spank:

:cry:

[puerco-bellies]

29. Sorry Miss C-P

I was bored and well, the gun was just laying there.

[Ellen Forradalom]

67. What, no "My dear kudzu!" post?

:hide:

[GreenPartyVoter]

22. Nooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!

[puerco-bellies]

30. Yes, yes indeed.

It's back!

[texanwitch]

32. Only really cold weather kills it, for awhile.

The roots grow deep.

[Arkansas Granny]

33. I found the growing instructions for kudzu.

Choosing a Plot:
Kudzu can be grown almost anywhere, so site selection is not the problem it is with some other finicky plants like strawberries. Although kudzu will grow quite well on cement, for best result you should select an area having at least some dirt. To avoid possible lawsuits, it is advisable to plant well away from your neighbors house, unless, of course, you don't get along well with your neighbor anyway.

Preparing the Soil:
Go out and stomp on the soil for a while just to get its attention and to prepare it for kudzu.

Deciding When to Plant:
Kudzu should always be planted at night. If kudzu is planted during daylight hours, angry neighbors might see you and begin throwing rocks at you.

Selecting the Proper Fertilizer:
The best fertilizer I have discovered for kudzu is 40 weight non-detergent motor oil. Kudzu actually doesn't need anything to help it grow, but the motor oil helps to prevent scraping the underside of the tender leaves when the kudzu starts its rapid growth. It also cuts down on the friction and lessens the danger of fire when the kudzu really starts to move. Change oil once every thousand feet or every two weeks which ever comes first.

Mulching the Plants:
Contrary to what may be told by the Extension Service, kudzu can profit from a good mulch. I have found that a heavy mulch for the young plants produces a hardier crop. For best results, as soon as the young shoots begin to appear, cover kudzu with concrete blocks. Although this causes a temporary setback, your kudzu will accept this mulch as a challenge and will reward you with redoubled determination in the long run.

More advice here:

http://www.locksley.com/kudzu.htm

[puerco-bellies]

34. Sadly Kudzu would inprove my yard.

How pissed could the neighbors get?

[texanwitch]

35. Well, when their house is covered in kudzu they wouldn't have to paint it again.

Couldn't be any worse then ivy.

[puerco-bellies]

36. CaliforniaPeggy lives about 3/4 of a mile from me.

What would be my survival time line be once it engulfed her house?

[texanwitch]

37. Only 3/4 of mile, that is nothing for kudzu.

It would take only a week at the most to get to CaliforniaPeggys house.

You can get packed up and ready to go in that time.

Kudzu would love California.

[momophile]

38. unbelievable. I love it.

this tread, that is. not kudzu. it's terrible.

[texanwitch]

39. It gets better.

Queen of Kudzu

By: Angela Gillaspie © January 2003

I hail from the South, as y'all can tell,

Tipping cows and gigging frogs, spittin' in a pail.



I'm the Queen of Kudzu!

I love NASCAR and save bacon grease,

Swat away June Bugs as I pick a fat peach.

My backyard has four half-nekkid younguns

Digging in the red clay, fighting over wild onions.



I'm the Queen of Kudzu!

I swim in a spring - I swim in a crick

I've even been known to taste a salt lick.

I sit on the front porch, rocking in the twilight,

Crickets and cicadas saw - I love the music of night.

Below the moon, I've run nekkid through the corn

Just 'cause I could - there's no need for scorn.



I'm the Queen of Kudzu!

I wear a lightning bug ring,

Go fishing for cats and love to hear Elvis sing.

I love Jesus and pray many times a day

His promise is true - I try to live His way.



I'm the Queen of Kudzu!

I watch the snow fall on the pines,

Then rush to buy milk and bread down at the five-and-dime.

I fry my chicken, taters, okra, and cornbread,

Roll out my biscuits - my family is well fed.

I pick poke salet and kudzu too,

Cook 'em up with fat back and will serve them to you.

My gravy is chocolate, tomato, Sawmill, and red-eyed

I'm the Queen of Kudzu - on a John Deere I ride!





Click here to subscribe to my stories! - It's free!

Click here to tell a friend about this page!


Stay tuned for more SouthernAngel's redneck poetry!

Copyright © 2003, Angela Gillaspie
Revised - 1/21/03
URL: http://www.SouthernAngel.com
E-mail: [e-mail]

[momophile]

41. you weren't kiddin'! this thread did get even better

that's a great poem!
:hi:

[texanwitch]

47. There is another poem I have to find.

It is kind of creepy.

[texanwitch]

49. Here is the poem

ALL: Kudzu

Japan invades. Far Eastern vines
Run from the clay banks they are

Supposed to keep from eroding.
Up telephone poles,
Which rear, half out of leafage
As though they would shriek,
Like things smothered by their own
Green, mindless, unkillable ghosts.
In Georgia, the legend says
That you must close your windows

At night to keep it out of the house.
The glass is tinged with green, even so,

As the tendrils crawl over the fields.
The night the kudzu has
Your pasture, you sleep like the dead.
Silence has grown Oriental
And you cannot step upon ground:
Your leg plunges somewhere
It should not, it never should be,
Disappears, and waits to be struck

Anywhere between sole and kneecap:
For when the kudzu comes,

The snakes do, and weave themselves
Among its lengthening vines,
Their spade heads resting on leaves,
Growing also, in earthly power
And the huge circumstance of concealment.
One by one the cows stumble in,
Drooling a hot green froth,
And die, seeing the wood of their stalls

Strain to break into leaf.
In your closed house, with the vine

Tapping your window like lightning,
You remember what tactics to use.
In the wrong yellow fog-light of dawn
You herd them in, the hogs,
Head down in their hairy fat,
The meaty troops, to the pasture.
The leaves of the kudzu quake
With the serpents' fear, inside

The meadow ringed with men
Holding sticks, on the country roads.

The hogs disappear in the leaves.
The sound is intense, subhuman,
Nearly human with purposive rage.
There is no terror
Sound from the snakes.
No one can see the desperate, futile
Striking under the leaf heads.
Now and then, the flash of a long

Living vine, a cold belly,
Leaps up, torn apart, then falls

Under the tussling surface.
You have won, and wait for frost,
When, at the merest touch
Of cold, the kudzu turns
Black, withers inward and dies,
Leaving a mass of brown strings
Like the wires of a gigantic switchboard.
You open your windows,

With the lightning restored to the sky
And no leaves rising to bury

You alive inside your frail house,
And you think, in the opened cold,
Of the surface of things and its terrors,
And of the mistaken, mortal
Arrogance of the snakes
As the vines, growing insanely, sent
Great powers into their bodies
And the freedom to strike without warning:

From them, though they killed
Your cattle, such energy also flowed

To you from the knee-high meadow
(It was as though you had
A green sword twined among
The veins of your growing right arm--
Such strength as you would not believe
If you stood alone in a proper
Shaved field among your safe cows--):
Came in through your closed

Leafy windows and almighty sleep
And prospered, till rooted out.

James Dickey

More Poems Site Search

[SPKrazy]

40. Kudzu...

if only it were a cure for cancer or something

then

we'd have lots of that...

:(


Instead we have kudzu threads

and

:rofl:

:popcorn:

and

:spray:

alien plants it says so in the info at the link

[texanwitch]

42. It makes really good jelly.

Some people even eat it, fried.

[puerco-bellies]

43. Your kidding?

As a herb what is it used for?

[texanwitch]

45. It is a great herb.

by David J. Hanson, Ph. D.

Kudzu is an invasive vine (Pueraria lobata) that flourishes in many southern states. It was introduced into the US from Asia decades ago to reduce soil erosion.

The plant has been used in traditional Chinese medicine for over 2,500 years. During a trip to China, chemist Dr. David Lee noticed that many people use an herbal tea containing kudzu. Its name in Chinese, loosely translated, means "drunkenness dispeller." The tea is often used to sober up after drinking alcohol and to relieve hangovers.

In 1991, Dr. Lee and scientists at a university in China began testing a compound derived from this tea with lab rats that had been given alcohol. They found that it improved the rats' motor coordination, or made them act less intoxicated. 1

The next year Dr. Lee suggested to researchers at the Bowles Center for Alcohol Studies that they test kudzu to see if it would reduce alcohol consumption among strains of rats that had been selectively bread to crave alcohol.

As a result, the researchers administered compounds from kudzu root (daidzin and daidzein) to the special lab rats. The investigators found that the compounds significantly reduced the rats’ alcohol intake. 2

These very promising results have led to research involving humans. Administering a kudzu root extract twice daily failed to produce any significant differences in craving and sobriety scores between veterans taking the extract and those taking a placebo. 3

However, a small clinical study of 14 men and women who were heavy drinkers found that kudzu reduced the quantity of alcohol they consumed. The investigator speculated that the puerarin in kudzu increases blood alcohol concentration so that people need less alcohol to feel its effects. 4

The evidence regarding kudzu’s effectiveness is mixed and much more research needs to be conducted.

In the meantime it’s a case of buyer beware. Researchers at McLean Hospital in Belmont, Massachusetts purchased a variety of kudzu extracts from stores and Internet sites, tested them, and found that none of them worked to reduce craving for alcohol. Analyses revealed that all of the products contained less than one percent of active kudzu. To have any effect a product would need to be at least 30-40% kudzu and be taken at least twice a day. 5

There are no studies to demonstrate that kudzu can serve as a morning-after potion for eliminating hangovers as used in traditional Chinese practice. The best way to prevent hangovers is to drink in moderation or abstain. There is some evidence that drinking clear distilled spirits beverages such as vodka or gin reduces the severity of hangovers, other things being equal.



References and Readings
Additional Information
Drink Too Much?
Cut D

[SPKrazy]

44. no way

:shrug:

who knew

:rofl:

[texanwitch]

46. Yes way.

People in the great depression ate kudzu and it is a really good animal feed.

It isn't be used.

There is a lot of money to be made with kudzu.

[SPKrazy]

50. well what are we doing posting on DU

let's get busy :D

:hi:

[struggle4progress]

48. Kudzu Candy (no difficult measuring spoons or thermometers required!)

Melt Almond Bark or flavored candy melts from a craft store in a double boiler add raisins nuts and crushed, dried kudzu leaves. Smooth on a sheet of wax paper; let cool then break into small pieces http://www.nancybasket.com/gpage.html

Legal notice: This recipe has been posted without any warranty, actual or implied, regarding its safety or efficacy. The act of reading the recipe constitutes an agreement to indemnify and hold harmless risk of any potential side effects (including but not limited to watery eyes, hives, projectile vomiting or sudden death) which may result from use

[GoneOffShore]

51. Sounds yummy

Could possibly make it with plain caramelized sugar though - and corn flakes.

[struggle4progress]

55. It would make a great coffee table book: 1000 kudzu-free kudzu recipes!

[GoneOffShore]

56. What a great idea!

And pictures of kudzu and methods of disposing of it.

[Reverend_Smitty]

54. These kudzu posts are like actual kudzu

they will be a part of the lounge forever

[Fire Walk With Me]

82. Ding!

Virus alerts are in themselves virii.

[crim son]

57. Oh crap.

Couldn't stop yourself, could you?

[Call Me Wesley]

58. Lock ...

Ah, never mind. :hi:

[puerco-bellies]

60. NOOOOOooooo! Not again.

The shout out to you and Heidi is what really got this monster revived.

[I Have A Dream]

74. You don't have to fear him anymore. He doesn't have a little guy next...

to his name anymore.

:bounce:

(I love CMW though!)

[sarge43]

79. Forget about it, Wesley. Kudzu Rules. n/t

[Arugula Latte]

61. Can't ... resist ... Siren Call ... of Kudzu thread ...

*click* *post*

[Sock Puppet]

62. calling swag!!

:bounce:

[texanwitch]

63. Where is swag.

Everyone needs to post in the kudzu thread.

[swag]

80. ahoy hoy!

[puerco-bellies]

84. There she is..

Hi Swag!!!
:hi:

[sarge43]

64. Oh no! The Son of the Bride of Kudzu Returns!!

and he's somewhat annoyed.

[Book Lover]

65. *rubs eyes* Could it be...?

The Resurrection and the Life! Oh, Kudzu! How I've missed you...

http://www.etext.org/Zines/Kudzu/kudzu_core.html

[madinmaryland]

66. Oh Shit, here we go again!

[Ellen Forradalom]

68. Oh, it's more than just going places...

...it ate your car for lunch.

[texanwitch]

75. That only took kudzu 5 minutes to do that.

All :headbang: kudzu.

[I Have A Dream]

69. Yeeeehaaaaaa!

:bounce::bounce::bounce:

:woohoo::woohoo::woohoo:

[puerco-bellies]

70. Dean is that you?

:rofl:

[SallyMander]

71. ...

:spray:

[BarenakedLady]

73. Yay!

The other one was before my time.

:D

[texanwitch]

76. That was a great thread,

The posts weren't always about kudzu.

[ruiner4u]

78. K&R

[Tommy_Carcetti]

81. I'm afraid Kudzu is long gone after Marlette's death last year

[Fire Walk With Me]

83. Deleted sub-thread

[puerco-bellies]

85. Just a little post whoring before bed time

Nothing to see here, move along.