With apologies to flvegan, LeftyMom, billyskank, ThomCat and all the vegans on DU.

[Midlodemocrat]

Yesterdy my neighbor called to tell me that there was some guy hawking meat (!) from a freezer in the back of his truck. We get a lot of these types of 'salespeople' around here, lots of houses, easy to walk, blah, blah, blah. But seriously, Meat? From the back of his truck? Anyway.

Well, Lisa calls to tell me not to answer the door because he was really, really pushy and tenacious. So I don't plan to, but BabyMidlo had a friend coming over and as luck would have it, Meat Man and Friend of BabyMidlo arrived at the same time.

So there he was standing on my porch and starting his spiel. I said "Sorry, we're vegans" and shut the door.

Still not sure how I came up with that so quickly. :scratches head:

[LostinVA]

1. For some reason "Meat Man" cracks me up

[JVS]

7. The Meat Man Cometh

[LostinVA]

9. Dun dun duuuuunnnnnnnn

[unpossibles]

17. like Stew in Strangers With Candy?

[Tommy_Carcetti]

18. Simmer down, Stew!

What's your beef, Stew?

[billyskank]

2. My brother once told a cold-calling double glazing salesman that we had no windows.

:hi:

[Critters2]

22. LOL!!! That's brilliant!! nt

[LeftyMom]

3. I had to do that once. The guy took a step back like I'd told him I had a contagious disease.

:rofl:

[billyskank]

10. Well you do have an eating disorder.

[LeftyMom]

14. I've also learned on DU that I'm missing many vital nutrients.

This would be news to my doctor, but she's a lifelong lacto-vegetarian from a country bursting with vegetarians, so she's probably in on the dietary conspiracy.

[billyskank]

15. Yes, you'll never grow up big and strong like flvegan.

[LeftyMom]

16. Yeah I know, I mean that one time when I tried to pin him down that didn't work at all.

:rofl:

It was fun though.

[sasquatch]

4. Why didn't you just throw an empty wine bottle like always?

:D

[Midlodemocrat]

5. Hello? Small children in the way.

:rofl:

[sasquatch]

21. Is your aim that bad?

:D

[LeftyMom]

6. The boxes only hurt if the corner hits you in the eye.

Took forever for the swelling to go down though. Midlo's a mean drunk. :cry:

[LostinVA]

8. She's back on the box

They're not an effective projectile.

[Gormy Cuss]

11. Yeah, see the story goes he had a restaurant cancel on this big order.....

The meat cartons were dented from the fall off of the original truck, no doubt.

[youthere]

12. I have three general rules re: food that I have learned from experience...

1. never eat anything that came via US Postal Service if you didn't specifically request it.
2. never eat sushi anyplace that isn't a sushi restaraunt...especially if it comes free with a fill-up
3. never buy meat from a location that has to be emissions tested.

[flvegan]

13. bwahahaha!!!

:rofl:

[unpossibles]

19. I once bought 2 gallons of extra virgin olive oil from some dude

I made the sure the cans were not opened or tampered with, and when the guy's original offer was $20 for both (!) I got him down to $10, knowing they were probably stolen, and he agreed.

It's kind of crazy to have that much olive oil. I used in/on everything. Yes, everything

[cabraverde]

20. Those meat wagons are a scam

I have no idea why someone whold ever buy a frozen chunk of beef from the back of a truck. Usualy the cost is no cheaper than buying from a good butcher but the quality is about the same as shoe leather.

I have even heard that the meat comes from milk cows that are not producing anymore.

[Rabrrrrrr]

23. I had one of those guys come to my place once. Scary.

I can't imagine what sort of condition the meat is in.

[sniffa]

24. pffft

:rofl:

[stuntcat]

25. That was your first step!

You're turning vegan, THAT's where it came from so quick. Don't fight it :headbang: