"I'm going to be honest with you."

[YankeyMCC]

Do you know people who say this? I do, one person at least, and it absolutely annoys me, does it mean they are not normally honest with me?

It has always annoyed me but I always just brushed it off as just one of the little things your SO does that needs to be accepted as part of who they are, just some expression she picked up somehow that never really meant anything.

But now she has gone from my SO to me STBE (Soon to be Ex-wife) and it is pissing me off.

We're going through mediation but that is taking time in the meantime we have had a verbal agreement on a couple of things. Most importantly a physical custody schedule for our son. When she first broke the news to me we discussed what we wanted, I made a proposal and wrote it up - informally but just so we had something to remember and reference - and she agreed.

Months later she decided she did not want to follow that agreement. I agreed to renegotiate, we did, we sat down and discussed it, again I wrote up what we discussed and sent it to her to read and confirm, again she agreed.

Several days later she decides she does not agree. I ask her what the issue is, tell her to make her changes to the schedule, days later she tells me what change she wants - I agree.

Days later she says she does not want to stick to that agreement.

I had several other ideas but I was frustrated that she would not stick to her word and didn't want to waste my time discussing and fleshing them out anymore, she would not stick to any agreements.

Finally I do describe another idea, "I'll be honest with you. I like this one the best so far."

Now she's going to be honest with me?!? WTF! Why couldn't she be honest before and Not Agree if she didn't like what was in the earlier agreements and thus allow us to get this settled in time to give our son a stable situation as soon as possible.

And she gets mad at me if I keep bringing up "agreements" ? :eyes:

[FloridaJudy]

1. When some one says "I'm going to be honest with you"

What follows is never good.

[datasuspect]

2. i'd be afraid that they hitherto weren't being honest.

"you're gonna be honest with me? were you dishonest before?"

[Monk06]

3. I'm going to say something really insulting to you, but don't take it personally.