Has anyone ever participated in an intervention?

[Lady Effingbroke]

If so, was it successful?

Thanks for any and all replies!

[CreekDog]

1. No and I always feel like I'm on the verge of getting one

Perhaps for being paranoid. :yoiks:

[JVS]

19. I'll tip you off before it happens

[CreekDog]

21. thank you

sometimes my attendance at confessional LCMS congregations lags.

[JVS]

22. I once heard a story from a guy in WELS who got excommunicated for non-attendance

He felt that it was a fair deal. He'd not been coming enough and they no longer felt sure enough that he believed the teachings of the church because he sure as hell wasn't hearing the teachings of the church.

When I volunteered to work in making the directory, I asked a pastor's wife how many people we should expect and she said that although we technically list 800 some members, that only about 600 come regularly. And that when she calls to say "Hey, you guys want to be taken off or what?" They say "Oh, no. Leave us listed."

I've been very lax this lent. I need to work on it.

[CreekDog]

23. well, i've been attending an LCMS congregation

but not my home, San Mateo, hyper confessional one, so we'll see what happens. might have to transfer to this one. my church starts at 9am and they close the doors if you're late (they let you in a bit later, but still) so if I'm running late I just go to my nearest church, Daly City, which is the one I grew up in anyway and they know me better, sometimes it's more comfortable just kind of lax.

[Xipe Totec]

2. Not directly, and the results were mixed

Damn near destroyed the family.

Had the intervention occurred here, in the US, there would have probably been kidnap charges filed.

No joke.

[Lady Effingbroke]

3. That's the impression I get after reading a bit about them.

Seems like the interventionee is basically kidnapped and hauled off to rehab.

I don't think it would go well, anyway.

[Xipe Totec]

4. That's exactly what it was

Except the rehab facility was not too different from Devil's Island in French Guiana.

[Lady Effingbroke]

5. Forcible detainment doesn't seem the most promising way to begin living as a clean 'n sober citizen,

even if the interventionee is free, if he so chooses, to sign himself out of rehab.

[graywarrior]

6. Yes

It was a disaster.

[Lady Effingbroke]

7. I think this one would be, too.

I don't think anyone would be willing to participate except me, everything that would be said has already been said ad nauseum, and the interventionee would more than likely become extremely hostile once the true purpose of the little get-together was revealed.

Oh well.

[graywarrior]

10. The one I was went to was attended by a bunch of well meaning control freaks with a

"message" for the victim. It was pathetic...and it failed. Lots of dramatic screaming and yelling and the guy is still out there drinking and drugging.

[Lady Effingbroke]

11. Well, since my family is comprised exclusively of well meaning control freaks,

any intervention likely would have little success.

And be pathetic.

And the guy would, well, end up still out there drinking and drugging.

[graywarrior]

12. Interventions breed resentments which feeds alcohol/drug addictions

[Lady Effingbroke]

14. This guy is already resentful enough and is currently feeding his various addictions quite well.

He doesn't need any more help in that department!

[graywarrior]

15. Sounds like a million other us's out there at one time or another.

You don't stop til you're ready to stop. And even then you're probably gonna be out there again within weeks, if not days.

[Critters2]

8. Yes. Wasn't as bad as what others here have written about,

but it didn't work. In EA we say "We come to meetings for ourselves, not for anther person." This is true of any recovery. If the person's heart ain't in it, they won't do the necessary work. You have to wait for them to decide they've hit bottom. Imo.

[Lady Effingbroke]

9. I agree.

I think all those of us associated with this person can do at this point is cut him loose and let him go; IOW no more 'enabling' behavior.

I have more than a sneaking suspicion that 'botttom' for him is a coffin, if so, then so be it, I guess - I can do no more to help him.

[Rabrrrrrr]

13. There are a great many kinds of intervention.

Done by a great many people, some which go successfully, and some which do not.

From the major: Drugs - cults - alcohol - gambling - and so forth, to the minor: keeping someone from getting married, dropping out of college, or quitting their job, and so forth.

They all have different methods, and even within each category are a wide variety of methods.

Best idea, usually, is to involve a professional who knows what he/she is doing, whether psychologist/psychiatrist, someone who knows how to deal with cults, and so forth.

[Lady Effingbroke]

16. This would be for drugs and alcohol.

This person has a lifelong history of abusing drugs and alcohol to the point of loss of employment, DUIs, etc. He also has a 5-year-old child, which exacerbates the situation to a great degree, at least to me.

If an intervention were to be done, a highly competent and experienced professional would definitely be needed.

[yardwork]

17. I'm sorry that you are going through this.

I know one person for whom an intervention appears to have worked, but the person had a lot to lose professionally, and it was his professional colleagues who intervened. Maybe that's why the intervention and very long rehab stint worked (so far - it's been several years). I don't know.

My impression is that interventions work less well with folks who have already lost a lot. If the person in question has already lost employment, had DUIs, and is neglecting their child, it seems unlikely that an intervention would work.

But what do I know? What does anyone know?

Take care of yourself and do what you can to take care of the child. Hugs to you.

[Lady Effingbroke]

27. Thank you for your kind reply. Sadly, I agree with your assessment.

My family and I are doing the best we can for the child (my niece). Luckily, her mother is gainfully employed and also doing the best she can, as well.

[KitchenWitch]

18. Not a professionally led one.

My mom and I singlehandedly performed one on my dad. We all entered a family treatment program and he has been sober ever since.

[Heidi]

20. Yes, in terms of the person's long-term health, it was successful.

It was a one-on-one intervention with one of my ex-husband's sons. After a four-hour conversation in my car, I drove him to detox and then co-signed a guarantee that his monthlong stay at a treatment center would be paid. He has been clean for about 15 years.

[yardwork]

28. That's wonderful! Good for you - you saved his life and who knows how many others.

[Heidi]

29. His parents' idea of an intervention

was to browbeat him with the Bible until he felt like an utterly useless and irredeemable piece of crap, instead of someone with a treatable illness. I love my ex-husband's kids and didn't see guilt-mongering as an effective treatment. :)

ETA: I take no credit for saving my step-son. Once he got into a treatment program, all of the hard work was his.

[elleng]

24. Yes, and yes.

I ended up conducting it, solo, on my 'fiance,' as his family was not available and I didn't want to put up with him any longer. Spoke to a counselor at facility/hosp that I thought would be good for him to attend, and guy said that I could do it. Said, do it at a sober time (first thing in morning, here,) have brief list of concrete events indicating extent of problem (job probs, auto probs, etc) and consequences if he refuses (get out of this apartment, no enabling from x,y,z,) etc.

So it worked, very quickly; he self-diagnosed quickly, completed 2-week program. Got good job, married 1 year-ish later, 2 good kids (college now.)

I moved out 1+ year ago after seriously violent incident, and other unhappiness, so there are no guarantees. But simple intervention can work.

GOOD LUCK!

[Manifestor_of_Light]

25. Yes, and no.

Elderly female relative hooked on prescription drugs (downers) for decades. Also was a severe hoarder with Alzheimer's disease.

Was checked into a regular hospital for medical care and also seen by a psychiatrist. All she did was get mad and argue with the psychiatrist in family sessions. Total waste of time.

Her small town doctor and her small town pharmacist started hating her husband because he wasn't supporting their gravy train of her dependency anymore.

After she checked into the hospital and they ran tests, they found out her carotid arteries were blocked and she had surgery to clear those out. Because of our intervention, it saved her life because of the blockage being found.

Was she thankful??? Hell no. She was still mad at us for interfering with her life. She never thought she had a problem with sleeping her life away and hoarding empty pill bottles and coffee jars.

No good deed goes unpunished.

[Heidi]

26. Is knowing that you did the right thing

any consolation? Thank you for caring enough to intervene. :hug: